Monday, September 28, 2015

Attorney for the Worse

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, hillary, email, server, lawyers, foundation, clinton

Yesterday on Meet the Press, Hillary Clinton revealed that when it came time to sort all of her personal emails ("Dear Chelsea, can't talk now because your father is humping the help again") from her vitally important, top secret, "lives hanging in the balance" Secretary of State emails ("Dear Ambassador Stevens, I can't talk to you about Embassy security now because Bill is humping the help again"), she did the only logical thing - hired lawyers to do it for her.

So what if the lawyers didn't have the security clearance to see classified information? According to Hillary, she spent her entire time as Secretary of State without having ever received a single classified document.  Which would normally make Hope n' Change ask "then how the hell was she able to do her job?!" But then we look at the state of the world before and after her time in office and realize she wasn't able to do the job.

In what may be a journalistic first, the Meet the Press interviewer actually asked a salient follow-up question, wondering whether emails relating to the work of the Clinton Foundation ("Humping the Help to Fight Aids in Africa") would be categorized by Hillary's lawyers as "work" or "personal?"

Again, not a problem! Not only did the former first lady never have any interesting correspondence with the State Department, she claims she also never communicated with the Clinton Foundation about work-related matters! So apparently, Hillary spent years doing nothing but drinking tiny bottles of taxpayer-funded booze while flying from country to country for no particular reason. No wonder she thought she was under sniper fire when wobbling across the tarmac!

Meanwhile, Bill Clinton is blowing off (so to speak) the many accusations about his wife's highly-suspicious handling of the whole email server affair, saying that the GOP is giving her a "full-scale frontal assault."

Which, we feel compelled to point out, we doubt that Bill has done in a long, long time.


Jim Irre said...

Once again, we are subjected to a picture of the cackling old hen with her mouth wide open. She has more excuses for her abhorrent behavior than we could ever imagine. The funny thing is, her excuses would get most people in trouble as they all seem akin to admissions of guilt. But, once again, the dung rolls off her like water off a quacking duck.

And, to change the subject, I watched Scott Pelley's interview with The Donald last night. Pelley nailed it when he said Trump has been described as a "hurricane of words." Trump says he doesn't want to be a politician, that he isn't a politician. Bravo Sierra, Mr. Trump! He speaks in the generalized platitudes of a politician. All bluster, no real substance. It's taking too long for him to fade into the political back-ground. How the hell do we speed this up?

Geoff King said...

I really just wish Hillary would go away, never to be heard of again. At least she still is good for a laugh now and then, such as:
Q: What do you get when you cross a crooked politician with a crooked lawyer?
A: Chelsea Clinton

Fred Ciampi said...

Maybe the whole Clinton clan will sign up for the maiden voyage of the new Titanic and history can repeat itself........ I can only dream.

CenTexTim said...

" ... giving her a "full-scale frontal assault." "

As opposed to a sneak attack in the rear?

Joseph ET said...

Hillary is practicing her lines for the congressional hearings and the FBI interview. This is also a trial balloon to see if it flies.
She’s hoping that if she has no knowledge of anything, it gets her off the hook. She doesn’t know that in the real world (that’s the one the Clinton’s have never lived in) a person can be held responsible for the actions of their employee’s. Of course her followers will believe anything that she or Billy says as truth.
Hillary has broken numerous regulations and laws. She’s trying to spin her way out of this but, the spinning it getting her in even deeper. I guess Billy thinks the FBI is run by the Republicans. Most people think the FBI will follow the law, but then it will be up to the politicized DOJ.
Hope there is a change and she goes to jail soon.

Juanita The Icon said...


When the heck does Rod Serling step in to announce that Hillbilly & Co. is all just a bunch of televised nonsense. This TV program is really getting old. And white. And way too CPUSA née Democratic Party.

Shelly said...

Will we never be rid of the Clintons? I was so happy when his terms were over, thinking we won't have to see them anymore (much the same way I feel about the Obamas now). The truest words I have ever heard Bill Clinton speak were at his farewell address on January 20, 2001. Paraphrasing, he said "I don't know what all the fuss is, I'm not going anywhere." We have been subjected to the both of them ever since. It is beyond me how the Democrat party and their lapdog media can revere these lying, corrupt grifters. I would have been happy just to see her majesty lose the election, but now I really really want to see her go to prison where she belongs.

Regarding Meet the Press, I watched the interviews of Clinton (trying to keep my breakfast down) and Fiorina. While Chuck Todd did ask some probative questions of Clinton, his tone was reverent and cordial. With Fiorina he was combative and badgering. It should be obvious to anyone with half a brain what side he is on.

John the Econ said...

She Let Lawyers Decide Whether Emails Were Work or Personal?

Oh, that makes all the difference? So instead of doing it herself, she hired people who are both ethically and legally obligated to operate in her best personal interest to do the dirty work for her. IMHO, this absolves her of nothing, and just makes her sleazier.

And does the Clinton campaign actually think that selling the idea that Hillary shoved her dirty work off to a bunch of other dirty lawyers is going to resonate with already skeptical voters?

And kudos to Chuck Todd for having the balls and insolence to ask such a impertinent question of the anointed one. Interviews of Democrats, and specifically the Clintons are not supposed to go like that. For reasons I can't articulate, Chuck Todd annoys me, beyond the fact that he's just another ho-hum media liberal. But he just went up a step in my book.

When I ask any Clinton supporter why they do so, they usually say "Her experience". I then follow up with "With what?" Their public life has been little other than an ongoing 40-year scandal. Her short Senate career was unremarkable, other than for issuing votes that she's now totally repudiated. The Middle East literally immolated under her watch. The only thing she's been successful at is scandal control. And I think she's about to fail at that too.

A follow up on last week's topic:

Shortly after boarding his plane and leaving left the US, the Pope had this to say to reporters:

Govt. workers have right to refuse gay marriage licenses

Interesting that he chose to proclaim this on the way out as opposed to the way in. No doubt his reception by the media and Progressive elite would have been somewhat cooler had he been a bit more up-front on the topic. A week ago, the left were anticipating rainbow lights shining on St. Peter's Basilica. Today, no so much.

Again, tell me this guy isn't really a politician.

tude dog said...

"giving her a "full-scale frontal assault,."

Excuse me as I desperately try to erase that image from my mind.

Colby Muenster said...

Boy! I feel a LOT better about Hillary now that I know our national security was safely in the hands of a pack of blood sucking lawyers.

Know what's really fracking scary? Knowing that Hillary Clinton actually believes that telling us this tripe will make us feel BETTER and drop the whole "email scandal" subject. She is soooooo in touch with normal people, right?

@Joseph ET,

"Most people think the FBI will follow the law, but then it will be up to the politicized DOJ." Just an observation... The DOJ currently serves no purpose other than to further Obama's twisted agenda. I really believe that Hillary's ongoing scandal will continue to smolder, and at just the right time, BO will drop the hammer, and her glorious career (and presidential bid) will come to an abrupt and screeching halt. I think she's a goner, but the chosen replacement will be no better... maybe worse. Imagine a Biden / Obama ticket winning and us getting stuck with the little socialist prick until January 2025!! Hell, he could even have Biden "get a terminal illness" and be president again.

I need scotch....

REM1875 said...

Lizzie warren took an ax (ok it was a tomahawk)
and gave the truth 40 whacks
when she saw what she had done
she came back and gave it another 41

let us not forget she who speak with forked tongue may throw her war bonnet in the ring at anytime the demonRats need to increase their profile in the media and distract from any major disaster.
Lucky joe, 7 years of laughing at him will be erased from the collective conscience the moment he announces and he will become the smartest man in the room. The chorus of media singing his praises will be darn near as loud as heavenly host and the collective sigh of relief will sound louder than the snorting of white powder at the presidential war on drugs committee.
Then after scHillary is gone and someone else gives a 'surprise' announce that they will run, if the media still runs around looking like all edgy and bitchy like they are severely constipated it will now be becuase they are severely constipated.

Rod said...

While not in agreement with all he says and advocates I've great respect for this Pope and enjoyed his gentle reminders for whatever good they may do. His visit here also brought to mind something about Homilies; and we sure seem to be getting a lot of POLITICAL homilies from many who are not ordained for anything. Q: What does Homily and Hominy have in common? Both are corn mixed with lye.

Boligat said...


At least with hominy you can make a really good pozole.

Judi King said...

If the HillBilly were normal folks, as they claim, they would both be in prison where they belong on so many levels. Or at least indicted and tried. It will never happen because people are too afraid of them and rightly so. What is really puzzling is the morons who support either of them.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Jim Irre- As far as Hillary's supporters go, it doesn't matter if her excuses are plausible or not. They don't care. And they never will.

Regarding Trump, I haven't had a chance to see his new tax plan (released today) but I'll be shocked to my shoe soles if it's genuinely substantive and/or practicable.

@Geoff King- I'm pretty sure you wouldn't even need to rework that joke to include Webb Hubbell in the equation. Remember what Bill said to the weeping, bleeding Juanita Broaddrick after he raped her? He said not to worry about pregnancy, because a childhood case of the mumps had left him sterile.

@Fred Ciampi- As dreams go, that's not a bad one.

@CenTexTim- Considering the view, the latter approach might be preferable.

@Joseph ET- I think the FBI might conduct a legitimate investigation, but I have no faith in the DOJ at this point. Although Loretta Lynch hasn't proven herself to be the completely unethical whore that Holder was. What if - and I reveal my naivete yet again - what if Loretta Lynch is actually honest? I think I'll allow myself to cherish that fantasy for a few minutes...

@Juanita the Icon- You reminded me of this old (but appropriate) cartoon.

@Shelly- The Clintons never went away and never got any better. And I, too, am afraid that we'll be putting up with ever-present Obamas for the rest of my lifetime (the fact that I'll continue drinking too much every day Barry is in the news likely guarantees that outcome).

And yes, Todd was deferential to Queen Hillary in a way he will never be to a conservative.

@John the Econ- Adding another layer of lawyers shouldn't create distance between Hillary and guilt, but who knows anymore? Hey, Charles Manson didn't actually go out on the killing sprees he ordered - but he still went to jail. (Side note: if Hillary carved a swastika into her forehead, would anyone on the Left care?)

And I'm amazed when people cite Hillary's "experience." Let's see, she was the first lady who sneered at women who stayed home to "bake cookies," worked constantly at destroying the women in her husband's "bimbo eruptions," failed to produce records from her law firm, and engineered the disastrous HillaryCare health program without consulting a single effing doctor.

She was the senator who claimed "BUSH KNEW!" about the 9/11 attacks beforehand - largely to cover up the fact that her husband dropped the ball on grabbing Bin Laden (and staged a fake attack on an aspirin factory to obscure the nightly news stories about Lewinsky's grand jury testimony).

She was a spectacularly awful Secretary of State who can't cite a single success, has the blood of Benghazi on her hands, left much of the world in ruins, claims that she never sent or received anything classified, and probably exposed multiple secrets to hackers from every nation.

Now she claims not to know how email works, not to be involved in the work of the Clinton Foundation, and not even supportive of the positions she previously held.

If that's "experience," I'll take vanilla.

Regarding the Pope, I agree that the timing of his shout-out to Kim Davis is highly suspect.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@tude dog- You can erase the image from your mind, but can you erase the sound of Bill's voice in a darkened bedroom croaking seductively, "Hey Hillary...I got your 3 a.m. phone call right here, baby..."

@Colby Muenster- A whole pack of Hillary sycophants simultaneously tweeted "Email questions asked and answered! Time to move on!" And a lot of people will just gobble that up.

Regarding a Biden/Obama ticket, I'm not sure of the legality - and I don't want to look it up because I'm out of scotch. (Yes, I have Black Velvet whiskey - but the thought of Barry staying in the White House calls for stronger stuff.)

@REM1875- Heaven help us but a Biden/Warren ticket would be pretty formidable. Socialism, anti-capitalism, a female candidate, the Obama "legacy," and Joe running under the slogan "Have I Mentioned My Son's Deathbed Lately?"

@Rod- I certainly concur with some of the things the Pope said while here. And I found it refreshing to see so many people acting on (and acting out) their faith - even while all the political games were being played.

And good homily/hominy joke!

@Boligat- I had to look up "pozole" (apparently it's not Italian for "pustule.")

And do you know what you call ground corn that wears a straw hat and a red and white striped jacket? Barbershop hominy. (See, I TOLD you I had Black Velvet handy...)

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Judi King- It is a great mystery...

Popular Front said...

@Fred Ciampi

The guy who is supposedly building the Titanic replica is a bloated Australian oaf called Clive Palmer who is reputedly a 'billionaire mining magnate' and member of the Australian Parliament. Recent events Down Here have shown this clown to be worth a lot less money than everybody thinks; it's all on the paper money-go-round and if all his creditors ask for their money back he'll be lucky to be left with the price of a six pack.

As for the 'Titanic' thing, if it ever does get going it will end up, not as a luxury liner but probably more likely to be an aluminium runabout with a 5HP Johnson outboard, what we Aussies call a 'tinny', used for close offshore and river fishing.

Charlie Mitchell said...

As far as Hillary's supporters go, it doesn't matter if her excuses are plausible or not. They don't care. And they never will.

I also find this to be true, and it just boggles my mind.

Colby Muenster said...

I will admit, I am no constitutional law scholar, but to my knowledge, there is no law against a past president running for VP, and the 22nd amendment only talks about being "elected" president. It says nothing about succession to the presidency by the death of a sitting president.

Lord, I pray that I am woefully mistaken and also that O'Liar has not thought of the possibility.

Then again, would voters REALLY go for that ticket? I'd like to think not, but God knows people are indeed mind-bogglingly stupid.

John the Econ said...

James Taranto nailed this topic yesterday: Bill Clinton defends his wife by rewriting history.

One of the most fascinating aspects of the first Clinton era was the long-term memory deficit of the left and the media. The Clinton machine was free to re-write last week's narrative as needed for the current moment. My favorite was the frequent use of the phrase "that statement is no longer operative". It is something that was first tried during the Nixon era. It didn't work then, but for some reason it did during the Bill Clinton years. It was code for "The previous narrative wasn't working, so forget it. Here's the new one." And a pliant media would comply.

So now the Clintons have to re-write their own history again. But unfortunately for Hillary, it's 2015 and no longer 1992. I believe that Hillary has fallen victim of the "Taranto Principle", which is the phenomenon where leftist politicians are protected by a leftist media culture that shields them from reality. The leftist politicians grow comfortable in this isolated shell. But then a day comes when they are no longer protected by this shell, and are both unaware and unable to deal with the reality of their situation outside of it.

"Surely Mr. Clinton did not run for president in 1992 under the illusion that there was not going “to be a race”! It seems to us that the sense of entitlement Mr. Clinton evinces here is part of what led Mrs. Clinton to think she didn’t need to follow the rules when she was secretary of state. It was also one of the “unique reasons” that things turned out the way they did in 2008."

John the Econ said...

Slightly unrelated to Hillary: At yesterday's speech and the UN, Obama actually said "I lead the strongest military that the world has ever known. And I will never hesitate to protect my country or our allies — unilaterally and by force — when necessary," he said. "But I stand before you today believing in my core that we, the nations of the world, cannot return to the old ways of conflict and coercion — we cannot look backwards."

That left the room quaking in their loafers. Sorry Obama, after our retreat from Iraq, your "lead from behind" non-leadership, and your empty "red line" threats, nobody takes that line seriously, especially our enemies.

A lesson: In 1983, Reagan invaded the Caribbean island of Grenada as a result of a leftist coup and Soviet-Cuban militarization of the island. The invasion by the giant US of such a seemingly insignificant island was mocked by the American left. But it sent a powerful message to the Soviets, Cubans, and other potential American adversaries; The US would tolerate no further communist expansion and nonsense in the region. Everyone (outside of the American left) got the message. I argue that this is the very reason that Grenada was the Reagan Administration's only major military adventure.

Contrast that to the current Obama situation. Obama is now limited to issuing threats that nobody takes seriously. The Middle East is literally on fire. Europe is being overrun. Iran will get their bomb, and will eventually defy Obama's signature treaty. Having seen the success of Iran getting everything they want, North Korea is now making similar noises to see what they can get next.

As Bush (43) had to deal with the consequences of fecklessness of Bill Clinton, the next President will have to deal with the collateral damage from Obama's non-leadership and America's "reset" to disrespect.

Rod said...

OK, we're on a roll.
Hominy sidebars do we need to properly organize these extraneous topics?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Popular Front- Interestingly, there have been stories and pictures recently comparing the size of the Titanic to our current generation of ocean liners. Guess what - it waS tiny compared to the floating theme parks and endless buffets now on the high seas.

@Charlie Mitchell- It all goes back to the truest of Liberal truisms: it doesn't matter what you do or how it works out if you meant well. Liberals extend that courtesy to each other so they can continue to feel good about themselves, no matter what their sins or failures.

@Colby Muenster- I'd actually like to see a Clinton/Clinton ticket, if only because - knowing one another - if they actually won it would be a race to see which of them could have the other one killed first. Damn, I think we've just invented a pretty good screenplay idea...

@John the Econ- Interesting points about the Taranto Principle, and we certainly live in a different world these days than the one the Clintons enjoyed in the early 90's. Information simply can't be as neatly contained and controlled anymore because of the Internet. But like all blessings, this one is mixed: I think the Internet culture has also eroded the ability of many people to A) care about or understand complex issues or B) give a damn about anything that happened more than a week ago. Both are factors which can help the Clintons.

Regarding Barry at the U.N., the only word that the world really heard in his speech about our military force and his will to use it was: "But..." Everyone knew that whatever preceded that word, and whatever followed it, meant absolutely nothing.

@Rod- I'm concerned that if we keep up the corny (literally) hominy gags, HnC will be considered a pone site. (Thanks, you've been a beautiful audience, tip your waitresses and try the veal!)

Rod said...

(Still chuckling) OK Stilt, you got the last word.

Popular Front said...

@Stilton - that's for sure about size. Everytime I see one of those floating layer cakes I shudder to think what would happen if they were caught in a good ol' Caribbean hurricane. I'll stay with my little sailboat I think.