Monday, March 16, 2015
As if Hillary Clinton's lifeless, laughable excuses for her email scandals weren't bad enough, there's increasing talk that presidential puppet-master Valerie Jarrett is actually orchestrating the attack on the former Secretary of State. It's like one of those nature documentaries in which a scorpion is squaring off with a rattlesnake; it's hypnotically fascinating to watch, and you hope they'll both lose.
But with Hillary looking (at least temporarily) wounded and woeful, who do Democrats have waiting in the wings to possibly take her place? Right now, the choices seem to boil down to a Native American and a Naive American...
Senator Elizabeth "More Beads for Minimum Wage" Warren claims not to be running for president, and she's making that claim in front of every camera and potential voter she can find. If she is successfully drafted as a candidate, she is expected to run on a populist campaign of strengthening the middle class by making it legal for them to open casinos and sell tax-free cigarettes after they've had "cheekbone lifts" courtesy of Obamacare.
Also in the running (and just as reality-impaired) is VP Joe Biden, who recently appeared on an HBO program called "Our Rising Oceans" and declared that disbelief in manmade global warming is akin to denying gravity.
"Gimme a break, man," said Biden (according to an unofficial transcript) "Gravity is the real deal. You're gonna question something invented by Newton? God bless ya, this is the guy who figured out how to put figs in cookies!"
In summary, it's going to be a long, long campaign season.