Monday, September 22, 2014

Fencing Lesson

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, white house, intruder, secret service

The Secret Service is in some not-too-secret trouble following an incident Friday in which a man with a knife climbed over the White House fence, ran 70 yards across the lawn, and then entered the White House through an unlocked front door.

Fortunately, and entirely unsurprisingly, neither the president nor his family were in the White House at the time, having left for a weekend retreat at Camp David. Not that one man with a knife could really do much damage anyway without access to ISIS's YouTube account.

Still, this breach of security raises some troubling questions. For instance, why didn't the Secret Service react immediately, why didn't the White House snipers shoot the intruder, why weren't the trained guard dogs released, and is it too freaking much to ask Barry to lock the damn front door to OUR house when he sneaks off for more golf?!

Subsequently, the president has expressed "full confidence" in the Secret Service. Then again he also had "full confidence" that Assad wouldn't use chemical weapons, that Iran would stop trying to build nukes, that Putin would leave Ukraine alone, and that Al-Qaeda was "on the run."

Interestingly, neither Obama nor the Secret Service has issued any statement that the knife-wielding intruder was not part of an evil plot by Joe Biden to take over the presidency. If you know when to read between the lines, we think that says a lot.

The intruder, Omar Gonzalez, has now been given medical care, hot meals, counseling, comfortable lodging, a Swedish massage, aromatherapy, a full complement of welfare services, permission to fly without identification or hassles from the TSA, and he'll eventually be given a comfortable home at an undisclosed location somewhere in the United States at taxpayer expense.

Only kidding! That's actually the president's "come on in, everybody's welcome" policy for the tens of thousands of illegal intruders who violate the borders and land of ordinary riff-raff Americans on a daily basis. 

Gonzalez, on the other hand, got his ass arrested all to hell and gone for walking on Barry's lawn.


Emmentaler Limburger said...

Best yet, Stilt!

Geoff King said...

Less than 24 hours later a second man also attempted to enter the Whitehouse. The Secret Service agents should all be fired since Øbama had left the building and they failed to lock him out.
On the side of fairness and political correctness, a petition has been started on the White House website to allow Mr. Gonzalez permanent residency in the building he gained access to. Being an apparent migrant worker, he deserves the same amnesty and government handouts as all the other illegals that Øbama has allowed to walk into our country:

Geoff King said...

So evidently if you succeed in gaining entry to the White House while carrying a weapon, like Mr. Gonzalez, it is treated as a minor incident. However if you accidently make a wrong turn in front of the White House, like Miriam Carey, you will be hunted down and murdered in cold blood in front of your child.

TrickyRicky said...

@Geoff King(2)- 100% correct, plus a standing ovation in Congress to celebrate your executioners.

Wahoo said...

Perhaps Mr. Gonzalez' sole intention was to rummage through Moochel's underwear drawer. Appears to me they're both the same size.

Sunnybrook Farm said...

The guy should have run on to a golf course instead of trying to find obama anywhere near the oval office where he would have to do work.

Jim Hlavac said...

I noticed a petition has been started to let the man stay in the White House -- wouldn't that be cruel and unusual punishment?

But, I think the reason the man was not stopped right away was because he had yelled "fore!" before crossing the green ... and the Secret Service were so used to the term that they thought someone was playing through ...

Judi King said...

Well Geoff, thanks for remembering Miriam Carey! What kind of a double standard is this? Personally, I would have been cheering Mr. Gonzalez on. The chances of finding our leader home are next to nothing, so what's the big deal?

Bruce Bleu said...

Stilt, you silly wabbit, that guy was just delivering some LUNCH to lamont, (albeit, LATE). The media didn't report the tureen of Klan Chowder he had with him! (Well, HELL... everything ELSE odd or unusual is racism... why not FOOD too!)

It's No Gouda said...

Whoops! The dangers of jumping to conclusions. A story in today's paper has some additonal info on Mr. Gonzalez.
Seems he is a Gulf War veteran with PTSD who has been wandering the country and living out of his truck for the past couple of years. The "weapon" in question is, according to family members, a small folding pocket knife. Family did say Gonzalez did have access to deadlier weapons and the knowledge and training to use them had he wished to do so.

Colby Muenster said...

Breaking News! After hours of heated questioning, Omar Gonzalez finally admitted the real reason he tried breaking into the Obama's private quarters. He stated that he was merely trying to find the legendary room of mirrors where Barry goes to worship.

When asked to comment, President Obama said, "I'm just relieved he didn't make it in and find my favorite 'worship vibrator.' It's been in my family for years."

Geoff King said...

I believe the Legendary Room of Mirrors is right next to the Lingerie Fitting Room which is, of course, in the opposite wing from the First Lady's Fitting Room and Dominatrix Chamber.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Emmentaler- Kind of you to say so!

@Geoff King- I'm in favor of letting Gonzalez stay. If we have to accept all those who illegally cross our borders, why shouldn't Barry?

Regarding Miriam Carey, the (ahem) "experts" say that the erratic behavior which caused her death was due to postpartum depression. Another example of how an abortion might have saved the mother's life. At least in the minds of Progressives.

@TrickyRicky- In fairness, it's always a good idea to applaud those who are well-armed, at least until you can dive for cover.

@Wahoo- And quite possibly the same sex.

@Sunnybrook Farm- That does seem to be the obvious flaw in his otherwise crafty plan...

@Jim Hlavac- Either that, or he was carrying a golf bag and claiming to be the president's ball washer.

@Judi King- The big deal is that, unlike those scattered around our southern border, the fences around the White House are actually guarded.

@Bruce Bleu- Would that be Klan Chowder with Oyster KKKrackers?

@It's No Gouda- Actually, I sympathize with Gonzalez. It doesn't sound like he was waving a knife around, and instead he only wanted to call Barry's attention to what he (Gonzalez) believed was an urgent problem: "the collapse of the atmosphere."

Apparently Gonzalez heard "voices" warning of this impending calamity. Of course, we've ALL heard those voices - they belong to Obama, Al Gore, Hillary, and John Kerry.

@Colby Muenster- I'm glad you only said that the vibrator has been "in the family" for years, without specifying how far "in the family."

@Geoff King- This explains all of the emergency canisters of eye wash and brain bleach hung in the halls.

Ron Lyster said...

Hmm.... Here's a fellow who actually DID get into the White House. Anyone remember Miriam Carey? An unarmed woman riddled with bullets.

Anonymous said...

Remembet that time Reagan got shot?

Pretty hilarious. A lot of people made fun of that too as I recall.

Judi King said...

Apparently GUARDED fences don't make much of a difference, especially when there's nothing to guard.

rickn8or said...

"Perhaps Mr. Gonzalez' sole intention was to rummage through Moochel's underwear drawer."

Had he succeeded, it would have been the classic example of simultaneous crime and punishment.

Judi King said...

@ Anonymous.....since no one in this discussion got shot except that poor innocent women, Miriam Carey, what's your point?

PRY said...

Stilt, that was one top-notch gag today, first-class stuff!

The voters DID put him you say...twice!
And that fact, my friend, is the main thing, and maybe the only thing that gives me a bit of unease as we approach the mid-terms! Usually, many more voters stay home on election day rather than vote for some 'boring' congressman or judge...let us hope that is the case this year also, as I feel the right is more than motivated than ever to take a positive step in taking back our nation by taking over the Senate and bounce Harry Reid out of his powerful position!

John the Econ said...

Meanwhile, the "Occupy" nuts are back, this time over "global warming", which hasn't been happening for the last decade-and-a-half. This afternoon, they were assaulting the evil capitalists at the NY Stock Exchange. Oblivious to their own reality, these activists demanding that corporations do something about "climate change", they were having pizza delivered, and most were equipped with smartphones.

Yeah, these are people to take seriously as they fight for a low-carbon existence similar to that enjoyed by the citizens of North Korea.

In other news, the parents of Micheal Brown have hit the road on the obligatory "No Justice, No Peace" tour.

My favorite quote from his mother: "He was just an average teenager."

...who behaves like a thug, commits strong-arm robberies, and struts down the middle of the street with a sense of entitlement afterwards.

This is where I really feel sorry for "minority" Americans, who are struggling to raise their children not to be thugs, but then have to have their entire lot downgraded by the likes of the Brown family and their race-hustler handlers. So they're the ones calling Micheal Brown the "average" African-American male.

And they call us the racists!

Oh, and it seems that 3 native Afghan soldiers who were brought to the US for "training" have disappeared after visiting a mall. Authorities are concerned that they lost track of them, but are not "alarmed" by it, even though ISIS has already stated that this is their strategy for attacking America.


American Cowboy said...

And another story I just saw states that there were over 800 rounds of ammunition in the vehicle of the fellow who got into the White House.

Now I wonder how long it took for the powers-that-be to count them, and then plant them?

Geoff King said...

Face it fellow patriots. We are in the midst of an orchestrated take down of everything that made our country great and exceptional. Future generations will most likely look back on what the USA stood for, and will wonder and lament on how we possibly allowed it to be destroyed in the name of political correctness, while knowing that the supposed enemies of our republic were in fact created, funded, and armed by our very own government in order to remove our Constitutional rights and thereby take total control of our lives in the name of "Homeland Security". At this point, nothing short of a Civil War has any chance of restoring our once great nation, and the likelihood of that occuring and being successful is next to nothing. I deeply regret the loss of what was once the greatest country in human history.
May she rest in peace.

Pamecon said...

Hahahahaha! Good one

Why's the border open, but the WH gets the GD gate treatment?

"Stop the Hate". tear down the Gate"

Pamecon said...

These outrageous and frightening incidents shred all Democrat credibility if they fraudulently to try to pin REAL attempts on the president and his family on the "Tea Party" and "the Christian Right" down the road.

This is "the Administration that couldn't shoot straight!" -- or Lock a Front Door!!!!

John the Econ said...

Now watching Bill Clinton stump for corporate tax reform. Definitely moving to differentiate Hillary as a "moderate" from Obama's far-left tax-every-to-hell agenda.

Colby Muenster said...

@John the Econ,
HRC is still saying she's not made up her mind about running for Resident of the United State. Is ANYBODY really buying that crap? Who else do the lofo's have? Psycho Joe? Nanny Bloomturd? Nanny from San Franny? Of course, they could always tap one of the three John's; Kerry, Boehner or McCain. Fine Democrats all.

As much as I can't bear the thought of 4 more years of the Clinton bullshit machine, it would still be a slight improvement over the current POS occupying OUR property at 1600 PA Ave. How friggin' pathetic is THAT? At least three Dollar Bill could make a damn decision now and then and stick to it (or is that "put his stick in it?").

Maybe we'll get lucky, and the old bag will have a heart attack and croak before 2016.

Bah.... time for coffee....

John the Econ said...

@Colby Muenster, the difference between the Clintons and Obama is that the Clintons were merely corrupt, and in the game for the power, prestige and affluence, whereas Obama is in it because he's a true believer in the Marxist cause.

Of the two, I consider Obama more dangerous as an individual, since he really doesn't care about the well-being of the economy or individuals in general. At least the Clintons understand that in order to fleece the economy, there has to be an economy to fleece in the first place. So if our current tax regime chokes corporate America to the point to where they feel compelled to leave these shores, there's little in that for the Clintons. who are currently thriving with hundreds-of-millions of corporate cash being bestowed upon them in the name of "charity".

Judi King said...

@ John the Econ...I think you've hit the nail on the head with your analogy of the two (or three) politicians. Our ruler cares only about himself.

Wahoo said...

@ Emmentaker Limburger, I agree and rate it 10 (out of 10) O'Bama latte salutes.