Wednesday, August 24, 2016

Black Lies Matter

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, hillary, email, colin powell, fbi, lies
If, by some technological miracle, a way was found to use Hillary Clinton's inexhaustible lies as fuel to produce energy, our world would never run out of power. Forget oil, coal, and nuclear - we wouldn't even need the sun anymore.

As the latest case in point, when explaining her private email server to the FBI, Hillary claimed that former Secretary of State Colin Powell told her at a party that she should use a private server, said that he used private email while in office, and it made everything better in every way!

In other words, Hillary was telling the FBI that if they had problems with her email server, they also had problems with a black person. And that's racist!

Or would be if there was an iota of truth to Mrs. Clinton's tale - but according to the none-too-pleased Colin Powell, there isn't.  While he did use private email for some non-critical correspondence as Secretary of State, he never had a private server - and never used anything but the official State Department servers for classified materials.

Moreover, he says he has no recollection whatsoever of talking about email systems to Hillary at that party, but does recall that "she was using it (her personal email server) for a year before I sent her a memo telling her what I did [during my term]." He also says of the current scandal that "her people have been trying to pin it on me." Wow! Where are Black Lives Matter when we really need them?

Theoretically, giving false testimony to the FBI constitutes a felony. Unfortunately, neither felonies nor the FBI hold any terror for the Democratic presidential candidate because she apparently has lurid blackmail photos of James Comey diddling roadkill or, perhaps, Loretta Lynch.

Then again, maybe all of this is just a huge misunderstanding. Maybe when the FBI asked her where she got the cockeyed idea for the private email server, they only thought she said Colin Powell when she actually muttered that the idea was pulled out of her "colon...bowel."

Considering her gift for lying her ass off, at least that would have been believable.

BONUS: DRIP DRY
obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, louisiana, flood, vacation, asshole
Snopes confirms this is true.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

Curious that with Trump offering the idea that the black voter has nothing to loose given the decades long record of Democratic Party malfeasance in support of lifting the black community out of poverty... that Obama selects a solidly middle class black community for his flood photo op. Spotlighting achievement in the black community must have been seen as more important than the traditional flood photos which, shockingly, usually involve something wet.

REM1875 said...

Snopes? Snopes ? I actually believe sHrillary more than I do snopes.

And allow me to explain Colon Powell lost his race as do most African Americans when he put the (R) behind their name.
I can't explain it but I am sure the media can.
Just like how gay people get their gay card pulled if they get CAUGHT being a pedophile (except for Harvey Milk he is still gay)
The media will have to explain this but most of us paying attention know this is how it works. So even though Colon is as far left as a republican can go he is no longer black, but to confuse the issue even more all the success he had as General was because he was black.
Is it all clear now?

Emmentaler Limburger said...

roadkill or, perhaps, Loretta Lynch. But you repeat yourself...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Anonymous- It did seem like Obama picked his photo-op pretty carefully.

@REM1875- Interestingly, it seems that "being black" doesn't have much to do with your actual race. Bill Clinton was, after all, widely regarded to be the first black president. Clarence Thomas? Clearly as a conservative he can't be black. Colin Powell is just plain confusing - despite that (R) behind his name, I've never seen anything remotely Republican about him. And because he's a strong proponent of affirmative action, I personally believe him to be black. But maybe that's just my white privilege speaking.

@Emmentaler Limburger- (Singing) You say to-MAY-to, I say to-MAH-to, you say po-TAY-to, I say po-TAH-to...

Rod said...

We know an older couple who lost everything (50 years worth of everything) in Baton Rouge flooding and were lucky to escape quickly. They spent the rest of the night in their car trapped on high ground. The entire neighborhood was flooded 5' deep inside one-story houses. But they are OK and in good spirits. In this short time their children assembled a work party; cleaned everything out of the house,it cannot not be saved; and the kids already bought them another house. That's Louisiana; Obama & the feds had nothing to do with it.

james daily said...

It is getting redundant that 15K new, forgotten, deleted emails surface after the State Department, FBI and whoever else gave the all clear for this serial liar and nobody seems to care but mostly, are not surprised. It is now proven that investigative journalism is as dead as the do do bird. The program now is search and destroy anyone that is conservative or has a R by their name. The lie she told on Colon is not new, she said that some time ago. With this despicable person, nothing is new or surprising. Then, the Natl Archives "lost" all the interviews on the VF suicide (?). Is that surprising? Our government shells out millions for record keeping and 0 for accountability.

Geoff King said...

Surly Clinton deserves some credit for not being noways tired when she landed under sniper fire in Bosnia and dead broke with Sir Edmund Hillary.
Meanwhile, in Minnesota, a white candidate we can all be proud of:
http://www.clickorlando.com/news/weird-news/duke-a-dog-wins-third-term-as-mayor

Mike aka Proof said...

"she apparently has lurid blackmail photos of James Comey diddling roadkill or, perhaps, Loretta Lynch." I hear it was a three way.

Dan said...

@James Daily -- Have the folks at the National Archives checked Sandy Berger's socks? Amazing what can be found there.

@REM1875 -- Harvey Milk has a US Navy ship named after him now. Hmmm. The carrier Theodore Roosevelt carries the nickname "Big Stick." Maybe the fleet oiler Harvey Milk could borrow from Saturday Night Live and take the appellation "Raging Queen." Their slogan can be "Never leave your buddies behind."

John the Econ said...

When one is a "friend" of a Clinton, one should just assume that they run the risk of getting thrown under a bus at some point should doing so prove politically expedient to the couple. In fact, getting thrown under a bus is usually the lesser penalty of crossing paths with these two.

Lies as an energy source resource: I just wish it was possible to recoup the hard costs inflicted upon society by these two. The price tag for the various investigations into them over the last quarter century must be at least a half-billion by now. Call it a "stimulus" program for the legal profession.

Speaking of investigations: It looks like we now likely know what it was Sandy Berger had shoved down his pants:

FBI files linking Hillary Clinton to the 'suicide' of White House counsel Vince Foster have vanished from the National Archives

"FBI agents' reports of interviews documenting that Hillary Clinton's stinging humiliation of her friend and mentor Vince Foster in front of White House aides triggered his suicide a week later are missing from where they should be filed at the National Archives..."

Well, isn't that convenient.

Also, "This is not the first time documents related to the Clintons have apparently vanished from the National Archive. In March 2009, the archives found that an external hard drive from the Bill Clinton White House containing confidential documents was missing."

"Offering a reward of up to $50,000 for information leading to recovery of the hard drive, the archives asked that tips be reported to the Secret Service. At the time, the archives said it had a backup drive."


Um, yeah. $50k will get it all back.

I'll be willing to bet that once Hillary officially takes office next year, a whole lot more of history will mysteriously disappear, as though it never happened. With Hillary's minions working on the inside, and the mainstream media and their Internet acolytes working on the outside, future Americans living in squalor possibly will believe that the Clintons are the 2nd coming...

Rod said...

@John the Econ: Good stuff. So she and her associates need to lose not only their national security clearances, but their library cards. When might that happen?

Anonymous said...

"....the idea was pulled out of her "colon...bowel.""

Laughed out loud at that one!!
Still laughing, in fact....
Great job!

Sortahwitte said...

The sound of my head swinging from left to right and back again. The wind whistling through my ear holes. Both palms are planted on my forehead. Stephen King has never written a story half as chilling and de-moralizing. I don't know if I'm going to wake-up screaming or in a jail cell. Probably both. The mighty tree of our republic is infested with wood borers.

chipmunk said...

I just want to know how you "accidentally" stuff something down your pants.

David in SoCal said...

I watched(with great pain and suffering) 'The Obama' giving his mini POTUS podium pontificate from a mostly black Louisiana neighborhood. During his verbal dung-slinging, he said "This is not one-off; this is not a photo op issue". I now call 'male bovine excrement' because as soon as 'The Obama' was done saying thousands of uhhhhh's/aaaaands/and inserting intellectual pauses; he started doing photo ops with the folks in the hood. The first one he did, he even coaxed a black couple over to the mini potus podium for a shot. Not narcissistic at all.

Mrs. Socal and I joined forces and donated a few hard earned American dollars to Reverend Graham's charity to help with the Louisiana relief efforts. It's the least we could do from so far away. May the Lord Bless the good people affected by this flood, and give them the strength to endure the rebuilding process.

REM1875 said...

Dan too funny - right on I am sure the white hut has strongly suggested the motto already.

Maoz said...

Dan, in your suggested motto, shouldn't there be an apostrophe at the end of the word "buddies"?

Anonymous said...

Hope & Change

Can the people be awakened, is there still enough time?

Are the powers that be frightened, intimately aware of their crime?

Can you feel the anger building, the increased rate of rage?

As people begin to recognize, their ever-shrinking cage.

Can you feel liberty shrinking, diced up into little cubes?

Courts pretend to rule, as though we're silly rubes.

Can you feel the Revolution, the ever-growing vibes?

People throwing off their chains, of blatant corruption and bribes.

Can you get the humiliation, the years of pent-up fury?

Millions rotting in prisons, no right to trial or jury.

Can you feel all the sorrow, of all this Hope & Change?

People have come to realize, their dreams were really strange.

Can you sense the switch of direction, the move towards Change & Hope?

As the crowds begin to gather, each...with a length of rope.

RJ O'Guillory