News of the Whirled

We're letting the cartoon do the talking today, because the vapidity of those on the Left - and what they consider newsworthy - pretty much leaves us speechless. And by "speechless," we of course mean we don't want to open our mouths and risk spilling what we're drinking.

But fortunately, that's not the case for our liberal correspondent, who is here to share her personal insights into the critically important process of candidate selection...

Supreme Courting Disaster

As the days count down until the Supreme Court's decision on the legality of most Obamacare subsidies (spoiler alert: they're not legal), the president is casting aside courtroom rhetoric in favor of good old fashion foot-stomping, hand-clapping, gospel-style preaching which essentially says to the unwashed that "there is no way to the doctor except by Me."

Certainly this was the case with Obama's speech yesterday to the Catholic Health Association in which he argued that the moral imperative of his healthcare plan trumps fiddly little details like legality, practicality, and actual administration of meaningful healthcare.

In his shoes, which are tap-dancing pretty frantically at the moment, we'd be making the same argument. After all, he certainly doesn't want to be talking about how insurance premiums are expected to skyrocket (by as much as 51%) in 49 states this year.

Or that multiple healthcare exchanges are already collapsing, including in his alleged home state of Hawaii, after it spent nearly $24,000 for each person they signed up for Obamacare.

In an echo of the imaginary "jobs saved" by his stimulus program, the president now wants to quantify the success of Obamacare in terms of what hasn't happened and can't be measured: "the tally of pain and tragedy and bankruptcies that have been averted...the security of a parent who can afford to take her kid to the doctor...the dignity of a grandfather who can get the preventive care he needs."

And our personal favorite from Mr. Humility, "The joy of a wife who thought she’d never again take her husband’s hand and go for a walk in God’s creation.”

In other words, the Supreme Court shouldn't meddle in the province of the Supreme Being. Hussein be His name.

Beaches?! We Don't Need No Stinking Beaches!

Saturday marked the 71st anniversary of the historic D-Day invasion...which you'd think would make a pretty darn good topic for Barack Obama's weakly address (and no, that's not a typo). But instead, the president decided to harangue Americans  about June being "Immigrant Heritage Month." Although to be fair, we're sure he'll give equal time to "National Border Security Month" whenever it gets here.

For those with short memories or recent public educations, back in 1944 France had a pretty serious problem with people trampling their borders, speaking a foreign language, and forcing the locals to change their politics, taxes, and culture to accommodate the newly arrived "dreamers" (so-called because they shared Adolph Hitler's "Dreams From My Fatherland"). And believe it or not, back then the United States was against that sort of thing!

But not today. Barack Obama declared that America is actually made stronger by people who trample our borders, speak a foreign language, and are forcing us to change our politics, taxes, and culture.

And according to the president, we can't just celebrate the rich heritage of illegal immigration, "we have to defend it." Specifically, he mentioned defending it from the evil sieg-heiling Republicans whom he seems to imagine are in cliff-top bunkers mercilessly spraying down machine gun fire at the dreamers bravely storming the bloodsoaked beaches of the Rio Grande.

And just to reinforce his not-so-subtle suggestion that Americans lack any moral authority to regulate immigration, he again spoke of Michelle and his daughters, "some of whose ancestors came here in chains." A thought so sad that it makes Hope n' Change want to send the ladies a reparation check if we can just get an address for one of the five-star luxury hotels they'll be staying in during their European vacation next week.

Barack Obama's choice of the anniversary of D-Day to denigrate Americans and praise our nation's invaders is almost the supreme irony. And we say "almost" only because he managed to top it only 24 hours later.

Because that's when he flew overseas to enjoy beer and sausages with the Germans.

Update: In the commentary above, we unintentionally made it sound like D-Day was an exclusively American operation. As we mark this 71st anniversary, let us also remember the many brave Brits, New Zealanders, Australians, Canadians and Poles who fought and died in Operation Overlord.