Watching the Bowl Numbers

Wait, what are the kids talking about? Oh - THIS cereal box!

Copyrighted material, all rights reserved - and defended by a crazy guy. You don't want a piece of that.

Today, I couldn't quite bring myself to do a cartoon on Hillary's latest email scandal, Trump's visit to Mexico, or even Jeh Johnson's threat to have Homeland Security seize our election process to make sure that no foreign hackers can fudge the results. Although considering the dismal track records of Obama's State Department, the FBI, the IRS, and the DOJ, I see no reason to expect anything other than massive wrongdoing and blatant manipulation of votes from Homeland Security.

But allow me to pull back from this unpleasantness before I come down with a case of the vapors (and trust me, it could happen - I might fall into a swoon and need smelling salts, a loosened corset, and a wafting breeze from a rapidly flapped lace fan to restore me to consciousness).

No, today I'd rather invite you to have a little fun tripping down memory lane with me. I've mentioned before that my father, who is sadly no longer with us, was a real Renaissance man - a writer, artist, cartoonist, inventor, playwright, and much more. And one of the many things he created was the campaign button promotion shown above which was intended to run on the back of Post cereal boxes back in the 60's.

Back then, kids didn't have smartphones to play with at the table - lots didn't even have TVs. And so the backs of cereal boxes were prized kid real estate, not only as something to read while munching on Sugar Puffs, but also as a place to find stories, games, crafts and nifty prizes.

And such was the genesis of these silly campaign buttons, which kids could clip from the empty box and wear to school without needing to worry about offending anyone or giving trigger warnings. It was a simpler time, blessedly free of social media and a superabundance of lawyers.  Moreover, it was a time when candidates were less likely to be using words like bigot, racist, crooked, murderer, incompetent, and traitor when describing their competitors. Well, slightly less likely.

Anyway, this being a Friday (when I sometimes like to loosen things up around here - like, oh, the time to start drinking) it just seemed fun to share this actual family heirloom with everyone. And to remind folks that politics has always been pretty crazy, and that I come by my political cartooning DNA honestly.

And no, my father never got rich doing it either - in fact, I don't think this "campaign button" project ever actually appeared on those boxes.  But he did make sure we never ran out of cereal!

PS: FOR TODAY'S NEWS...

Even though we didn't feel like tackling the day's news, you can still get the full, witty conservative scoop from our good friends at The Daily Gouge! 

PPS: WHAT THE HECK...

Here are the rest of my Dad's campaign buttons. Collect 'em all!

Separated at Mirth?

Okay, a former government official who wears pants.

Some women just seem to make a pattern of forming relationships with unsavory characters who can't be trusted. Such is certainly the case with Hillary's right hand woman Huma Abedin, who has just announced her separation from husband Anthony Weiner, whose right hand is usually someplace we'd rather not talk about.

Weiner was caught sexting for the umpteenth time, but hit a new personal low (as far as we know) by sending his cyber-slut girlfriend pictures of a tentpole in his BVDs taken while Weiner's infant son was snuggling against him in bed. And yes, we just threw up in our mouths a little.

What puzzles us is why Hillary hasn't advised Huma to simply issue a statement that her husband is  the victim of a vast Right wing conspiracy?  Then again, when Hillary originally made that preposterous statement, she still needed her husband to have a shot at reaching the White House.

The infinitely ambitious Huma doesn't, which is why she is now free to just enjoy the Weiner roast.

BONUS: SECRETARY OF STFU

Sometimes, words just aren't enough.

On Monday, Secretary of State John Kerry opined that "perhaps the media would do us all a service if they didn't cover (terrorism) quite as much. People wouldn't know what's going on."

And of course by "people," he means voters - who really shouldn't know what's going on if it will hurt Hillary Clinton's chances of becoming president.

Then again, maybe the media really would do us all a service by cutting off stories dedicated to desperate attention seekers. After all, that's how we got Bernie Sanders, Donald Trump, Black Lives Matter, the Video Music Awards, and Kim Kardashian's ass.

Which would be the biggest ass on public view if John Kerry didn't hold the title.

OH, SWEET MYSTERY OF LIFE

Hey, don't blame us for the cartoon above - Gene Wilder wrote the joke for the grave scene in the incomparably wonderful "Young Frankenstein" and we thought it appropriately inappropriate to use it to remember his genius.

We were huge fans of Wilder, who seemed equally able to portray roles serious or comedic, gentle or frenzied. There was no one else like him, and we're grateful that this fine man left us with such a wonderful body of work at a time when laughter seems hard to come by. He will be greatly missed.

Race to the Bottom

"Did I say I had a dream? I meant nightmare."

So after 8 years of an historic black presidency, the contest to choose his replacement is boiling down to a single critical issue: which candidate hates black people the most.

Frankly, the cartoon above says what we want it too without much need for additional explanation. The country has gone out of its freaking mind on the subject of race, owing to the long term combination of liberal government policies (some well-intended, some less so) which have decimated black families and communities, and the Democrats' realization that they can harvest votes by keeping black Americans on a new and impoverished plantation. And it makes us sick.

Hope n' Change is old enough to remember rampant racism in this nation. Some of it casual, some of it hateful - but all of it unacceptable. We saw the "colored" drinking fountains with our own eyes, heard the cruel and casual use of the n-word, remember ax handles (suitable for beating uppity blacks who wanted to enter schools or restaurants) being handed out as Democratic campaign souvenirs, and saw the struggle for civil rights playing out in the streets of Selma.

We've seen so much progress since those days. And tragically, we've also seen so much of that progress lost for the previously mentioned reasons.

Readers of Hope n' Change know that we're not big fans of Donald Trump, but on this particular topic he's right. Trapping black Americans in poverty and entitlement programs for the purpose of collecting their votes is absolutely bigotry, as is the liberal belief that they're doing black Americans a huge favor because (looking around, then whispering) they're just not smart enough or motivated enough to take care of themselves. 

Our one initial hope for Barack Obama was that he could become a racial healer. Instead we got a political pyromaniac who will be leaving his post with the country burning.

These are serious issues, being treated unseriously by unserious people. In marked contrast to the little-reported efforts made by unfairly reviled House Speaker, Paul Ryan, to truly understand the problems of black American inner cities and propose sweeping and realistic solutions.

If Hillary is elected, she will continue stoking the racial fires that her predecessor has built. If Trump wins, he's promising to actually do something to reverse the current disastrous course of race relations in this nation.

Do we believe him? Only "maybe." But that's one helluva lot more than we believe Hillary, Barry, or the rest of the Democratic "good massahs" who seek political empowerment from the suffering imposed on others.