Monday, December 23, 2013

Son of a Beach

obama, obama jokes, cartoon, hawaii, president, stilton jarlsberg, hope n' change, hope and change, vacation, worst , conservative, tea party, oahu

Christmas is nearly here, which means that Barack Obama has returned (like leprosy) to his island home in Hawaii to burn through a few million taxpayer dollars, play golf, and eat shave ice while seeing as little of his family as humanly possible.

Not that his annual escape from Washington will be all fun. He might spend a few somber moments dabbing crocodile tears while offering condolences to the family of health official Loretta Fuddy, the only woman who saw, copied, and verified his alleged birth certificate before she was involved in a plane crash in Hawaii one week ago and, of all the people on board, was the only fatality.

As usual, the president will be staying at an insanely luxurious and expensive mansion in the little town of Kailua on Oahu (a town we know very, very well), on a beautiful beach in the shadow of a mountaintop concrete World War II pillbox which, thank heavens, nobody is likely to use as a nearly impregnable sniper's perch.

Which we can joke about (ha, ha!) because we know that the Secret Service will already have checked the pillbox out and made sure it was safe, in much the same way they made sure that the president's South African translator wasn't a violent, fraudulent, actively hallucinating schizophrenic.

It is not currently known if Barry, as he's known in Hawaii, will be reuniting with any surviving members of his old drug-addled "choom gang," or simply spending time on his own reflecting about how much he hated white people when he lived in Hawaii. Either way, "good times."

And so, Mr. Obama, Hope n' Change encourages you to stay in Hawaii as long as possible and wishes you a heartfelt "Mele Kalikimaka."

God knows you've caused enough of a melee back here on the mainland.

 Fun trivia note: it's still called "twerking" whether you're simulating sex or leadership!


It's No Gouda said...

Hmmm, ol' Barry doesn't seem to be hatin' too hard while hangin' with the rich "haoles" at his exclusive prep school.

Bruce Bleu said...

"Santa's Twerkshop"! Absolute GENIUS Stilt! You never cease to amaze me as much as lamont never ceases to repulse me!
Here's an idea... have pegrossi and magilla start a "dance troupe". They can go by the name that will describe them and be the "official" snack of the "Spite House"... The Ho-Ho's!

CenTexTim said...

I'm not a conspiracy theorist, but that bit about the death of Lorretta Fuddy is one strange coincidence.

In any event, Mele Kalikimaka to all.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@It's No Gouda- In his first autobiography, Barry waxes eloquent about his anti-white resentments, but doesn't offer up much evidence of having suffered from discrimination in Hawaii (where the majority of the population is non-white).

My personal belief is that Barry hated (and hates) white people because he blamed racism for his abandonment by his father.

@Bruce Bleu- Let me give full credit on the "Twerkshop" to, an outfit that lets you make funny videos while plugging in the faces of your friends (or enemies). Just like last week's gas-passing video, this seemed very rude and disrespectful...just like the real Dems in Washington.

@CenTexTim- I'm not a conspiracy theorist either, but yeah - this was weird. Still, I'm inclined to think this was just an accident - no matter how convenient for the president.

American Cowboy said...

The following is copied from USA Today:

NTSB spokesman Eric Weiss said that based on the location of the crash it was unlikely the plane will be recovered.

Now isn't THAT convenient! It is no surprise to this legal American citizen that someone with the political aspirations of those who infest the Øbamma regime, including The Wahn, could arrange for an "accident" like this with only one pre-arranged fatality. Of course no one will ever really know the facts, and IF someone did find the truth there could very possibly be another convenient accident. IMO.

John the Econ said...

Although Obama's "badly needed R&R" (as Wolf Blitzer labeled it) is oil sheikh absurdly expensive, it's still just a pittance compared to what he costs our economy every day he's actually "working".

Meanwhile, the failure of ObamaCare continues to exceed even the most extreme supposed hyperbole of the right. Time is now up for most of those who don't have insurance but are supposed to. It's now clear that come January 1st, there is going to be more people without insurance than before ObamaCare.

Pity the poor citizens of Oregon, who's exchange never honestly went live at all. They're now getting robocalls suggesting that they go elsewhere to find insurance before the end of the year.

As I've said before, if the Obamatons thinks that things are rough now, wait until people start expecting their "free" health care after January.

Meanwhile, imagine the sight of my head exploding yesterday as I watched Administration hacks cheer the single "success" of ObamaCare; lowering health costs.


Fortunately, these clowns can no longer spin reality as even the core-of-the-hard-core liberal establishment is now getting screwed by Obama:

"Many in New York’s professional and cultural elite have long supported President Obama’s health care plan. But now, to their surprise, thousands of writers, opera singers, music teachers, photographers, doctors, lawyers and others are learning that their health insurance plans are being canceled and they may have to pay more to get comparable coverage, if they can find it.

Ms. Meinwald also looked on the state’s health insurance exchange. But she said she found that those plans did not have a good choice of doctors, and that it was hard to even find out who the doctors were, and which hospitals were covered. “It’s like you’re blindfolded and you’re told that you have to buy something,” she said.

It is not lost on many of the professionals that they are exactly the sort of people — liberal, concerned with social justice — who supported the Obama health plan in the first place. Ms. Meinwald, the lawyer, said she was a lifelong Democrat who still supported better health care for all, but had she known what was in store for her, she would have voted for Mitt Romney.

It is an uncomfortable position for many members of the creative classes to be in. "We are the Obama people," said Camille Sweeney, a New York writer and member of the Authors Guild. Her insurance is being canceled, and she is dismayed that neither her pediatrician nor her general practitioner appears to be on the exchange plans. What to do has become a hot topic on Facebook and at dinner parties frequented by her fellow writers and artists.
"I'm for it," she said. "But what is the reality of it?""

Hey liberals, reality sucks when you're forced to live under the regime you so ardently supported, doesn't it?

John the Econ said...

Speaking of the vacationing President and his health care plan:

W.H.: Obama has signed up for insurance under Obamacare

"In what an official acknowledged is a “symbolic” move since the president gets his medical care from the military, Obama selected a low-cost bronze plan through the District of Columbia exchange. He made the pick over the weekend while vacationing in Hawaii."

But then, there's this: "But Obama did not directly sign up for insurance. Rather, his staff went in person to sign him up, an official told POLITICO.

Oh, I see. Obama didn't actually sign himself up. His staff did it for him, and not through an actual exchange, but in person.

Then there's this gem: “Like some Americans, the complicated nature of the president’s case required an in-person sign-up,” the official said. “As you’d expect, the president’s personal information is not readily available in the variety of government databases uses to verify identities.”

As anyone who has bothered to to look into this President's background knows, practically all information about him is not readily available.

"Senior adviser Valerie Jarrett told American Urban Radio Networks that the president is “leading by example” by selecting coverage before the deadline to get coverage that takes effect on Jan. 1."

So here's the example: While you're on your taxpayer-paid vacation in Hawaii, tell your tax-paid-staff to go out and interface with the necessary bureaucrats to symbolically procure some phony insurance you don't really need because you can't do it on your own anyway.

And what does the phony coverage for the entire 1st Family cost? Only $400/month.


mike said...

It is an uncomfortable position for many members of the creative classes to be in. "We are the Obama people," said Camille Sweeney, a New York writer and member of the Authors Guild. Her insurance is being canceled, and she is dismayed that neither her pediatrician nor her general practitioner appears to be on the exchange plans. What to do has become a hot topic on Facebook and at dinner parties frequented by her fellow writers and artists.
"I'm for it," she said. "But what is the reality of it?""

Um, shouldn't one know the "reality" of a thing before judging for or against?

John the Econ said...

@mike, unfortunately that's not the case for liberals, who all too often vote based on "feelings" over "intellect". They're all for the happy vibe of "fairness" and "equality". But the reality is usually intended for someone else to endure.

PRY said...

As John the Econ said...

"As anyone who has bothered to to look into this President's background knows, practically all information about him is not readily available."

Wow, isn't that the truth?!!

I instantly visualized Obama going to this doctor, sitting on the exam table in his hospital gown, and when he attempts to look at obama's medical records, he finds nothing but blank pages!

At this point in time, I am encouraged slightly by the horde of Obama supporters suffering dismay at THEIR insurance woes...a testament, I think, to at least what's left of of freedoms that it can even be REPORTED! Make no mistake, if this administration COULD squash all the bad news about the ACA, they all is not lost yet!

The government is attempting to treat insurance companies as 'wholly-owned subsidiaries'...if they can, then we already have 'government-run health-care' in place. But, enjoy Christams, and wait for the tsunami in 2014 as reams of cancellations REALLY start hitting home!

John the Econ said...

@PRY, the part I love was that Obama chose the "Bronze" plan, almost certainly so that the ignorant would say "Wow, even the President can get his whole family covered for a mere $400."

Of course, he chose such a plan exactly because it was both cheap, and something he knows he'll never actually have to try to use. It doesn't matter what doctors and facilities are or are not available under his plan, because for the rest of his life he'll be getting customized care unavailable to practically any other American. The idea that he'd be visiting the same doctors and clinics that the other citizens of DC would under the "Bronze" plan is laughable, at least to him. It's not such a laughing matter to the millions of other citizens who don't have the President's choices, and will be stuck with the limited choices forced upon them.

And I disagree that he's "attempting to treat insurance companies as 'wholly-owned subsidiaries'". Quite the opposite. He's a sadistic torturer who's twisting the knife that these companies openly handed him 5 years ago. He's inflicting as much pain as possible before inevitably killing them.

The plight of the health insurance industry at this moment reminds me of the character Lando Calrissian in The Empire Strikes Back, who quickly learns that the deal he made with Darth Vader wasn't going to work out as well as he thought:

Lando: [outraged] That was never a condition of our agreement...
Darth Vader: Perhaps you think you're being treated unfairly?
Lando: [after a pause; nervous tone] No.
Darth Vader: Good. You know it would be unfortunate if I had to leave a garrison here.
Lando: [to himself] This deal is getting worse all the time!

Vader: I am altering the deal. Pray I don't alter it any further.

CenTexTim said...

@John the Econ - I saw that "badly needed R&R" comment. Made me want to gag.

As for the (NY professional and cultural elite, schadenfreude is inadequate to describe my feelings (and BTW, who the hell declared them "elite").

UPDATE: The 'deadline' of Dec. 23 to enroll in obamacare has been extended. The libs will say that's because of overwhelming demand. The realists will recognize that it's because the obamacare website can't handle a fraction of the volume eBay, Amazon, Facebook, or any other well-designed and built website can handle.

If they can't even enroll people in this abomination, how on God's Green Earth do they expect to manage it.

Rhetorical question... they haven't thought that far ahead...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@American Cowboy- Do I think it's likely that Fuddy was "eliminated?" No. Do I think it's possible? Oh, yeah.

@John the Econ- NOBODY on the Left supported Obama based on the "reality" of what he was saying or what he could accomplish. They were willing idiots, and deserve all the pain they've created.

A couple of thoughts about Obama's fake-out "Obamacare" plan.

First, as long as he's making a "symbolic gesture," then why not get an EXPENSIVE plan which would add more money for the treatment of others?

Secondly, people may be able to get insurance despite a pre-existing condition now, but the insurance companies are sure as heck going to demand KNOWING about your pre-existing conditions. And as you point out, NOTHING is known about Obama's health records. We don't know if his sinuses have been hollowed out from cocaine, if he's riddled with STDs, if he's bi-polar, or if he's even genetically related to Barack Obama Sr.

@mike- EXACTLY! These morons voted for pleasing lies over obvious but more challenging realities.

And by the way, being a writer or artist is no excuse for lacking basic cognitive reasoning skills. It's more frequently simply a lifestyle choice by the self-indulgent who want to pass themselves off as having an "artistic nature."

@PRY- The tsunami you refer to is definitely coming. And by the way, a phrase which I think is seen too little - but will become HUGELY important soon - is "risk corridors."

Basically, the insurance companies knew the only way they could make money was with a huge influx of HEALTHY young people paying premiums. Otherwise, the insurance companies start bleeding money. Which is why Obamacare established what it called "risk corridors" which assured that if the insurers are losing hundreds of millions of dollars owing to the poor design and implementation of Obamacare, the government will pay them back - to the point of profitability - with taxpayer money.

And THAT, my friend, is as close to a backdoor "single payer" plan as anyone could ever want. Not to mention MASSIVE redistribution of wealth.

@John the Econ- When it comes to "altering the deal," Darth Vader was a piker compared to Barry.

@CenTexTim- Oh, but they have thought that far ahead. This health insurance "system" was never intended to be managed - it was intended to fail spectacularly, destroying the private insurance system simultaneously. And it's working like gangbusters.

David in SoCal said...

econ john: Osmoken'mirror's paltry attempt to prove the ACA viable will not cost him a single 'Bama Buck. It does, however, add another $400.00 a month of taxpayer dollars to the almost 1 billion $(and counting) Health Care Law/Tax. And NO. he will NEVER, EVER, use his own designed Health Care program, much like all the rest of the Laws his Highness has passed. I am still holding hope that Mr. Snowden has copies of Mr. Soetoro's records; can't wait to see the Exalted One stand before Judge Judy and git a verbal ass whoopin.
stilt: Thanks again for cracking my butt with the bulls-eye toons! You really need to show some compassion towards Ol' Barry this Holiday Season; someone who works as hard as he does doing NOTHING, deserves a lotta vacations.

To all: May your homes and hearts be filled with the true spirit of Christmas. May family, friends, love, and good health embrace you. And to the rest of us: 'Happy Festivus'!!

WomanHonorThyself said...

keep up the good fight! Happy holiday hugs to you and yours!!...xoxox