Saturday, August 1, 2009

Sadder Budweiser

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Teachable Moment: When the going gets tough, the, the tough...let's, screw it! Bartender, another round!

Bonus Cartoon: Because a punchline is a terrible thing to waste.

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Friday, July 31, 2009

Rodney King of Beers

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Okay, in terms of inspirational eloquence it's hardly the "I Have a Dream" speech, but then again, Skip Gates isn't exactly Martin Luther King, Jr.

Unsurprisingly, the Whitehouse Racial Summit and Beerfest was a complete waste of time and tax money. The president didn't apologize for calling police officers stupid. Professor "Skip" Gates didn't apologize for making false claims of racism. Sgt Crowley didn't apologize for doing his duty. And Joe Biden didn't apologize for showing up without an invitation and hogging all the Chex Mix.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Teachable Moment Party

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Today, the Whitehouse is teaching us all a very important important civic lesson: when a president wrongly accuses a white policeman of being a stupid racist, and a Harvard professor makes false claims of racism while declaring the policeman to be a "rogue cop," then no one should apologize, and everyone should have a beer.

With no need for embarrassing apologies prior to making up, we can now look forward to Hillary Clinton sitting down for brewskis and laughs with Iran and Israel. And gosh darn it, who's to say that after so many years in the desert, Osama bin Laden wouldn't mellow out over a frosty mug of ale with the president?

Let the record show that Hope n' Change is the first major media outlet to officially label the president's bold new direction as "Beer Goggle Diplomacy!"

Bonus from the Hope n' Change Gift Shoppe - free "Teachable Moments" poster!

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The Viking Way

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We're not saying that legislation for Obamacare or "Cap and Trade" is dead by any means, despite plunging poll numbers and growing voter distrust and anger. We're just saying that we really like yodeling.

UPDATE: Obama and the House Dems are now saying that there will be no vote on the healthcare bill until October. Which means that a lot of congresspeople are going to get a chance to hear how their constituents feel about the probability of losing the health insurance they have now, watching medical costs skyrocket, losing control of their personal medical choices, seeing doctors go out of business and, oh yeah, the proposed "final solution" for useless old people...

In the meanwhile, let's listen for the sweet sound of yodeling!

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Senior Discount

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The primary means by which Obama hopes to cut healthcare costs is by denying services to the elderly. Dr Ezekial Emanuel, brother of Whitehouse chief of staff Rahm Emanuel, has been appointed by the president to supervise the changes - and even HE says "Vague promises of savings from cutting waste, enhancing prevention and wellness, installing electronic medical records and improving quality are merely 'lipstick' cost control, more for show and public relations than for true change."

Strangely, AARP has essentially betrayed its membership by endorsing the healthcare plan, without telling seniors that the president plans to cut $500 billion from Medicare funding at the same time the baby boomers will be adding millions of new patients to the already underfunded system.

The government rational behind denying healthcare to seniors is that funds should only be spent on those people who might still be "productive" to society. In other words, not people who have paid taxes for 40 years...but people who can be forced to pay higher taxes for another 40 years.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Teachable Moment

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For once, Hope n' Change actually agrees with the president - this is a "teachable moment." Absent anything like a genuine apology (he admits only that his words could have been "better calibrated"), we can see that even when he admittedly doesn't know the facts, the president harbors negative prejudices against whites in general and police in particular.

But more frighteningly, the president acts on those prejudices - making statements on national television which unavoidably ramp up racial tensions, and choosing a Supreme Court nominee who dismissed the rights of white firefighters without even the courtesy of issuing a formal legal opinion.

Teachable Moment - Pop Quiz: In an effort to make the controversy go away, Obama has invited Professor Gates and Sgt. Crowley to the Whitehouse for a beer.

Question 1: if Gates is asked for a picture ID at the Whitehouse, will he shriek and insult Obama's mother?

Question 2:
if Sgt. Crowley is asked for a picture ID at the Whitehouse, do you think he'll throw a screaming fit or act like a rational adult?

Free Bonus: from the Hope n' Change Gift Shoppe, the official "Calibration" motivational poster!

UPDATE: audio of actual 911 call released. The woman who called never brought up race, and stressed that she didn't know if it was a break-in or just someone having a hard time getting into their home. Listen to Gates 911 call here.

Actual Teachable Moment:

Sunday, July 26, 2009


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The "Blue Dog" democrats have stalled Obamacare in the House of Representatives by demanding that the plan include at least a marginally plausible explanation of how it can reduce healthcare costs. In return, the Democratic leadership has been smacking the Blue Dogs with rolled-up newspapers (and other media), while threatening to "rub your nose in it."