Wednesday, July 3, 2013

Happy "In De Pants" Day - Free "Obama Sutra!"

obama, obama jokes, cartoon, hope n' change, hope and change, 4th of July, obama sutra, free, stilton jarlsberg, 57 states, conservative, tea party

Since we've all been taking it "in de pants" since Barack Obama took office, Hope n' Change Cartoons is celebrating the 4th of July by giving away unlimited FREE copies of "OBAMA SUTRA - An Illustrated Guide to 57 States of Ecstasy!"

The ebook version is FREE July 3rd, July 4th, and July 5th (but please make sure that Amazon is showing the price as free before downloading), and is guaranteed to bring fireworks into your bedroom...or at least make sparks shoot out of your ears. (Note: the print edition is not free, but is dirt cheap and stunningly beautiful - perfect for leaving out on your coffee table, or slipping into the bookcase of your least favorite liberal.)

OBAMA SUTRA was painstakingly authored and illustrated by your own Stilton Jarlsberg and is pretty much what you'd expect it to be from the title: a tongue-in-cheek parody of the 2000-year old "Kama Sutra" sex manual, featuring 57 "passion positions" inspired by the words and deeds of Barack Hussein Obama.

Want to see the backbreaking gymnastics necessary to do the "Fast and Furious?" How about "Leading from Behind," "18 Holes," "The Fierce Urgency of Now," "Stimulus Package," and many, many more! And along with the 57 full-page illustrations (which are risque but not x-rated) you also get a handy glossary of the 57 news stories which inspired the cartoons. A fact-filled treasury with which you can demolish any nattering liberal who worships King Barry!

Don't have a Kindle eReader? No problem! Just go here to download a FREE Kindle reading app for your PC, Mac, iPhone, iPad, Smartphone, Blackberry, Android, or Teleprompter!

Please spread the word and tell your friends about this limited-time free download offer! There aren't any catches or gimmicks (other than your increased likelihood of being audited or having the NSA add yet another page to your file)...this is just our way of celebrating America's birthday and lighting some fireworks where they'll do the most good!

Download your FREE copy of "OBAMA SUTRA" right here or visit the OBAMA SUTRA website to learn more and see spicy samples!

obama, obama jokes, swearing in, obama sutra, hope n' change, hope and change, obama sutra, free
True Fact: OBAMA SUTRA was the book used for Barry's "Oaf of Office!"

26 comments:

Chuck said...

Time for a sequel? 57 more states of leftist bliss?

I can’t believe they are delaying the employer mandate in the ACA until 2015! Apparently their cadre of campaigners trying to sell Ă˜bamacare to the public (in spite of the fact that it is already the law of the land) are not meeting with success, so to preclude the possibility of losing big in the midterms, they will try to delay the stench that is the ACA.

They need not worry. I predict that the GOP has so alienated the conservatives in this country that the left will win by default, as they did in 2012, because too many on the right will sit it out … again. I’ve seen and heard so many comments from people saying they have given up on the electoral process, and let’s face it, the winner is the one who can get their supporters (dead or alive) to the polls (as often as possible).

It’s going to be hard celebrating Independence Day when we-the-people have given up our independence, not with a fight, but with a whimper.

American Cowboy said...

It may be a day early, but Happy Independence Day to all!

As a patriotic American citizen I intend to forego a lot of what Independence Day has come to signify; picnics, overindulgence in alcohol, sunburns, and noisy free-for-all parties.

Instead I am going to set aside some time to once again read the Constitution of the United States of America and reflect on the why and the who and the how this country was founded, and how I can in some small way make things better for my fellow Americans.

Won't you all join me doing the same this Independence Day?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Chuck- It's fairly hilarious (in that deep, sobbing way) to see that the employer mandate is being pushed back to 2015 as a favor to employers. I think it's way more a favor to the Dems who don't want to see job numbers plunge even further and, oh yeah!, won't have the insurance exchanges remotely ready for the originally scheduled dates anyway.

Regarding the midterms, I worry too. Mind you, I'm not going to sit anything out, but a lot of hope got burned out of me with Barry's re-election. Too many idiots voted, and too many people who should have known better stayed home.

So this 4th of July genuinely feels bittersweet to me. Sort of the way I feel when I hear that military bases have had to cancel their fireworks because of the sequester, but Barry still finds $100m in his sock drawer to take his family on a vacation to Africa.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@American Cowboy- An excellent idea for all of us. Those 4th of July fireworks need to remind us that our freedoms were not won peacefully or held without sacrifice.

John the Econ said...

@Chuck, as Jan 1st and the realities of ObamaCare keep getting closer and closer to being an inescapable reality for voters, what I can't believe is that this won't be the first aspect of the unAffordable Care Act to be pushed back. There are a lot of Democrats in seats up for renewal next year who voted for this nightmare, and the last thing they need is a few million more voters either laid off or cut back to part-time status because of their stink bomb.

But don't worry. The mandates will be back after the 2nd Tuesday in November 2014.

As presidential adviser Valerie Jarrett put it, ""As we make these changes, we believe we need to give employers more time to comply with the new rules," Jarrett wrote. "Since employer responsibility payments can only be assessed based on this new reporting, payments won't be collected for 2014."

In other words, you have another year before we force you to shut your business down. The IRS is still trying to cut down the hundreds of new pages that small businesses will have to be filling out to comply with the law, each and every year.

All other signs are that the massive Federal bureaucracy will not be ready come October, when the "exchanges" are supposed to be online, and January 1st, when it's all supposed to happen. The ship is sinking before it's even launched.

And you're right. The GOP still hasn't found the balls to stand for anything, and seems content to simply run as the anti-Obama party. They will lose in an environment where a block of wood should be able to beat a Democrat.

Will the ghost of Ronald Reagan please speak through somebody?

John the Econ said...

Oh, and kudos to the NFL for outright refusing to shill for Obama & ObamaCare.

No word yet as to if the NBA, which has also been approached will comply.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@John the Econ- While there will be a lot of concealing delays, this is hardly the first. Obamacare essentially ripped the guts out of Medicare Advantage, but then kept it afloat through the 2012 election with billions of dollars of misappropriated funds in order to give Barry cover. Additionally, Obamacare was supposed to offer long term healthcare insurance, but that entire portion of the law collapsed before it even got started. And now, this delay in the employer mandate - solely for the benefit of the employers, of course.

In the meanwhile, I still have NO IDEA what will happen to my family's healthcare insurance in the coming months. Virtually every article says that the self-insured (like me) are going to really get screwed - assuming that we can even keep insurance (my provider, United Healthcare, just pulled out of the individual market in California rather than put up with Obamacare regs - I can't help but wonder if they'll do the same in Texas).

Meanwhile, the GOP does nothing - as always.

John the Econ said...

@Stilton, we're brothers in the same boat; The Econ Family is also with a subsidiary of United Healthcare. Come this fall, I am expecting a letter announcing either a 20% to 40% increase in my monthly premium, or one that says "It's been fun, but we're outta here. Good luck!".

At that point, we'll be facing a hard decision.

As I've said here before, my inclination will be to say "F*#&-it", and go self-insured. I'll pay the "fine", and bank the difference. Since, like you, we're on a "high deductible" plan, unlike most Americans, I am used to buying my own care with cash. (We've never actually met the deductible of our plan) If any of us should actually get sick or injured to the point where insurance would be economically beneficial, it will be available at that time thanks to the no-more-pre-existing conditions mandate. At that point, I'll buy the best plan I can get with the money I've banked. As soon as we're healthy again, we'll drop it.

Does this sound like a sane system to anyone? It's what ObamaCare is pushing millions of people like Stilton and I into doing. Only the "sick" people are going to be buying insurance, and healthy people will be priced out. The rest will become free-riders when needed. The insurance industry will not survive it.

Of course, this was by design. ObamaCare was never intended to be economically viable. It was designed specifically to destroy what was left of the private care industry in America, to clear the field for what the Progressives have wanted all along: An all-encompassing "single payer" regime.

As for our exploitation of ObamaCare, all I can say is what I've been telling my Progressive friends for over a decade now: "Your real problem is not that I disagree with you. Your real problem will be when I give up and join you."

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@John the Econ- We are in the same boat. My insurance is nearly unaffordable already and never pays anything for anything (sky high deductibles). Raising the price - which is inevitable IF United Healthcare doesn't quit Texas - will force me to give up health insurance after paying for it for 35+ years.

At that point, I'll pay cash when I have to, or enroll in Obamacare if catastrophe strikes. Or maybe I won't need to wait; the government subsidies will probably fund most of my coverage whether I want to spend other peoples' money or not.

By the way, about a year ago there was some annoying lib chick who was temporarily big on the Internet holding a sign saying "I Am Obamacare" and bitching about her ovarian cysts. She didn't have insurance because, well, she never wanted to pay for it. But Obamacare would let her buy a policy - so she had people donate for her premiums, Kickstarter style, after which she dropped her coverage like a hot rock when her health improved. I guess she believes that "it takes a village" to pay for HER healthcare, but she doesn't give a flying fart about subsequently contributing to anyone else's healthcare.

I love your quote (in a pained way) that the libs will really be screwed when folks like you and I are forced to give up and go on the dole instead of paying for ourselves and others.

And shoot, once they've broken our spirits we might as well grab some food stamps and other goodies. God knows we're not going to see our Social Security and Medicare funds come back to us in any meaningful way...

Colby said...

Strangely, those folks who are currently uninsured will still get hit with the "buy insurance or pay a hefty fine" caca del toro come January. At the risk of sounding racist, I would bet my next paycheck (for those libs who aren't familiar with this term, it's money you get for working) that an alarming percentage of these folks are obama voters. Is there any doubt this will be the next wee bit of ACA that will get postponed?

I'm guessing that when crap weasel's term is finally over, the entire ACA will have been discretely "postponed" and relegated to the dustbin, but BO will NEVER just ask for repeal. He wants to leave a legacy that he helped the poor... without ever actually helping the poor. The real truth is, his policies will leave the poor in even more dire straits than they ever were, but they will canonize him as their savior, none the less.

@Cowboy,
Great idea, but I think I'll still shoot fireworks, before the carbon tax gets put on them. And I'll still put some steaks on the grill, before grill emmisions are taxed and beef is illegal. And I'll raise my beer glass to the likes of Jefferson, Adams, and Washington. But there will be time for explaining what the day is all about to my 6 grandsons, since they will never learn it in school. We'll talk about Valley Forge, and how a group of farmers, tinkers and businessmen dressed in rags, braved being nearly frozen to death to defeat a fat, well armed British army, all for the sake of simple freedom. We'll talk about how a government big enough to give you anything is also big enough to take everything. And we will remind ourselves to always vote for freedom, not freebies.

JustaJeepGuy said...

@Colby said, "The real truth is, his policies will leave the poor in even more dire straits than they ever were, but they will canonize him as their savior, none the less."

Don't forget that many people still worship FDR as the president who ended the Great Depression, when he actually made it worse. Demo_Rats will NEVER learn!

Jim Hlavac said...

A very happy 4th of July to everyone.

It is my favorite holiday -- what with all that Liberty and All Men are Endowed by their Creator stuff ... which I apply in my own um, unique way :)

Oh, I have been known to carry around a copy of the Declaration and make people read it -- in unlikely places, I assure you ...

meanwhile, Stilt, thanks for the hard copy way back when - which is now floating around the Pinochle & Elks clubs of Boca Raton & Pompano Beach, my father making sure everyone gets a chance to read it. It's quite popular, I'm told.

txGreg said...

If anyone was interested in the brief conversation spurred by Ted Brist's visit the other day regarding electric cars & such, there was an interesting article published recently that you might want to read.

Ozzie Zehner is the author. He was once working at GM on the EV1 project before it was killed, and was a big proponent of leccy cars. I say "was" because after doing more research, he realized that plug-in cars really didn't accomplish much other than shuffling the pollution around.

Anyway, the article is called "Unclean at Any Speed." and is a bit long... but it's well-sourced and - I think - well worth the read.

You might find it interesting especially toward the end where he speculates on the reasons some people (politicians - my opinion) are pushing for more electric cars.

Enjoy, and Happy 4th!

Colby said...

@JeepGuy,
My folks were big FDR fans, but I think it was mostly because of his willingness to confront Hitler and Hirohito (Dad served in the South Pacific and Mom worked on the AlCan highway). The economic recovery of FDR's time happened despite his policies (and mostly after he died), not because of them. The tepid recovery we are now enjoying (harf!) is much the same. If DC suddenly sank into the sea, I swear gas would be $2 a gallon within a month, and unemployment would drop to about 5%.

@txGreg,
C'mon now! Everybody knows electricity is super clean. Why, I plugged in an electric heater last winter and it made absolutely NO MESS in my house and the air was breathable. Try THAT with a coal fire! You are a complete dumbass!
PS - I posted this in case Ted doesn't show. It's easy, by the way. Make a wild claim that is completely lacking in proof, then throw in some insulting name-calling.

David in Socal said...

Not about the 'Sutra', I apologize for going off topic:
Just heard on the news that the Military of Egypt has declared their President', Muhammed Morsi, no longer in charge. This, after a year of economic failure, unemployment gone wild, rising prices, fuel shortages, and halt of tourism due the unrest in the area.(sound familiar?) This was Egypt's first Islamist leader, and was propped up, and promoted by Barack Hussein Obama. C'mon America, it only took Egypt 1 year to get rid of their tyrant Islamist leader; why is it taking so long to get rid of ours?

txGreg said...

@David in Socal,

There is a difference. In Egypt, the people who wanted him out were willing to fight, riot and die in the streets to overthrown him (unfortunately, to replace him with more of the same probably).

Over here, the people who want him out are working. The people who want him in power are the ones who are willing to fight, riot and defecate in the streets (slight difference there I admit).

Unfortunately in our case, we will also most likely get "more of the same" when he finally is out.

David in socal said...

@txGreg,
Yeah, you are right about the r&r of any leader over in those cesspools of Islam, but I am glad for the Egyptians that they were able to oust Morsi of the 'Muslim Bro-Hood'. Just jealous I guess, and my old school optimist door flew open again as it sometimes does. I am thinking, though, that instead of saying we will get "more of the same", we will now need to say "mas de la misma".


John the Econ said...

@Stilton, yes I remember the story of the clueless ObamaCare chick. She is a posterchild for the dysfunction of both "ask what your country can do for you" liberals and ObamaCare itself.

@txGreg, I am currently considering leasing Mrs. Econ an EV. Seems that they are literally giving them away:

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424127887323982704578453123010639156.html#project%3DEYESRD0522%26articleTabs%3Darticle

After Federal and state tax credits, leasing one is practically free! That's right, you'll soon be paying for both my health care and my car.

And my ecologically-correct car will be powered by, wait for it, coal because that is where most of the electricity in my part of the country comes from!

It's a two-fer!

I am considering the following vanity license plates:

COALPWRD
OPM
U PD 4 THS

Egypt: The educated secularists and non-fundementalists aren't interested in 7th-century Sharia. Who knew?

John the Econ said...

Speaking of liberal self-absorbtion and utterly complete self-non-awareness, did anyone else catch Obama's speech to young Africans the other day?

“Ultimately, if you think about all the youth that everybody has mentioned here in Africa, if everybody is raising living standards to the point where everybody has got a car and everybody has got air conditioning, and everybody has got a big house, well, the planet will boil over -- unless we find new ways of producing energy.”

Get it poor Africans? No cars, air conditioning or nice homes for you. We intend to keep your poor and dependent. It's for the planet, after all.

This comes straight from the mouth of a President who hops about the globe almost daily in his own personal taxpayer-paid-for 747 for golf games, vacations and fundraisers with total abandon, like a soccer mom driving her minivan to the supermarket.

But hey, he's going to give them $7-billion in borrowed dollars so they can build some windmills!

That's why this man must be either evil or a complete idiot. Nobody who wasn't one or the other could say something silly like that and sleep at night.

JustaJeepGuy said...

@John the Econ,
Maybe Air Force One should have a license plate saying either "OPM" or "U PD 4 THS". As far as your car goes, I'd be really torn between those two. I'm leaning toward the latter because it might be easier to decode.

Oh, and HAPPY INDEPENDENCE DAY to one and all!!!

Emmentaler "On The Road Again" Limburger said...

Let me be the first to wish you all a Happy Independence Day on the actual 4th of July. While I'm in Canada. Working... (All the leeches probably just swooned.)

Sincerely, though: Happy Independence Day, and THANK YOU to those who fought to make this country free from England (and I apologize for what subsequent generations did with it) and to those who fought against foreign threats in the man years since (and I apologize to them as well).

God bless.

REM1875 said...

Though I have never used it I hold dual citizenship but not from a politically correct country. So I have no worries. Show up at the ER and claim I am illegal presto really free health care, sect 8 housing, ebt card and food stamps. Plus someone will regester me as a democrat and vote for me. no problemo. What a great country.

REM1875 said...

I usually celebrate bt going target shooting during the day as a reminder that freedom is never free.
In the eveving I load my blackpowder 58 cal springfield with 100-120 gr of black powder and put a wadded paper towel on top of it instead of a bullet.
Loadest fire cracker in the neighborhood plus it really lights things up.Pretty spectaclar. Unfortunately next day yard looks like a snowstorm hit it becauseof shredded paper towel
We insist on saftey first so we can do it again next year.

David in SoCal said...

An article from our local rag, written by Author Bryan Golden:

Will this be America's last birthday?

America is the first country in history to be founded based on individual liberty. The principles of liberty are timeless. The concepts apply as much today just as they did over 200 years ago.

Our founders knew firsthand the misery and suffering caused by tyranny. They came from societies where government controlled its citizens with an iron fist. They had a solid understanding of the consequences of unchecked power.

The founders also understood human nature. Throughout history, oppression and subjugation had been the norm. They recognized that power hungry people seeking to dominate others would always exist and be a constant threat to our free society.

Our Constitution was crafted specifically to limit the scope of government to prevent its infringing on individual liberties. It has numerous checks, balances, and safeguards designed to prevent the rise of tyranny.

But our Constitution is only a document. Maintaining a free society requires vigilance and participation. There will always be those seeking to subvert the Constitution in order to seize control.

The power hungry claim the Constitution is out of date. They assert it doesn't apply to them. They violate your constitutional rights while claiming to act in your best interest.

An apathetic and gullible populace facilitates the rise of tyranny. Tyrants depend on people's ignorance, inaction, or apathy in order to confiscate power.

Tyrants are cunningly deceptive. They claim their mission is so altruistic that it is worth giving up your liberty on the pretext of being in your best interest. Tyrants operate by suppressing liberty in small steps under false pretenses.

They target one group at a time. They depend on those unaffected remaining silent because the lost liberty doesn't affect them. But as liberty incrementally disappears, every group will ultimately be targeted. In short order, freedom is lost by all.

Tyrants exert the power of their position to silence opposition. Liberty thrives on the open flow of ideas in a free society. Totalitarian regimes require the suppression of opposing viewpoints.

It's difficult for good and decent people to comprehend the nefarious intent of the power hungry whose sole objective is the subversion of their liberty. These tyrants lie about their objectives. They publicly proclaim to have only benevolent intentions while working persistently behind the scenes on their malevolent goals. This insidious strategy conceals their real purpose under the guise of fairness, safety, health, and national security.

America has more liberty than anywhere else in the world. However, those who have grown up with abundant liberty often take it for granted. When freedom is all they have known, they don't truly appreciate its irreplaceable nature. They have so much freedom that they are not alarmed when their freedom is gradually smothered. By the time they realize their freedom has vanished, it's too late. Once liberty is lost, and those seizing it firmly entrenched, it is extremely difficult to recover.

Our freedoms are unalienable rights, not privileges granted by government. Every item in the bill of rights is a precious jewel designed to ensure the immortality of our liberty. Don't allow anyone to subvert your liberty.

Stand up for and speak out in defense of your rights and the rights of others. You must say NO to those who would take your freedom or your neighbor's freedom. Freedom lost by anyone impacts everyone. When freedom isn't insisted on for all, freedom will exist for none. All freedoms are essential, not just the ones you benefit from or believe in.

Once one freedom starts to fall, a chain reaction begins that consumes all liberty. Your freedom is hard to get and easy to lose. Although it takes vigilance to protect it, it takes so much more effort to get it back once it's gone.

Only you can ensure that this Independence Day is not America's last birthday.

David in SoCal said...

This one statement of the previous post: "It's difficult for good and decent people to comprehend the nefarious intent of the power hungry whose sole objective is the subversion of their liberty", accurately describes what the current regime is doing to U.S. 'Freedom' is NOT 'free stuff' America, wake up; speak up; vote intelligently; or lose your country.

David in SoCal said...

Tonight my thoughts, prayers, and sincere gratitude, are for those brave Americans who defeated tyranny with Muskets, swords, and single shot pistols some 237 years ago, and ALL the brave American heroes, here and abroad, who have fallen in defense of our country since then. If Senator Dianne Freakstein has her way, we will be left with nothing more than Muskets, single action wheel pistols and swords to defend ourselves. No problem Senator Controlstein; we defeated tyranny once with Muskets, pistols, and swords; we can damn well do it again. God SAVE America.