Friday, October 5, 2012

Friday Free For All

Bark Obama got licked in the big dog fight

Readers- It's another "Free For All Friday" with bits and pieces of things which I've created in the past 24 hours or so while enjoying the lamentations of the Left following the first Presidential Debate. I'll also admit that this is at least slightly due to the fact that I received a notice today that the price of my health insurance was being raised yet again - this time by about $4000 - and so I'm just a wee bit distracted by the urgency of either finding another plan or prying out my gold fillings to sell for cash. Thanks, Obamacare!

But aside from that, Mrs. Lincoln, I'm in a pretty good mood. And so is Joe Biden, who is a little unclear on how the transition of executive power actually works...

Meanwhile, Barack Obama's handlers have told him to bring his best game to the next debate. Unfortunately, they've forgotten that his best game is golf...

And finally, I was almost sorry for the torment Chris Matthews was feeling after watching Wednesday's debate. And by "almost sorry," I mean that I was ecstatically happy to see his apoplectic misery. And it's a pleasure I look forward to again in the near future, now that MSNBC has figured out a way to force Matthews to watch the next debate...

Have a great weekend!  -Stilt

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Special Bulletin: Debate Update!

It's official: Mitt Romney crushed Barack Obama in the first debate.  Mitt was strong, personable, had complete command of the facts, and radiated leadership.  Barry looked stressed, petulant, gave rambling and seemingly meaningless answers, and spent a lot of time making unhappy faces while staring down at his podium (he was clearly afraid to make lasting eye contact with Mitt).

And if you think I'm cheering Mitt's performance just because I allowed myself a sip or two of scotch when it became clear which way the wind was blowing, just check out Chris Matthews' apoplectic meltdown in the minutes immediately following the debate. I guarantee you that he needed to change his adult diapers at the next commercial break.


Squeak Up

Barack Obama is asked why he lied about Benghazi terror attact

Tonight's the night that millions of people of all ages, all income levels, and all ethnicities will be turning on the television to pay rapt attention to an unflinching, no-holds-barred look at the nightmarish problems and challenges currently shaping America and the dismal prospects for our future.

We are referring, of course, to "Here Comes Honey Boo Boo." 

But political junkies may prefer tuning in to the first of the Presidential Debates, during which Barack Barry Hussein Soetoro Obama will be asked what kind of ice cream he likes, and challenger Mitt Romney will be asked to give the exact value of Pi to the thousandth decimal, while dodging thrown vegetables, livestock, and quite possibly small arms fire from the debate moderator.

Which is a great pity, because there are a lot of important questions which desperately need straight answers from this president - and we doubt many will be asked.

• Why is the president using executive privilege to cover up who in his administration is responsible for the bloody "Fast & Furious" massacres? And how does he feel about yet another border agent being murdered by the kinds of people he's been giving guns to?

• Exactly who, outside of the president's immediate family, political cronies, and Sandra Fluke's parade of boyfriends is better off than they were four years ago?

• Why is the price of health insurance and healthcare treatment going up for almost all Americans when the president promised Obamacare would bend the cost curve downward?

• When the president tells Russia he'll have "more flexibility" after the election, what exactly does that mean - and why doesn't he want voters to know about it now?

• Why did the president tell the world that the attack in Benghazi was not terrorism when he knew that it was? Why hasn't he even initiated an investigation to find those who murdered our Ambassador and Navy Seals? Followup question: Did the president really think killing Bin Laden was the same as defeating Al-Qaeda?

• Why is the president against school choice, considering it is poor minority communities who are hurt worst by our current school system?

• Why hasn't the president asked the Democrat Senate to produce even one budget during his entire first term? And why is the Commander-in-Chief ready to accept crippling cuts to the military budget because his alleged "supercommittee" couldn't find any budget cuts acceptable to the president's party?

• What steps is the president taking to prevent going over the fiscal cliff in approximately 90 days, raising taxes across the board and, according to every expert, forcing this country into a new and deeper recession?

• What's the f*cking deal with all the golf?!

We doubt that these or similarly important questions will get asked. And no matter what the queries are, Obama will throw up (so to speak) a cloud of lofty, rhetorically impressive, and thoroughly meaningless words until his little "time's up" light comes on.

Although frankly, we think that light came on almost four years ago.

Play along during the debate, America! You could lose another trillion dollars!

Monday, October 1, 2012

Reign Turning To Drizzle

Eager voters wait in line to cast ballots against the worst jug-eared president since the earth was a cooling ball of gas

Looking at today's news is, frankly, heartbreaking.  The 2000th (nearly unheralded) military death in Afghanistan...more violence across the Middle East...the collapsing US dollar...the Whitehouse coverup of the entirely predictable and entirely successful Benghazi terrorist attack...taxpayer money going to the Muslim Brotherhood...taxpayer money going to "Obamaphones"...16 young partygoers in Mexico slain with "Fast & Furious" guns...and on and on and on.

But what was perhaps the most troubling thing in today's news was the date: October 1st.

Or, to put it more accurately, ONLY October in there's still a whole stinking month standing between us and the chance to go to the ballot box and vote out the loathsome, jug-eared, anti-American, hate-filled socialist who is currently wiping his sorry keester with our Constitution.

And frankly, that's driving us crazy here at the office towers of Hope n' Change Cartoons Unlimited. We don't want to see the new Fall TV shows and movies. We don't want to celebrate Halloween. We don't give a rat's hiney about Oktoberfest. We don't want to watch the leaves on the trees paint themselves in rich autumnal tones of orange, red, and yellow. And we especially don't want to see the First Lady demonstrating how to make Harvest apple cider by squeezing winesaps in her clawlike fists.

Oh sure, October will be the month for the debates - and those may well be crucial to finally exposing Barack Barry Hussein Soetoro Obama as the absolute failure he is, and showing people that Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan are decent, intelligent men who have the vision, desire, and talent to actually start turning this country around.

But even so, October currently feels like the old Berlin Wall - an ugly, impenetrable edifice separating us from the freedom and hope we so yearn for.

It makes us wish that Ronald Reagan could shake a commanding fist and shout: "Mr. Obamachev, tear down this month!"

Hope n' Change Cartoons will get back to our standard format on Wednesday. But today, the damnable first of October, this was what we most needed to say.

To help pass time in October, you can watch the BET Awards! Or, uh, not.

REMINDER: Today (Monday 10/1) is the last day to get your 100% free copy of "Obama Sutra" (ebook version) at Amazon com! Check Friday's cartoon and commentary (below) for additional details!