Saturday, April 10, 2010

The Great Negotiator

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Barack Obama just signed a treaty with Russia to reduce the size of the US nuclear arsenal, and cease development of any new American nuclear weapons. Of course, you don't give all that
away without getting something substantial in return...which is why Russia has said that they "can not rule out that the UN Security Council will not revisit the question of (Iranian) sanctions."

Translators are still trying to figure out what this means in English, but in the interim the president is simply thrilled with his own accomplishment, calling the Russian statement "an enormous shift" in policy.

There is, however, a little sticking point that the president is more reluctant to talk about. While Russia might agree, in principle, to perhaps reconsider the possibility of maybe discussing sanctions, they have made it exceedingly clear that they won't accept an embargo of refined oil products to Iran...which is widely believed to be the only sanction which Iran might actually care about.

In other words, Iran will remain free to develop nuclear weapons...while the United States is forbidden from doing the same thing.

We're not entirely sure why the president believes this to be a great diplomatic victory, but we'll have the translators keep working on it...

Friday, April 9, 2010

Big Frog, Small Pond

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Longtime Whitehouse correspondent Helen Thomas (George Washington referred to her as the "olde woman in scarlet in the front row") is complaining that the downsizing of "old media" may result in journalism that is "less reliable" than what she's helped spoonfeed the public.

And she's right in the sense that oldschool, mainstream media really can be relied get the story wrong. A recent study shows that only 29% of Americans think that journalists get their facts straight, and only 26% of Americans think the mainstream media is politically unbiased.

Still, rather than having a bunch of "citizen journalists" using computer technology to bring stories (especially conservative stories) to light, Helen thinks the American people would be better served by relying on good old-fashioned presidential press conferences. Unfortunately, the president of "transparency" has refused to give such a press conference for over nine months now.

That's long enough for a woman to have a baby. Or, and we don't want to name any names, several thousand tadpoles.

"Gibbs-it! Gibbs-it! Gibbs-it!"

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Famous Last Words

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Liberal lexicographers have been cracking their knuckles and getting up to new mischief in the Obama Whitehouse. Previously, they've declared that the 9/11 attacks weren't acts of terror, but were instead a "man-caused disaster." Similarly, there is no "war on terror," but only "overseas contingency operations."

Seizing the fierce urgency of inanity, the Obama administration is now floating the idea that the words "Muslim" and "Islamic" must be struck from strategic documents, and no terrorists will be described as being Muslim or Islamic, no matter which deity's name they were shrieking when they self-detonated.

Let's be clear: the war on terror has never been a "war on Islam," and only the intellectually lazy would judge an entire faith based on the actions of its worst and most radical elements.

But words mean something, and failing to identify Islamic terrorists as Islamic shows a continuing and dangerous lack of seriousness on the part of this president. Failing to acknowledge the common thread among terrorist attacks effectively prevents our intelligence and security officials from identifying or acting on any threats that are larger than the actions of individuals.

You can't "connect the dots" if you insist that they're only dots.

Wednesday, April 7, 2010

No Nukes Is Good Nukes

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Barack Obama has just announced his new "Nuclear Posture Review" for the United States. And the posture is, pretty much, to grab our collective ankles.

The review explicitly lays out the rules for anyone who wants to attack the United States without worrying about getting nuked in return. Poison gas? No problem! Cropdusters with anthrax? Bring it on!

The president's reasoning seems to be that there will be less incentive for rogue states to acquire nuclear weapons if we assure them that they can use non-nuclear weapons on us in relative safety. No, really!

In Obama's land of unicorns and rainbows, a world with fewer nukes is a wonderful place to live, even with the occasional smallpox attack or water system spiked with cyanide. Whether that will be true in the real world is something we just became much more likely to find out...

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Once Upon a Time Magazine

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To help grease the skids for Barack Obama's proposed "Cap and Trade" carbon dioxide tax, Time Magazine published an article called "Putting a Price Tag on the Melting Ice Caps." Predictably, they estimated the damages to be so astronomically high that the president's intent to downsize American industry while pumping trillions out of the economy seems like a bargain.

There's just one problem: the same day Time's scare piece hit the stands, researchers announced that arctic ice was actually growing dramatically, owing to "unusually cold weather."

Also "growing dramatically" is the scientifically-supported opinion that man-caused Global Warming / Climate Change is a myth.

The Democrats' "Healthcare Reform" was never about healthcare, and always about redistribution of wealth. Similarly, "Cap and Trade" is not about energy or the environment, but is also about redistribution of wealth. It is an ambitious and all-encompassing strategy of "Stealth Socialism," attempting to fly under America's radar.

And that should put a chill up enough spines to assure that the ice caps will never melt.

Monday, April 5, 2010

A Yen for Chinese

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The Whitehouse has decided to delay a report which labels China a "currency manipulator," after fears that it could touch off a trade war.

China's currency manipulation currently undermines US exports, depresses our GDP, and leeches jobs from the American economy...all of which are very bad things. But standing up to China would involve...well...standing up, which doesn't come naturally to a president whose first instinct would be to bow to Burger King.

Of course, it's hard to stand up to someone if you owe them money...and we currently owe China over $776 billion, which has been borrowed to finance our ever-metastasizing social programs. That's over $10,000 for every working family in America.

And unfortunately, as long as China is free to manipulate our currency, there will be fewer working families every year.

Sunday, April 4, 2010

The Easter Funny

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Barack Obama's poll numbers have hit an all-time low, causing a usually secular mainstream media to pray for their resurrection. Here's a hint for the newscasters: don't hold your breath. Or, better yet, do.

Happy Easter to all, from Hope n' Change!