Friday, July 22, 2011

Head Games

The same mainstream media which has never shown any interest in Barack Hussein Obama's sealed medical records (which would include information about his childhood in an area filled with third world tropical diseases, his later use of illegal recreational drugs and, perhaps, the name of his home planet) has suddenly become obsessed with Michelle Bachmann's...headaches.

Like 10% of the population, Ms. Bachmann occasionally has severe migraine headaches, which she successfully treats with medications. In general, migraine sufferers are perfectly able to hold down jobs - even high stress jobs - and function without problem.

But the Whitehouse, the media, and even Tim Pawlenty (who should be ashamed of himself) have thrown up their hands and proclaimed that even occasional headaches should knock someone out of the running for a job in which at
any time, any day, the president must be able to respond instantly to an invitation to go golfing for a few hours.

Seriously, we're now measuring the amount of time Barack (No Medical Records) Obama spends on the golf course in
weeks...and we're worried about Michelle Bachman occasionally needing an excedrin and a cool washrag?!

But more to the point, if "pain" is the main issue here then
Hope n' Change thinks we should look at the bigger picture and vote for the candidate who inflicts the least pain on the American people. Frankly, since Barack Obama took office, we don't even know what it's like to NOT have a migraine headache. The nausea, the vomiting, the brain lava, the blood squirting from the eyes, the skin making ripping sounds as it stretches ever-tighter over a skull that's swelling like a Jiffy-Pop pan...

Ow! Ow! Ow! It's happening again! I need to go sit in a dark room and listen to Ronald Reagan speeches! ARGHHHHH!!!!!

(10 minutes later)

Okay, I'm back. It's funny how much less time it takes to get over a headache than play a round of golf. Now what was I saying? Oh yes...

I'm personally not worried about Ms. Bachmann's migraines...and frankly, I don't want to hear the subject brought up again by anyone in the media until they've demanded, and seen, Barack Obama's medical records. If health is going to be an issue in this presidential race, then it needs to be an issue that every candidate must address.

And until that time, all of this talk of
headaches is just one more media-invented pain in the ass.

Migraine "triggers" include Trillion dollar deficits, political payoffs,
soaring unemployment,"Domestic" terrorist warnings, Obamacare,
highspeed railroad boondoggles, "green jobs," and socialism.


Anonymous said...

President Thomas Jefferson had migraines so did President John Kennedy and Kennedy got us through the Cuban Missile Crisis. Emperor Napoleon Bonaparte and General William Sherman both had migraines and succeed in the most stressful environment a leader can be in: active combat. None of these men benefited from the kind of migraine treatments we have today and all of them are famous for astounding success in the most difficult situations.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

I don't know if this is the only hand the media can play against Bachmann or just the first salvo. I tend to think it's the tip of a very dirty iceberg of media attacks on her as she gains traction. Admittedly, I'm still praying for SP to jump into the fray, but if she doesn't, I find Bachmann a worthy conservative to consider.
Pawlenty should not have participated in this attack. He looks weak and needy in the effort.

John the Econ said...

Headaches? Really? This is just the beginning. Bachmann seriously scares the left, if the MSM's invective at this point is any indication. She represents almost everything the left despises, plus she's popular. As the really, really lame reasons not to vote for her like this fall flat, expect the vindictiveness to get ratcheted up in the coming months. My guess is that the ball will next get tossed to the gender-feminists to come up with reasons why she's not a "real woman".

And I think the MSM needs to be called out on their complete lack of curiosity regarding Obama's background. Obama's life is a nearly blank slate, and yet they're obsessing about Bachmann's headaches? I mean, come on! At this point in Bush's presidency, we had dramatized HBO movies in the works and fictionalized news. (Dan Rather's career, please RIP)

Come on MSM, I expect you to do better than "headaches", and I have little doubt that you will.

Meanwhile, will someone PLEASE tell Bristol Palin to shut up? She's causing mass brain-cell death out here.

Jim Hlavac said...

If one does not get headaches thinking about the problems this nation faces, then one is not thinking too hard.

Which would explain an awful lot of people.

Now, I had no headaches for five weeks as I caroused around the Northeast visiting family and friends. Quite restorative. Alas, reality returns.

Still, since it's her headaches that are the issue, or non-issue, I won't say why I would never vote for that woman without some hard rethinking.

Suzy said...

Yep its gonna be a nasty, nasty election. We haven't seen nasty until now. I just hope we as the American people can and WILL demand EQUAL treatment of all candidates including "Mr. Above-the-Rules Barry" himself.

Jazz said...

"It's that time of month again. My wife is all grouchy and I can't even touch her without risking my arm, much less just a hand. You know how it is.

"...Of course, I don't like to pay the bills, either."

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Readers- Charles Krauthammer, who should have rose petals strewn on the ground wherever he goes (not kidding - I love the guy), predicts this will be the ugliest election ever for whoever the GOP nominates. Obama has nothing to run on and so will spend up to a billion dollars on character assassination. And a billion goes especially far when so much of the media will help do the job for free.

Besides Bachmann's headaches, the media is also reporting that her husband is "rumored" to be Gay, that her church thinks it can "cure" Gays, and that her church believes that the Pope is the Antichrist. Mind you, this is the same media that couldn't care less that Obama's pastor (and "spiritual mentor") was screaching "God Damn America," and calling 9/11 "America's chickens coming home to roost."

Buy your hip-waders now,'s going to get stinky and it's going to get deep.

Anonymous said...

Which takes up more time, Headaches or an addiction to Golf? You might get one Headache a month for a few hours compared to 40 hours a month spent on the golf course. I think all liberals are bigoted migraineaphobic and that is a HATE CRIME!

John the Econ said...

@Stilton: Au contraire! Obama has much to run on, at least if you are a statist, dependent upon statists, or work on Wall Street. (Obama's current fundraising stats show him cleaning up amongst the "fat cats" he's supposedly supposed to be raping)

But you're still right. Of course, to get elected he will not be able to trumpet his statist successes, so for the rest of us his campaign will have to consist of demagoguery. Most of it will be about conservatives killing granny as they flit about on their private jets and causing oil spills. "Hope" and "Change" is so 2008.

Anonymous said...

So, liberals are aghast at the idea of a President who occasionally takes prescription medicine to mitigate the pain of migraine headaches...yet their all-time favourite President, JFK, against whom they compare all others, was a drug-addled womaniser?

Anonymous said...

"Obama has nothing to run on and so will spend up to a billion dollars on character assassination. And a billion goes especially far when so much of the media will help do the job for free."

Succinctly put, Stilton!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Anonymous (three above)- I like the term "Migraineaphobes." Wonder if we can get it to stick?

@John the Econ- Sadly, you're right. Obama has plenty to run on in terms of what he's rammed through ("stimulus" dollars, tremendous spending hikes, Obamacare, undeclared war, Muslim outreach instead of Moon missions)...he just can't run on any demonstrably good results of his policies. And sadly, he probably won't have to.

@Anonymous (above)- Even a cursory search of the Internet will show that the sainted John F. Kennedy banged a boatload of women by telling them that he got blinding headaches unless he had sex at least once a day. Therefore, at any given time, it became a woman's patriotic duty to stick her feet in the air rather than imperil the free world.

And I only wish I was making that up.

Bruce In KC said...

The Muslim outreach vs. moon missions part has me particularly steamed today....several of my friends at the Kennedy Space Center got their pink slips today.

Anonymous said...

@Bruce In KC - And now those Muslims have been setting off bombs in Norway.

Colby said...

Angry Hoosier Dad,
My oh my oh my.... what in the world will the Rachael Maddow's and Bill Maher's of the world do if SP runs in addition to Bachmann?! Is there enough mud in the world to sling? Will they have to import mud from all 57 states? From Mars? Will this be the new "shovel ready" jobs; digging mud? then again, it may confuse them so much, they won't be able to decide which one they hate the most. Maybe they will start flinging shit at each other.

Yep, a billion dollars will buy an incredibly huge shitload of mud; I hope Michelle Bachmann and the rest of our "good" candidates are building up their thick skin. This is going to get extremely ugly. There is an upside to this, though. It will be VERY easy to spot the candidate that most worries the lefties. They keep trying to convince us they are afraid of Mittenhead Romney, but you notice he is pretty much mud free so far.

Bruce In KC said...

Regarding the Muslim attacks in Norway - religion of peace, my ASS!

Bruce In KC said...

Or is it religion of Peas?

Pete(Detroit) said...

Well, I have NO idea if her husband is gay or not, but I betchya Barney Frank's boyfriend is

Then again, gay hating fundies aren't expected to be voting for Barney

jselvy said...

Don't Worry Folks.

If the Obamessiah should lose [in spite of the Chicago-style gerrymandering and ballot box stuffing], he can just declare it 'unfair' and 'Deem' it to have actually been in his favor.

I really see a Stalin style 80% of the vote or 'President for Life.' That will complete the destruction of the United States as a first world country.

robsan19 said...

Just a clarification for the Norway tragedies, they were NOT perpetrated by Muslims, but rather a disgruntled Norwegian.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@robsan19- Astoundingly, the nightmarish murders in Norway were committed by a blond, blue-eyed man who is being described as a right-wing Christian. Meaning that while the rest of us are mourning the dead and praying for the survivors, the Left in our own country will be having multiple orgasms.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

They always tell us who they fear by the intensity of their hatred and the viciousness of their attacks, especially against family and personal characteristics. God forbid they actually argue policy.
Krauthammer was beside himself with how impressed he was by Obama early on. He be-clowned himself and now tries to make up for it. His refusal or inability to see through that thin veneer engenders no confidence. I'm well done with him.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Angry Hoosier Dad- I don't recall Krauthammer being enraptured by Obama at any point, and in doing some quick checks on his writings at the beginning of Obama's presidency, I'm not finding anything that would seem to support that. But I could (always) be wrong - could you cite something that Krauthammer wrote in praise of Obama?

Or is it possible you might be thinking of Peggy Noonan? She was over the moon for the mendacious little dirtbag, and even now opines against him with clear reluctance.

Reaganite Republican said...

2 funny Stilton

Linked @ RR

Reaganite's Sunday Funnies

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Reaganite Republican- As always, my sincere thanks for the links! Readers, you should make a habit of checking out "Reaganite's Sunday Funnies" at the link above - always great stuff!