Friday, November 4, 2011

Take This Job And Cubit

Although Barack Obama has aligned himself with those who are against profit, he seemingly has no problem declaring himself to be a prophet. Or so it seemed when he recently lashed out at congressional Republicans (and, oh yeah, virtually all of the Democrats) for voting to reaffirm "In God We Trust" on our nation's currency.

"In God We Trust is not putting people back to work," quoth the Prophet Obama. "I trust in God, but God wants to see us help ourselves by putting people back to work!"

It was just a bit unclear how people "help themselves" by waiting for the
government to put them to work, but of course Barack Obama works in mysterious ways and has an unseen plan which we can not (and do not) fathom.

And the president's revelation also begs the question of what sort of jobs God would want to steer people towards. High-speed arks? Renewable energy from burning bushes? The development of diet-friendly low-sodium pillars of salt? And if God is keenly interested in job-creating, is he really likely to entrust the job to politicians?

Moreover, it's curious that God is spending so much intimate one-on-one time speaking to Obama these days, after the president's Guinness World Record achievement of attending Jeremiah Wright's church for 20 consecutive years without listening to a single sermon.

Still, Whitehouse spokesman and noted biblical scholar Jay Carney declares it was fair for Barack Hussein Obama to invoke the name of God when attacking Republicans because the Bible says "The Lord helps those who help themselves." Only the Bible
doesn't contain those words...though this misunderstanding might explain why so many in the Obama administration believe in "helping themselves" to our money.

The president says his big problem with the vote to reaffirm "In God We Trust" is that the Republicans
should have been trying to create jobs instead of wasting the country's time.

Of course, those same Republicans had already offered up 15 job-creation bills... but
every one of them was shot down by the president's own Democrat-led senate.

We might not be theological experts...but that truly strikes us as a sin.

The first time Jeremiah Wright said "God Damn" in front of the congregation.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Oh Baby, Oh Baby

The increasingly unruly "Occupy Earth" movement took a huge step this week when it added the7 billionth person to its membership roles.

The demands of the most recent members of the group are much the same as those of smaller "occupy" groups currently inhabiting public parks: they want
someone to give them food, clothing, and shelter and won't take "no" for an answer.

The United Nations - which seems to have
way too much time on its hands - officially certified the "7 billionth person" number despite vigorous ongoing efforts from the Obama administration to forcibly evict many of the young occupiers from their mother's wombs.

But despite uncomfortable weather extremes, lack of access to clean water, shortages of food, and the occasional outbreak of hostilities, the "Occupy Earth" crowd claims they are "here to stay" and "not going anywhere."

actually, they just cried and pooped themselves...but we're pretty sure it's what they meant.


Monday, October 31, 2011

Close One

Here at the editorial offices of Hope n' Change Cartoons, we're big enthusiasts for Halloween (which, in these politically correct times, is more properly referred to as "Redistribution of Fattening, Subsidized Corn Syrup-Based Corporate Products Day").

And of course, it's also a big day at the Whitehouse - because no one knows more about wearing a mask to get what you want than Barack Obama.

To celebrate, Barack and Michelle gave out treats on Saturday - which was more convenient for them than waiting until, oh, Halloween - despite the fact that bitterly cold rain and snow fell on the kids paraded for the first couple's photo-op.

The president looked out over the shivering tots and said, "You guys doing alright? It's not ideal out here. Let's give out some candy!" Which is, of course, what his teleprompter has been telling him to say for years now.

Each child received a box of M&Ms with a presidential seal (hello, Ebay!), a butter cookie in the shape of the Whitehouse (hello, Weightwatchers!) and, to ensure fond childhood memories of our gracious and generous first lady, a baggie of dried fruit.

But all too soon, the magical festivities were over and Barack Obama again turned his thoughts from All Hallow's Eve to All Hollow Promises...and making sure taxpayers are the ones left holding the bag.

In any event,
HAPPY HALLOWEEN from Hope n' Change Cartoons - and remember to be generous tonight when scary-looking young people appear at your door demanding goodies.

Unless they've got drums, in which case they're probably members of Occupy Wall Street.


BONUS: Want some frightening art for this (or next) Halloween? Click here for a printable sized version of this scary Whitehouse Halloween painting!

BONUS #2: And don't forget the Hope n' Change Halloween videos! Great for sharing with friends or liberals on Facebook!