Wednesday, April 13, 2016

Born To Run (to the Ladies Room)

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, springsteen, north carolina, lgbt, gay rights, mayberry, andy griffith, barney
"We've gotta NIP it! Nip it in the bud!"
Rocker Bruce Springsteen has cancelled a concert appearance in Greensboro, North Carolina to protest the state's law which segregates bathroom privileges based exclusively on an individual's God-given plumbing rather than their current (and sometimes flexible) gender self-identification. Moreover, in an additional show of solidarity for the "whichever damn bathroom we choose" crowd,  Springsteen has changed the name of his backup group to "The P Street Band."

Mind you, Hope n' Change is a vocal advocate of gay rights, including gay marriage and tiered cake consumption. But we still have a significant problem with a lipstick-wearing man visiting the powder room to drain his lizard in the sink next to a stunned 6 year old girl.

A potential governmental solution is to require buildings in every state to have separate restrooms for each sexual identity group (indeed, even the White House now sports transgender bathrooms). The problem is that, according to Facebook, there are 51 such classifications now - meaning that every room in a public building will soon have to be a bathroom, and the odds are that your bladder will explode long before you're able to decipher the cryptic icons on bathroom doors representing the Genderqueer, Transgenders, Pangenders, Androsexuals, Demisexuals, Intersexuals, Lipstick Lesbians, Skoliosexuals, or Native American "Two-Spirits."

Not to be outdone by Springsteen, geriatric rocker Bryan Adams also stunned the music world on two fronts: first by pointing out that he's still alive, and second by cancelling an alleged concert in Mississippi (disappointing dozens) to protest their antiquated binary bathroom laws.

Who knew, after all this time, that his fleeting radio hit "Cuts Like a Knife" was about gender reassignment surgery?

40 comments:

  1. Our local grocery store has gender-neutral bathrooms.
    They provide a toilet, urinal, sink with mirror and a dipper changing table. They are also large and ADA approved. They are used by one individual at a time, or Mom and child, etc.. The down side is that there is usually a line. The cost to have many of these (say sports arena) would be outrageous. If you only had a few of the gender-neutral bathrooms the transgender crowd would NEVER be satisfied. After all why should both of those genetic women make transgender folks wait in line?

    Springsteen is trying to punish the government. He’s only succeeding in hurting the local business, the concert promoter and what few fans he has left and his bottom line. Not a very smart businessman is he. There are many ways he could have made his point without shooting himself in the foot. I see him as a fool.

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  2. with the LGBTQ crowd demanding (and getting) special legal protections, how long will it be before the sheep-shaggers demand their "rights"? this stupidity / insanity HAS to end soon!

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  3. Only 51 sexual assignments? Come on, we can do better than that. If we really try we should be able to come up (so to speak) with at least 8,739 different sexual assignments. And while all the good folks are trying to figure out which sexual assignment fits whom, O'dizzy and company are spitting out one executive order after another. Oh, and importing another 2,833,416 'refugees' from the down and out countries where there are no bathrooms in the first place. Hmmmm, maybe that will add another 872 sexual assignments. Oh, the humanity...... Where's my 'shine?

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  4. Per Bruce "The Bitch" Springsteen and Bryan "Who?" Adams: breach of contract suit much? They should have their asses - and assets - sued off by the concert promoters, local businesses who would have benefited by the anticipated crowds (or dozens), and every schmoe who bought a ticket. Hit them where libtards feel the pain most readily: in their own wallet...

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  5. Ahhh Just do like I do- piss out back. (appears this is not a good rule for church but other than that......)

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  6. I am more than willing to see such a law passed here if it keep the 'boss', brian adams and other blazing liberals (the president and family?) out of our fair state but they gotta promise. None of this I will leave the country if this republicans is elected- they got to pinky swear and mean it.
    Meanwhile back in the real word last Friday's media dump on 'fast and furios' dumped thousand of black sheets of paper that the white hut said would speed up the time it took to redact everything on every sheet.

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  7. Bruce Springsteen has been a caricature for some time. His populist rhetoric, delivered in some fake Tom Joad accent is so condescending, exactly like Hillary and her contrived folksiness. Another insane 1%er throwing down with "the people". Piss Off.

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  8. We have it all wrong - restrooms should be three, male, female, and fexible. If it's ok for transgendered men to pee with normal girls and transgendered girls to pee with normal boys, then transgendered men, transgendered women, lesbians, and homo men should have no problem using the same multigendered, polisexual restrooms.

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  9. I think the government should offer free Depends to anyone who is not sure which bathroom they should use. Problem solved.

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  10. Liberty,

    We should label the restrooms as He, She and It. Rules of Engagement: If you are born with male genitalia and what to be male - He. If you are born with female genitalia and want to be female - She. Anything else - It.

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  11. Who really gives a rats ass what sprinsteen thinks, or any body else that is a PC faggot?

    I'm really tired of this crap foisted on us by a really small percent of the population.

    Maybe the perverts should read and see what God has to say about their evil practices.

    Bob
    III

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  12. New restroom signs include "got one" for males and "had one" for gender re-assignment males.

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  13. Aw CRAP! Bruce Jennitals... Bruce Springsteen... Makes me want to change my name... (but NOT to Susan, (thx to The Tick, "Thrakkorzog" episode, S1 E8)).

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  14. So apparently it's ok for a liberal to withhold services because of their beliefs......

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  15. So apparently it's ok for a liberal to withhold services because of their beliefs......

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  16. @Joseph ET- I'm all for gender neutral bathrooms for one, but as you point out it's not efficient for public spaces that need to serve a lot of people. And I agree that Springsteen's protest is stupid- if he really wants to make a statement, why doesn't he appear in North Carolina and sing a new protest song intended to effect change? Genuine artists try to change the world by confronting it with their art - not running away.

    @George in Houtx- Even when laws against sheep-shagging are banished, the practitioners will still find themselves taking it on the lamb.

    @Fred Ciampi- Excellent point about bringing in refugees from places that are entirely intolerant of the LGBTEIEIO crowd, and not all that crazy about indoor plumbing in general.

    @Emmentaler Limburger- Lawsuits should definitely be flying on this. And I can't imagine that the people who had concert tickets are going to be pleased with "The Boss" (who should perhaps now be called "The Piss" owing to his strong feelings on the matter).

    @REM1875- You piss in an Australian-themed steak house?! (grin) And regarding libs who promise to leave the country if so-and-so candidate wins, I agree that it's time we start having them sign legally binding documents that will make their exile official.

    @TrickyRicky- There's nothing wrong with popularism in the right context (I'm a sucker for old Frank Capra movies), but the hue and cry over bathrooms is just stupid. Piss off, indeed.

    @Liberty Card- I agree that three restrooms should be enough to sort everything out. Hopefully those selecting "other" would be enlightened enough not to be judgemental of whoever else is in there.

    @Geoff King- Brilliant! We already know that those on the Left want the government to Pamper them...

    @Boligat- I think labeling a door "It" will be seen as insensitive and dehumanizing. How about "He," "She," and "Whee!"

    @idahobob- As I said in my comments, I'm a gay rights advocate and any theological issues aren't in my bailiwick. That being said, public bathrooms aren't about 51 forms of sexuality, they're about doing "number one" or "number two" and having a reasonable expectation of some privacy while in the act.

    If I have access to a stall with a door, I don't much care who's in the next cubby. We're all God's chilluns and sooner or later we've all got to go.

    @Anonymous- Just be careful about going in the door that says "want one"...

    @Bruce Bleu- You've still got Bruce Banner, Robert the Bruce, and Bruce Wayne holding up your name's honor. Although now that I think of it, "holding up your Bruce" sounds like something you'd do to keep pee off your wingtips.

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  17. Somewhere in European airport I was using the urinal when a lady came out of a stall and walked by me; neither of us were upset. I don't know how that happened but the urinal seemed to indicate I was in the clear. Maybe women stand to whiz over there and I didn't read the sign correctly. Maybe the ladies room was out of order; that seems most likely. Might we stop all this male, female & in-between stuff? Every one just flush and wash their hands. And for worried parents: Don't travel with or take the children out. [grin]

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  18. I nust saw a meme with Bryan Adams which states he cancels a comcert because of the Mississippi law, but performed in Saudi Arabia (?) where gays are sent to prison for being gay. Hypocritical.

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  19. @Stilton - thanks for deftly inserting that Devo earworm into my head... it's gonnna be there all day now.

    @Rod - a big AMEN to the "flush and wash their hands" comment. Some people's bathroom etiquette makes me shudder. I will refrain from offering examples to save people from revisiting their last meals. Let's just say... Howie Mandel has the right idea: never shake hands.

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  20. Never liked bruce anyway , now I like him even less. I wonder if he would let his children use the same bathroom with a man wearing a dress ? I live in North Carolina and I like the fact we now have a governor who has a backbone & stands on principal rather than political correctness. I have relatives and friends who are disappointed bruce is cancelling his show.. and I tell them why would you want to go hear someone sing who sounds like they are in a constant state of constipation. just my 2 cents.

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  21. As the great John Ekdahl recently said, "What a stupid time to be alive."

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  22. Meanwhile, in Canada:
    http://conservativetribune.com/bathrooms-gender-neutral/

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  23. "what the heck is the "G" in a Bacon, Lettuce, and Tomato sandwich?!"
    Garnish! What are we? Uncivilized??

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  24. I can remember when Bruce Springsteen was supposedly the "voice of the blue-collar everyman". Now he's just another wailing boutique Progressive of the pajama-boy establishment. Sad. (I'm currently re-writing "Born in the USA" to reflect this)

    This, BTW, is another example of why Trump is so popular. (The establishment GOP is already folding on this nonsense) Could it be that Trump is the Springsteen of the post-modern era?

    As for the bathrooms & showers: Barely a generation ago, was not the feminist mantra that anything that could possibly in any way make any woman feel vulnerable or "uncomfortable" (like an off-color joke) be considered “harassment”, immoral, and be made illegal and actionable? How far we’ve come from that today, where they're now arguing that any guy who doesn't completely "identify" as a hetrosexual male should feel free to pop into the women's showers. Feel "uncomfortable" yet ladies? If you do, now you’re the ones with the morality hangup.

    Establishment feminism jumped the shark almost two decades ago when contrary to all previous rhetoric on such behavior, it went all-in to defend the presidency of an obvious misogynist, and likely sexual predator. (Today, what’s left of it is going all-in to support that President’s wife, the woman who ran a vicious attack machine against her husband’s accusers; again clearly contrary to the “all victims should be heard and believed” rhetoric of the sisterhood she now boldly proclaims)

    That whole sad episode exposed what many of us had known for quite some time; that establishment feminism was no longer about the interests of women, but had devolved to being little more than a political arm of the far-left. After having lost all street-cred post-Clinton, what was left of establishment feminism found refuge (and stable employment) in academia, where it started to build a new political base around a LGTBQWERTY-based agenda. So now we get 51 flavors of "gender" that all must be accommodated lest there be cries of "discrimination!".

    I've got a stopwatch running for the first rebuke of my comments on this as the product of "straight privilege".

    BTW, something on "rights": A "right" is inalienable. Something cannot be a "right" if it requires an imposition upon another citizen.

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  25. Nobody cares what Loose Leafspring says except maybe Christie Creme.

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  26. Unlike the author I was once a homosexual supporter, and by supporter I mean someone who did not much care what they did. Their life, their choice. I've had a homosexual - business partner, accountant, employee, and good friend (four different people). I went to a homosexual wedding @ 25 years ago. (The marriage did not last when the 'wife' decided they wanted to be straight.)

    I still don't much care what the LGBT community does when left to its own devices. My problem is that they have become fascist in their mandates. The demand that all of our bathrooms change to fit their agenda is merely the latest absurdity. Nope, no longer a supporter or particularly tolerant.

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  27. LMAO today! Just when I think it can’t get any weirder. What’s next, afraid to even think about it. So much wrong with our country & this is "important" legislation.

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  28. @idahobob, it's not the infinitesimally small percent of the population that is foisting this on us, it's the vast army of left-wingers who infest every portion of our society on their behalf. The same ones who demand we accept what many consider abnormal behavior, mock and ridicule those who have religious beliefs. Why should Bruce Springsteen be lauded for exercising his personal beliefs, but bakers and florists must be penalized and bankrupted? I hope he gets sued by the concert promoters, vendors who had already purchased goods to sell and folks who lost money beyond the ticket, such as nonrefundable airline fares or hotel deposits. What about minimum wage workers who were going to have a job at the concert which they desperately need? I don't give a flying fig about Springsteen, Bryan Adams or any other self-important so-called entertainer. I don't have to waste my money on them but they should be publicly shamed.

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  29. Stilty,

    Technically speaking, "It" means "neither masculine nor feminine" so if it's dehumanizing, blame the Romans, they thought it up.

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  30. Actually Rod, public female urinals are OLD school, and apparently making a comeback. Possibly never left in Europe...
    http://www.straightdope.com/columns/read/226/whats-the-deal-with-urinals-in-womens-restrooms

    Putting commodes in stalls in all facilities and making them all gender neutral would be fine w/ me.

    School locker rooms is probably a different issue - far too many people hung up on "nekkid >> Sexy >> BAD!!!" for us to get past nudity taboos any time in the near future. And, IMAO, that's the root solution. If people quit conflating 'nude' w/ 'sexy' (and seriously, just LOOK at most of us - even w/ clothes ON!) then it really wouldn't matter if the person next to you in the shower was he, she, or 'whee'...

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  31. At Pete (Detroit):
    That was quite a while back but I'll be darned... was in wrong rest room maybe. Glad everyone stayed cool. Thanks for this information; I learned something today.

    Did I tell ya'll about the urinal in Netherlands that a little porcelain house-fly molded into the bowl ... for a target. Surely was in the right place that time.

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  32. Stilton, Bruce actually makes some pretty nice anchors, but I don't have a lot of demand for them here in Colorado. Thanks for the positive allusions.

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  33. What's next? Giving people hormones to make us all gender neutral? Or letting children pick their gender like they would pick a career? PC is getting Pretty Crazy.

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  34. Somebody should tell Springsteen that all that New Jersey/working class/Born in the USA horseshit is about 25 years out of date. Besides doesn't he live in Hollywood now? In a mansion papered in greenbacks? Cocktails with Susan Sarandon and other lefty whiners of that ilk?

    I remember from way back the tag for his first album "At last the world is ready for Bruce Springsteen!". No shit. Here in Australia we call that kind of attitude as being totally 'up yourself'.

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  35. Fear not! Once the Left have achieved their goal, and the People's Democratic Republic of America is established, then the LGBTetc crowd will be first against the wall (along with most of the entertainment industry). Then the bathroom problem will go away.
    Simplez!

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  36. Along the same lines, check out the January 8th issue of Terminal Lance. If identify as a caninekin may i then pee on someone's leg?

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  37. @Barry in Britain, what I am waiting for is the "culture clash" to start taking hold here as it has in Britain & Europe. After all, the left is also intent upon importing millions of people who aren't nearly as "tolerant" of other cultures as we are. As you well know, omni-generational Europeans are already being told to dial-back their cultural heritage as to not "offend" the newcomers. After another decade or so, what you suggest will likely be headlines instead of speculation in a blog post. (That's assuming that there will be any free media or blogs left, of course)

    In fact, if I were you I'd already be expecting a visit from the constabulary.

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  38. Stilton, my use of the term "sheep-shaggers" is my way of lumping together AOP (All Other Perversions). as for all of this uproar about restrooms, post two signs. a picture of a banana on the DUDES room and a picture (top view) of an apricot or peach for the CHICKS. place a notice for the person to check in their pants to see which they most closely resemble.

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  39. Nipping in the bud?Isn't that how we got into this idiocy of everybody poops in the same room?

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