Bad Optics

Because it's the most offensive thing they can possibly do, House democrats are now calling for a federal investigation of the group which secretly recorded Planned Parenthood officials casually discussing baby butchery and potentially illegal organ sales during business lunches.

Democrat Representative Jan Schakowsky of Illinois, seen above, is concerned that the videomakers may have broken laws, although it's not clear if she believes the laws were broken in "crunchy" or "less crunchy" ways.

The group behind the videos, the Center for Medical Progress, is also being accused by the democrats of using deceptive language when filing for tax-exempt status. Although according to the Hope n' Change legal department, the wording on the application was accurate in a vague sort of way - which is a lot more than we can say about Obamacare.

For now, we're hoping that the damning videos keep coming and we don't plan to offer a tissue to Planned Parenthood with which to dry their crocodile tears. Especially since they wouldn't even recognize a "tissue" which didn't have a small beating heart.

BONUS: BACK TO THE FATHERLAND

On Friday, Barack Obama will be visiting Kenya in order to launch a million jokes about his alleged birth certificate. But Hope n' Change isn't going there (either the easy joke or Kenya) because the real reason the president traveled to the home nation of his abandoning, philandering, bigamist, alcoholic father was to attend a summit on entrepreneurship.

Which is odd, since last time we noticed, Barry Jr. was dead set against any endeavor which might rely on personal initiative or result in a profit.

Still, we're sure that his insights on business will be very, very helpful to the Kenyan people...

Waiving the Flag

We're just going to be totally up front about the fact that there's no way B. Hussein could come out ahead, in our eyes, in his long-delayed decision to lower flags to half-staff for the victims of Muhammad Abdulazeez.

We were aghast at his original decision not to lower flags while offering up rationalizations like "that's only for senior statesmen" or "we don't want to have to decide whether or not to do it every time a service member is killed." But since this dithering represented about the standard degree of assholery from this administration, we were willing to accept it and move on.

But now Obama has ordered the flags to be lowered. Not because it was the right and moral thing to do,  but because too many angry members of the public called him out on it. In a rare instance of genuine transparency, it was clear that Obama simply wanted to bury the story as quickly as possible, along with any troubling questions about Islamic radicalism in our nation.

Hope n' Change is glad that the victims are now being shown appropriate respect, but saddened that the tragedy of their deaths was compounded by the spectacle of a president who cared only about his own agenda.

BONUS: BATTERED CHILDREN

In the latest round of videos exposing Planned Parenthood's ghoulish trade in fetal organs, a secret camera captured Dr. Mary Gatter (former president of the Planned Parenthood Medical Directors' Council) haggling over the price of "specimens," and promising to use "less crunchy" methods of killing each fetus to ensure the availability of intact organs.

Since Planned Parenthood makes such a point of saying they offer "choice" to pregnant women, we wonder if future clients will be given the choice of a crunchy or less crunchy abortion when they're in the stirrups?

Not likely. Because above all else, Planned Parenthood feels that the most important part of a woman's right to "choose" is the necessity of keeping her comfortably ignorant about what she's choosing.

Leftovers

Everyone deserves a slow Monday from time to time, including Hope n' Change. That's why we're serving up some cartoons which we posted on Facebook and Twitter over the weekend rather than coming up with anything absolutely brand-spanking new.

After all, look what we had to work with: the same government still puzzling over the "motivation" for the Chattanooga terror killings has just issued a warning for pet owners not to kiss their chickens because of a risk of salmonella.

And speaking of peckers, after the most recent round of previously sealed court documents, does anyone believe anymore that Bill Cosby isn't a a dreadful woman-drugging sex fiend and probable rapist? We can't bear to make jokes about it, because we're frankly miserable that we can never listen to our beloved old Cosby recordings again and enjoy them.

Meanwhile, back in the here and now, Lindsay Graham is attacking Donald Trump for insulting John McCain, and frankly we've got a suggestion for all three of them and a rolling doughnut. And on the Democrat side, candidate Martin O'Malley has officially apologized for upsetting a group of liberal activists by saying "all lives matter," which apparently is now seen by the Left as some sort of racist KKK rallying cry.

SOooo, here's some leftover levity with which to kick off the week. Hopefully there will be fresher pickin's by Wednesday!