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Johnny Optimism
Check out Stilton Jarlsberg's other webcomic "Johnny Optimism!" Updates M-W-F!
In the face of a collapsing economy, rampant unemployment, and global instability, Barack Hussein Obama took office in 2008 promising Hope and Change. The "Hope" thing didn't really work out, but we got plenty of "Change" as everything got worse. And now, the jug-eared jackass has a second term.
That's why at Hope n' Change Cartoons, we're creating conservative smartaleckry to provide a little laughter in these strange times. Cartoons will probably be posted Monday and Wednesday, and definitely on Friday. Additionally, cartoons and graphics will be posted randomly on our Facebook page and Friday we'll add the week's postings right here to kick around in one of the greatest comments sections on the Web.Note: please feel free to repost our cartoons on your favorite blogs!
Everyone likes to dress up and play "pretend" for Halloween, which perhaps explains the three idiots from CNBC who were pretending to be journalists during Wednesday night's GOP debate.
Not that they fooled anyone. With hilariously biased, condescending, and argumentative questions the three moderators accomplished the impressive feat of largely unifying the candidates, the studio audience, and the viewing public - all of whom agree that transparent liberal bias has made a mockery of what used to be an honorable profession.
Despite the GOP candidates themselves generally making a good showing, Democrat front runner Hillary Clinton had the appalling lack of taste to tweet an animated GIF taken from the Benghazi hearings as her reaction. It shows her smugly brushing imaginary crumbs from her shoulder, as if to say that dealing with any GOP opponent will be as easy for her as ducking responsibility for four American deaths.
But for now, let's put aside the real horrors of a corrupt media and an even more corrupt politician and focus on other frights associated with one of Hope n' Change's favorite holidays...
Frankly, Hope n' Change wasn't expecting anything really scary to arrive at our door until Halloween, but it turns out that Obamacare has jumped the gun by presenting us with a trick that is definitely no treat.
We already knew that "if you like your doctor, you can keep your doctor" was a lie. But it turns out "if you like your NEW doctor, you can keep your doctor" was also a lie. Because we, along with over 300,000 other folks in Texas, were just informed that Blue Cross Blue Shield has "discontinued" every individual PPO health insurance policy statewide because under the Affordable Care Act, "some affordable plans are no longer affordable for the company to sustain."
We're shocked. Shocked.
The letter we received cheerily pointed out that we don't need to do anything to have a brand new policy assigned to us. A policy under which our premiums will be raised to about $17,000 a year (for two healthy adults), our deductible is raised substantially, medical expenses which were covered 100% will only be 70% covered, we can't get prescriptions from the pharmacy we've used for years, and we can no longer see the physicians who were covered on our PPO plan. Instead, we're being downgraded into an HMO plan with a very limited pool of doctors, and we must choose one ("or we'll pick one for you!") who will become the gatekeeper of all our medical care.
Nothing will be covered unless it is specifically ordered by a second tier doctor (if we're lucky) who will be receiving bonuses for limiting care and denying referrals to other doctors.
Hilariously, the health insurance market doesn't even reopen until November 1st, meaning we've got 3 or 4 anxiety-filled days of vomiting blood before we can go online to compare plans from other insurance providers (if any) and sign up for something before the December deadline.
We're certainly not alone in this fiasco (not even counting the other 300,000 Texans whom Blue Cross just put out to pasture.) Nationwide, health care exchanges are going bankrupt, official estimated enrollment for 2016 Obamacare plans has been scaled way down, and premiums and medical costs are skyrocketing.
But at least wealth is getting redistributed and citizens are getting the fear of God (or at least of government) put into them. Which was, of course, the goal all along.
And what a victory it is! No one in the State Department demoted or disciplined, and none of the not-so-spontaneous terrorists "brought to justice" by the Obama administration.
Liberals are in a celebratory mood following last week's appearance of Hillary Clinton before a special committee investigating the details of American deaths in Benghazi. Hillary is being declared "the winner" of the marathon session, not because she isn't responsible for gross negligence, professional incompetence, and quite likely criminal actions - but because she's going to get away with it.
In Liberal-land, there is no crime unless you're caught and convicted. This is true whether you're the IRS's Lois Lerner (who has officially been let off the hook for obstructing the first amendment rights of conservatives, conspiracy, and destruction of evidence), infamous "Fast and Furious" gun-runner Eric Holder, or the ghoulish officials from Planned Parenthood who were caught negotiating the price (and enjoying the texture) of fetal organs on video.
Evidence doesn't matter on the Left - only "getting away with it." Snarky liberal columnist Maureen Dowd took to the New York Times to declare Trey Gowdy's select committee a "Salem witch trial," staffed by a "blithering band of tea-partiers" who "crawled out of the ooze into a sea of cameras." And Hillary's unflustered performance put her on "the HOV lane of a superhighway to the presidency." I think we can assume "fair and balanced" isn't embossed on Dowd's business cards.
But Maureen's piece goes beyond burying the lede. In an unguarded moment of actual (and no doubt accidental) journalism near the end of her editorial, she concedes a few itty-bitty things which she believes only trivia buffs will care about: Obama and Hillary's policies helped destabilize Libya, Hillary showed no interest whatsoever in providing adequate security in Benghazi, and the former Secretary of State has no recollection of any contact with her "close friend" Ambassador Stevens (despite his many, many urgent attempts to get her attention and assistance) after she appointed him to the dangerous post which would eventually cost his life.
All of this matters, as Firewall's Bill Whittle passionately explains (click the link for his excellent video). But it doesn't matter to Democrats or the media. To them, "winning" is all that matters, regardless of right or wrong, or how many needless deaths were on the "losing" side.
Their new morality is no morality. And much like the "evil rich" they love to demonize, Democrats believe that - rules be damned - anything they can get away with is fair game.
Which is why, if Hillary does ride that "superhighway to the presidency," the last vestiges of what made this country great will become steaming roadkill.
BONUS: THIRD DEGREE BERNIE ON BENGHAZI
A clarifying Hope n' Change translation of what Bernie Sander's debate night remarks really meant...