Saturday, January 22, 2011

A Keith Goodbye



Years from now, all of us will be able to answer the heartrending question "where were you when you heard Keith Olbermann was quitting?"

It came so suddenly, and so unexpectedly. One moment he's calling the Tea Party racist, or declaring Sarah Palin to be "The Worst Person In The World," and the next moment he's gone. Keith, we hardly knew ye.

Currently, there is no solid information about why Olbermann and MSNBC parted ways. There is absolutely no indication that Olbermann had a longstanding homosexual affair with mass-murderer Jared Loughner, nor is there anyone willing to go on record that MSNBC believed Olbermann to be a necrophiliac pedophile who hated minorities.

Although rumors abound, there is no confirmation that Olbermann was terminated for "enjoying himself" while looking at pictures of the First Lady's yams, nor should anyone believe - absent verifiable proof - that MSNBC forced him to leave because of drug, alcohol, and orphan abuse.

All we can say for sure at this point is that Keith Olbermann's journalistic voice has, for the time being, been stilled.

Which is proof that prayer works.

--

41 comments:

Steve said...

Aside from the overweight part, is this not a fair metaphor for what he has been doing for 2+ years with Obama ??

Ricko-Texas said...

The Progressive Left has always had a reputation of failure. And, when it becomes evident that they, the left, are losing; they tend to feed on themselves. They blame the opposition publicly, however in private, the begin to feed on themselves. Never once seeming to know that it is the socialistic platform that is destroying them...not their spokesmen.

Earl said...

Hm...Keith's former boss (General Electric CO Immelt) was just appointed by Obama to lead a new counsel on job creation. Is there a connection here? Uh, yes. It will be interesting to see where Keith pops up next and if he can keep his big, fat, liberal mouth shut so as not to deflect from Obama trying to refashion himself as a kinder, gentler centrist.

John the Econ said...

But really, where does one go after MSNBC?

Jack said...

"The Progressive Left has always had a reputation of failure"

Really Ricko? Please enlighten me to the failures of suffrage, civil rights, health care rights (that means Medicare, which pays for older adults, and Medicaid, which pays for poor familie), voters rights, workers rights, Pell grants and other funding for college, Social Security, public services such as parks and schools...the list goes on, but please, enlighten me. With your obviously very deep knowledge bank.

Anonymous said...

Troglodytes. You are all uncivilized and uncultured morons, who should be sterilized, so as not to create any progeny. Bye Bye.

Anonymous said...

Too bad [re]publcans have gone completely to fascism. Roosevelt and Lincoln would be ashamed to call themselves [re]publicans today. Oh yes, that is right, Abraham Lincoln and Theodore Roosevelt were... wait for it... Progressives!

Anonymous said...

Stilton, I've never noticed you holding back before. Why now?

Bobo said...

Will he become Oblahma's next Press Secretary? Who better could spread the lies of the annoited one? His name even sounds like Oblahma...Keith Olblahmermann.

Anonymous said...

Fox News should hire Olberman as a commentator. I'd like to see him go head-to-head with Charles Krauthammer in a civil, fair, and balanced debate.

cbullitt said...

So what's the over/under on the Olby suicide watch?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Jack- I'll be impressed with the Progressive Left's definition of "suffrage" when it not only includes the right of women to vote, but when it also includes their right to run for public office (like, oh, Vice President) without being demeaned and mocked because of their sex.

Civil rights? You mean the kind championed by Al Gore Sr and Robert "Exalted Klan Cyclops" Byrd? Or do you mean the "Great Society" programs which have destroyed the Black family in America?

You then talk about Medicare, Medicaid, Pell Grants, Social Security and lots of other things that the government "pays for" or "funds." Only they don't pay for anything. Rather, they just pass laws saying that the citizens will be forced to pay for those services through taxes...which is why, on the government's ledgers, every household in America now owes $546,668 to the feds (or more accurately, the Chinese). Which is why, with baby boomers finally lining up for their Progressively-promised benefits, the feces is now hitting the fan.

Voter rights? You mean the right to vote without identification, the right to intimidate others with a nightstick in a polling place, or the right for the dead to vote for Democrats? Or maybe the Progressive Left's push to end private ballots within unions, so dissenters can be identified and "handled."

Schools? You really want to take credit for what Progressives and teachers unions have done for the American education system?

Which pretty much leaves "parks" as your big accomplishment. And we know how much Progressives love parks... we can tell by the huge quantities of trash you leave strewn behind.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Anonymous (several above)- Wow, fascism! That would really be hard to refute if I had any idea what you were talking about. I'm impressed, however, by your ability to channel the dead spirits of Lincoln and Teddy Roosevelt to ask if they'd like to become registered Democrat voters.

And by the way, to whoever asked "why are you holding back, Stilton?" - I don't feverishly check this blog every moment of the day. Troll squashing is more of a hobby than a career.

AMR1960 said...

Some news...By it's very nature, calls-out for a soundtrack...

Na-na_Nah-na, na-na_Nah-na...hey_heeeyyyy, goodbyeeee...

Sing it!http://gosong.net/download/9gmZ4RJp5GQ/Na_Na_Na_Hey_Hey.html

Doc -Northern Nevada said...

@ Jack ... with the exception of womens suffrage (which was a grass roots 'Tea Party' style movement, NOT a government program - and once it accomplished its' goal - it disbanded!); tell me ONE of the programs you mentioned that has completely met (or even come close to meeting) its' original goals ... and on budget? Show me ONE of them that is not rampantly abused as a dumping ground for people who really do NOT want to work, but want everything handed to them for doing nothing (usually not even any effort expended on their own part) because they are "entitled". Most of those programs are adminstrated and operated by brain dead morons who can fill out forms and barely read well enough to make decisions by "following orders" that are written down in manuals, and are paid salaries that are outrageous for the knowledge and actual work required of them each day (atypical government employees)! You cannot, because it just is not so. None of them have met the original goals they were supposedly set up to meet, yet every single one of them is constantly either getting millions more of the taxpayer dollars in budgets - OR they reduce the goals of their original mandates and the reasons they were started.

You might want to really go back and READ (if you can) the personal papers of some of those historical figures you like to group as part of your Progressive Liberal Movement today. You might find a funny thing has happened over the years ... the two parties have changed positions! This is historical fact!

Also, please show me, or guide me to the part of the Constitution, or any amendments that states anything similar to "once we get this great new country going good, we will reach a point where the government of the United States will pay for everything, for every citizen and immigrant who wants anything - so no one has to work, or be responsible for their own actions."
If you can't do this, and I KNOW you cannot - please take your Liberal Socialistic Progressive friends and move to a country who claims they want to do this - there are many of them. By the way ... they are failing, and always will! Socialism has never worked and it never will work!

America is still a country of FREEDOMS. Either support America, or use the freedom that I and others like me, have fought (and many have died) for ... and pack your bags and liberal ways and avail yourself of the freedom to leave! The sooner you do ... the better off America will be!

Pete(Detroit) said...

Holy CRAP!!! I sleep in ONE day, and I'm totally blindsided! Not that I'm remotely a fan of Keith's in the first place (have not watched TV at home in over 2 years) but geeze, that was out of the blue.

Stilt, I think the 'why hold back' was not in.re. the troll quashing, but more along the lines of 'don't hold back, tell us how you REALLY feel'/sarc in.re. your comments about Olbermann - 'necrophiliac pedophile' has a particularly nice ring to it...
((-'pb

Bobo said...

Personally, I like it when Stilton "holds back" until the "mostly anonyomous" liberal bloggers make complete asses of themselves with the garbage they spew from their orifices, both north and south, then rams the cork in their holes, sideways with vaseline ladened sand. Just sayin...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Pete- I hadn't looked at it that way; it gets confusing with all of these anonymous posters (reminder to all: you can put in your name at the URL prompt when you're going to post).

Bobo- Actually, I appreciate liberals who post thoughtfully here, so we can actually discuss things. Jack at least brought up talking points, and so I responded honestly and didn't make it personal.

On the other hand, if someone starts throwing down words like fascism, it's definitely sand in the vaseline time.

Proof said...

"Sand in the vaseline" - sounds like a good name for a rock group!

Bobo said...

I also enjoy good talking points. I just don't care for the "let's throw everything against the wall and see what sticks" messages. A lie becomes the truth if it is told often enough to ignorant people. Fortunately, by posting here they are trying to spread the lie to those who aren't ignorant.

drjim said...

Go get 'em, Stilt!

Rick said...

I hear he is getting a better job then MSNBC -it's working for a pre-school newspaper. He interviewed for a high school newspaper but they have standards.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Bobo- Liberal/Progressive talking points always tend to break down when the discussion gets into specifics like cost, efficacy, and unintended consequences. And the last plaintive cry of the liberal is usually "yes, but we meant well."

Dr.D said...

You are becoming as vile and disgusting as the Democrats. That is really disappointing. Your humor used to be funny; now it is simply sickening. Think about the direction you are going, please.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Dr.D- I'm genuinely sorry you were offended, but you're sort of missing the parfait-style layering of today's cartoon/commentary.

Yes, the remarks were "as vile and disgusting" as the Democrats and, more specifically, as vile and disgusting as Keith Olbermann's unending attack on conservatives. The man said poisonous, untrue, and unsubstantiated things as regularly as he inhaled and exhaled...and so it seemed appropriate to use his own stylistic tools to describe his exit from the public eye. At least, that was my intent. So paradoxically, I agree with you (and that was the point of the cartoon).

And while humor is in the eye of the beholder, if you look at other recent cartoons you'll see that I'm definitely not skewing either the visuals or commentary toward the crude and coarse. That's a cheap way to try to get a laugh, and a useless way to try to shape opinions.

I hope you'll stick with the blog and find future cartoons more to your liking.

Necron99 said...

Dr. Jarlsberg... Thank you for everything; the cartoons, commentary, and crystalline grasp of our current events... Please continue to soldier on for the sake of all of us that appreciate the hard work and patience you display when dealing with these wretched cretins (both in the public spotlight & randomly spewing vile in your blog).

Anonymous said...

That second panel is crude and tasteless.

Chuck said...

John the Econ said... But really, where does one go after MSNBC?

Wow, my thoughts exactly!!!

Pete(Detroit) said... I sleep in ONE day, and I'm totally blindsided!

Me too ... I sure didn't see this coming.

Stilton, I believe I echo the thoughts and feelings of most (if not all) of your regular readers (including the lurkers): THANKS!!! I appreciate what you do. I thought the Olbermann send-off in the Olbermann style was both appropriate AND funny!

The only disagreement I have is with your statement: "Which is proof that prayer works". I don't wish to silence the rabid left. They bring clarity to the discussion. I always knew the correct side of any argument if I knew which side Keith Olbermann was on!

Earl said...

Anonymous above re: the second panel being crude and tasteless. Yes, and delightfully so. And that's why you have the third panel. Stilton. You made your point adroitly, as usual.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Readers- Thanks for the nice words! And for the squeamish, let me promise you that tomorrow's cartoon isn't crude or vile in the least and - as a special Sunday Funnies bonus - will even be in color.

JustaJeepGuy said...

Maybe Jack (5th post) thinks that Social Security and Medicare and such are successes simply because they haven't collapsed yet. When they do, as all Ponzi schemes do, will he change his tune? Probably just as soon as Baracky Fife does...I won't be holding my breath.

Bruce said...

Your website has become a daily read of mine. Today's commentary (starting at the 3rd paragraph) could have easily come from the NY Times or the LA Times had the subject in question been Hannity or O'Reilly.

79firebirdman said...

Good bye and good riddance. For now. He will land somewhere and continue spewing propaganda and lies with the rest of his libturd ilk.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

It's not like there's any shortage of progressive clowns at which to laugh, but he was one of the most unintentionally funny. Well, we'll always have Schultz, right?

John the Econ said...

Jack, where does one start with you? First of all, there can be no such thing as "health care rights", since for health care to be a right, it would have to be taken from someone else first.

And anyone who'd argue that the Ponzi scheme that is called Social Security has been a success is just a fool. If you were born after 1960, you're likely to find out in a most painful way if you are at all expecting it to be there to support you in any way.

Necron99 said...

It's obvious that Jack don't know 'Jack' about reality.

Anonymous said...

@John the Econ "for health care to be a right, it would have to be taken from someone else first"

Please square that with the Second Amendment. Who loses their right to bear arms each time someone exercises theirs?

Sherrie Schtenlustengarten

JustaJeepGuy said...

Ms. Schtenlustengarten, for health care to be a "right", that means that someone has to provide that care, i.e., a doctor. If health care is a "right", the doctor can't expect to get paid for the care provided, and the doctor no longer has a right to NOT provide that care. The doctor is then essentially a slave. All other rights are prevented from infringement by the government as stated in the Bill Of Rights--including the rights not specified (hence the 10th Amendment).

The point is, no one has a "right" to force someone else to do something, which the mistaken notion of a "right" to health care implies.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

JustaJeepGuy- Good answer. There can be NO "right" granted which takes from another, as you point out. Although now that Obama is declaring that abortion is a "right," I might have to change that definition...because obviously you can't give someone an abortion without someone else having everything (past, present, and future) taken from them.

Dave in FL said...

Where does he go from MSNBC? I heard that The Onion is becoming a cable TV show ... might as well make up "news" where it really counts!

Kel said...

Olberdork is gone....now Messnbc is creating a new prime time line-up.aka ..rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic..Sgt. (Ed) Schultz is next.