This week, Barack Obama asked Congress for additional military authorization to degrade ISIS but, as in the case of "Fifty Shades of Grey," it's not entirely sure yet who's actually going to get a spanking.
For those who may not know (i.e., conservatives) "Fifty Shades of Grey" is a film based on a best-selling erotic novel in which women are shamed, punished, shackled, spanked, and tortured - and they freaking love it. As do the millions of randy readers and progressives who claimed to be outraged by the far less degrading mischief at Abu Ghraib.
But returning to the president's "Fifty Shades of Fail" strategy, his request for new military powers contains some odd language which practically sounds like he's begging to have his hands tied (or handcuffed, if that's closer to his fetish). Specifically, he wants Congress to sign off on statutory language which "does not authorize the use of the United States Armed Forces in enduring offensive ground combat operations." Wow, take that ISIS!
But he also wants language stating that "the use of military force shall terminate (in three years) unless reauthorized." In other words, our kinky commander-in-chief is up for a little playful pain, suffering, and masochism but only if he can first establish a "safe word" which will get him out when he's had enough.
As if all of this wasn't depressing enough, the president (in a recently televised interview) is still describing ISIS as a bunch of non-Islamic "violent zealots" killing "random folks."
Clearly, B. Hussein enjoys wearing a blindfold - but Hope n' Change would never ever ever suggest that it's because he gets an erotic thrill out of it.
Although, it might help explain how he was able to father children.
BONUS: Calendar Girl
Damn those Gregorians!
