TGIF It

Eat your heart out, Tony Stark

Hope n' Change is taking the day off owing to the stringent requirements of our "Vow of Sanity."

Seriously - more plane crashes, more anti-Israel rhetoric, more IRS obfuscation, more Boko Haram violence, more presidential fundraisers, more of everything that (as Aristotle once quipped) "blows donkey dicks." Although admittedly, that phrase sounded a lot more urbane when he said it in the original Greek.

So we're spending the day cleaning the vast Hope n' Change office complex while listening to  relaxing New Age music (if you have Amazon Prime, you can listen to the same album for free!) and sipping decaf.

And by "decaf" we mean cheap box wine (but we checked - it's caffeine free.)

Enjoy your weekend and, if you happen to see me lumbering down the street in the metal suit above, give me a "shave and a haircut" knock on the helmet when it's safe to come out.    -Stilton

Tear Down This Law

Yesterday, a three-judge panel ruled that the language contained in Obamacare's previously unread 2000+ pages specifically spells out an inconvenient truth: federally funded subsidies are illegal for anyone purchasing health insurance policies from the federally-run exchanges (ie, "Healthcare.gov") in 36 states.

Conservatives and constitutionalists were quick to cheer, predicting that the legal ruling might represent a long-awaited death blow to Obamacare. But their hope was short won: only hours later, another federal appeals court issued a ruling in opposition to the first federal appeals court, and said that because the critical language in the law was "ambiguous," it could be interpreted by the IRS (the heavily armed, politically partisan enforcement wing of Obamacare) to mean whatever the hell they wanted it to mean.

To put it another way, if a law is incomprehensibly confusing, the second decision says it should be interpreted by an agency that can't even follow the simple instructions (not to mention laws) for backing up their emails.

Because of the conflicting rulings, a smug Josh Earnest says that the White House will ask for the whole hot mess to be reviewed by a higher appeals court with 11 members - 7 of whom were appointed by Democrats. Guess how that body will rule.

And following that fustercluckery, it's likely that the competing rulings will eventually meander all the way to the Supreme Court for final adjudication. But to borrow the words of a genuinely despicable (and filthy rich!) politician, "What does it matter?"

Because the Supreme Court pretty much lost its last shred of credibility after Chief Justice John Roberts completely invented the reasons for approving Obamacare as constitutional. And even if the Supreme Court did rule that the Obama administration is breaking the law by handing out money illegally - what would anyone do about it?

Seriously, Barack Obama breaks the law as routinely as Joe Biden guffaws at his own farts, and in both cases everyone in Washington either ignores it or claims to smell roses.

In all candor, Hope n' Change is feeling genuinely wounded by this whiplash of judicial activity: a sudden ray of sunlight - followed immediately by the crushing fist of darkness. Leave it to Barack Hussein Obama to turn our "hope" into a vulnerability.

One Giant Leap...Backwards

This past weekend saw the 45th anniversary of two significant events: Teddy Kennedy causing the death of Mary Jo Kopechne at Chappaquiddick (and getting away with it), and astronaut Neil Armstrong taking the first step onto the moon. Hope n' Change is old enough to remember both.

Which is why we're feeling wistful and angry today about what this country once was...and what it doesn't seem to be anymore. The drive for great accomplishments seems to have sputtered to a halt and our past achievements have fallen into disrepair. It seems that no one sane is actually looking forward to the nation's future anymore. Instead, the (ahem) "vision" of the government is simply managing (and not incidentally hastening) America's decline.

Today, the United States has no independent capacity to put a man in space. We are simply passengers in someone else's vehicle - and Mary Jo Kopechne found out how well that works.

So it's legitimate to ask, can we go back? And the answer is yes - in fact, Barack Obama announced just last week his multi-million dollar plan to go back to the place that captured the world's attention 45 years ago.

Not the moon, of course.

He's going back to Martha's Vineyard - the home of Chappaquiddick Island - for yet another vacation from his exhausting schedule of scandals and failures.

"History, we have a problem..."