Wednesday, January 6, 2016

The Right to Bar Arms

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, gun control, executive orders, iran

Barack Obama took to the airwaves yesterday to announce his new round of gun control executive orders, and dab at his eyes with stinging, jalapeño-juice stained fingers in order to feign what actual humans call "tears."

Declaring for the umpteenth time that he is being driven by Dr. Martin Luther King Jr's "fierce urgency of now," the president listed measures intended to close the "gun show loophole," prevent firearms ownership by Social Security recipients who need help managing their affairs, enable (and/or require) physicians to report people with mental instability to the FBI ("the patient was wearing a Donald Trump Make America Great Again campaign hat"), and possibly require people selling only one gun to first obtain a costly seller's license which takes the government months to process. Or longer, if Lois Lerner is in charge.

However, the executive orders weren't entirely one-sided. According to the president, even buyers who have been repeatedly convicted of violent crimes and are certifiably insane can still spend up to $150 billion a year on guns, threaten their neighbors, stockpile arms, fire missiles at American aircraft carriers,, wait, that's his deal with Iran.

In any event, the president's executive orders are expected to be immediately challenged as unconstitutional, although his crocodile tears did dry long enough to sneer, "No matter how many times people try to twist my words around, I taught constitutional law."

Which perhaps explains why he wasn't home to watch the TV episode of Schoolhouse Rock which explained where laws come from.


It was never really our intention at Hope n' Change to make an ongoing feature of the Kafkaesque experiences associated with our Obamacare health insurance policy, but we feel that we owe it to history.

As you may recall, despite Barry's promises we couldn't keep our doctor or the health insurance we liked and were forced into an Obamacare policy last year...and it turns out we weren't allowed to keep that either. So we got a new policy this year which doesn't include any of our doctors, has an even higher deductible and, being an HMO plan, employs a "gatekeeper" to prevent us from getting actual medical care.

But wait! The helpful folks at recently called to say there was a problem with the application we turned in months ago. A problem which had to be rectified, or they'd take our insurance away.

The phone call began cryptically enough, with a man claiming to be with saying he needed us to give personal information over the phone to prove we were who he'd just called.  We declined, citing concerns about identity theft, and instead asked him to tell us something from our records to show that he was legit.  "I can't do that," he pointed out in his best Catch-22 style, "because you haven't proved that you are who you say you are."

Once past that hurdle, we got to the crux of the problem...
"Based on your previous tax records, your estimate for your future earnings in 2016 is too low."
"To begin with," we replied, "it's an estimate. But I already know that my earnings will be lower."
"Yes-s-s-s," the voice sighed, "but your estimate must be no lower than your adjusted gross income for your most recent tax year."
"Is that a rule? That's not listed on the application form. And why would it be my adjusted gross income and not my taxable income?"
"The rule isn't listed on the application because you're free to do your own estimate however you like. But if we disagree with your estimate, then your insurance will be rescinded."
"What?! Okay, how do I keep that from happening?!"
"You need to log on to again and change your application to reflect the higher estimated income."
"But won't that increase my insurance payments?"
"It will change the amount of any subsidy you qualify for."
"But my payments will then be based on an income higher than what I'll really have. So when 2016 is finished and I can show my actual earnings, will I get a rebate for what I overpaid?"
"No. can begin our appeals process."
(Cue sounds of thunder and ominous organ music)

In the end, we did what the voice on the phone told us to do - much as if we were dealing with a kidnapper demanding ransom. So the price of our insurance has gone up needlessly, and we've been reminded that even when you think you've got health insurance the government can now take it away at any time for no reason at all.

If that doesn't scare you, you're not paying attention.


George in Houtx said...

well, first things second! as for the insurance part .... I keep hearing about a financial "disaster" that will make shtf look like a walk in the park. all of the economic indicators point the same way (from what I've seen). should that be the case, I will likely die before you,Stilt. I am a vet who has NOT rescinded my oath. I am a member of NRA and have multiple firearms. the only thing I have in my favor is training with unconventional weapons. I figure that I might last a week or two.

Joseph ET said...

The Second Amendment to the United States Constitution

I’ve been hearing some anti-gun political pundits suggesting that the second amendment states “a well-regulated” militia suggest that the governmental bureaucracy can apply countless rules and regulations in regard to the second amendment.

This article explains that they could, individually, or in concert, "well regulate" themselves; that is, they could train to shoot accurately and to learn the basics of military tactics.
That make more sense!!

Barry Newman said...

There was a wonderful take off on the Schoolhouse Rock segment on Saturday Night Live. (Our Fearless Pen-carrying Pres throws the bill off the steps of Congress and writes an executive order). Considering how liberal and snarky SNL can be, it was rather amazing to see it. The link is below:

well worth watching.Really. Watch it, you won't be sorry.

Thanks, Stilton, for all your thoughtful, interesting, and...yes...hilarious commentary.

Dilbertnomore said...

Tears. I would have expected nothing less. Sincerity is the main thing in politics. Once a politician can sincerely fake sincerity, he's got it made.

Jim said...

Hmmm...I wonder what agency was tasked with overseeing O'care. That person's tactics sound quite familiar...

Judi King said...

Article II, section 1 "The executive Power shall be vested in a President of the United States of America............(quoted from OUR Constitution). Articles I, II, and III are defining WHAT the 3 branches of OUR government are, nowhere does it give any of the branches the ability to unilaterally make their own laws. How can everyone say the president has the constitutional right to do this?
Crocodile tears......what a cheap ploy by this narcissistic phony!!!

TrickyRicky said...

I've been paying close attention to the whole shit storm for 7 years, and I am scared to death.

Geoff King said...

More whittling away of our 2nd Ammendment rights by the totalitarian left. Ammo is already very difficult to come by. By their logic the right to bear arms should only apply to a select few approved by them, and then only if it is a single-shot .22 rifle.
They like to say "no one needs a 30 round magazine to go hunting". To which I say: when the Founding Fathers wrote the 2nd Ammendment, they were not worried that the deer were coming.
Molon Labe!

Fred Ciampi said...

With the tears, obummer either got many more sympathizers for his gun grab or he caused many more guns to be sold ... or both.

And speaking of "no one needs a 30 round magazine to go hunting", did you read about the hunter in Alaska? That's a real good argument for really big magazines.

David in SoCal said...

Legal responsible American gun owners: Can you feel it? That familiar pressure from behind that happens every time Osocialist 'pens' or 'phones' another gun law, that does NOTHING to stop illegal gun crimes, but does EVERYTHING to hinder legal/responsible /trained owners? Just watched his latest delivery of verbal defecation concerning his latest round of illegally penned restrictions; with all the fake sincerity/tooth whistles/pouty faces/pooched lower lip/hand distractions/untrue statistics/claiming it's 'for the kids'/fake ass tears that one has come to expect with this inept crap weasel/sorriest excuse for an American President in the history of America. Did anyone catch the part about making guns more like phones/tablets that can be engineered via electronics/passwords/or finger print technology to lock them out or be located? If I didn't know better, the extra Opressure on my exhaust port is telling me the new gun technology will make the current guns obsolete, and then what? This is what it would look like if Barry Ostompontheconstitution had his way:

Stilty: So sorry for your Unaffordable Health Care Tax money grab. Was the ACA agent talking in a German accent? (Dju vil sigh-n zee papers, or vee hab vays of persvading dju, comrade Jarlsberg) You know they have to be desperate for the funding of this Oboondoggle, as nobody wants to sign up for it. Is there a liquor delivery service in your town?

Love y'all here @ Hn'C; may we all be blessed with a moderately neato 2016.

Anonymous said...

No tears for Christians, Yazidis and women being raped, tortured and slaughtered by Isis. No tears for all of the suffering caused by his 'Arab Spring'. No tears for babies killed by abortions. No tears for all of the taxes we are forced to pay for your aid to Iran, your welfare for illegal immigrants, your lavish parties and vacations. No tears for so many things, Barry. Even crocodiles can squeeze out a few tears once in a while. That doesn't mean they still won't eat you when they can.

CenTexTim said...

If I didn't know better, I'd think you were making up your obamacare tribulations. But after having dealt with government bureaucracy for many years, I have come to realize that no one in their right mind could come up with a world so detached from logic and reality. Like you said, it really is Kafkaesque:

"...when you enter a surreal world in which all your control patterns, all your plans, the whole way in which you have configured your own behavior, begins to fall to pieces, when you find yourself against a force that does not lend itself to the way you perceive the world.

"You don't give up, you don't lie down and die. What you do is struggle against this with all of your equipment, with whatever you have. But of course you don't stand a chance. That's Kafkaesque."

John the Econ said...

Another brilliant cartoon. Definitely sharing that.

On the up-side, Obama is probably the best gun salesman in America. Clearly, most Americans do see the threat posed by this President to their civil rights. In the safe, stable America we believe in and the President's fanboiz claim he's achieved, so many people wouldn't feel compelled to buy weapons at unprecedented rates.

@Stilton's adventures in ObamaCare: I hope you're keeping good notes and preparing to write a novel. It's a definite contrast to the success that the President's fanboiz claim that ObamaCare is. My guess is that if you're broke and on Medicaid and all your bills are already paid by the Federal government, ObamaCare is just wonderful for you. For non-welfare America, it's a hellhole.

"...but your estimate must be no lower than your adjusted gross income for your most recent tax year."

So that's how they do it; The Obama economy is great because they're always "estimating" that you're going to make more next year. The reality is that the only place in this economy where "more" in the future has been an accurate estimate is in the Federal debt.

Colby Muenster said...

I STILL don't get this "gun law" shit that oozes to the surface of the DC swamp every time a black person gets shot. Why not make it illegal to shoot people?

But seriously, folks... O'Liar knows damn well his latest round of anti gun, "pen and phone" caca del toro will go nowhere. His goal is not to stop gun violence; it's to take another swipe at conservatives and Republicans. "If the Congress won't do anything, I will!" says O'Potentate. The sheeple don't get it; the gun laws are there, but the person sworn to enforce them refuses to do so. Why aren't the gangs who own illegal guns being rounded up and jailed in Chicago?

This guy taught Constitutional law. I can only imagine what his classes were like. "Students, here is a copy of The Bill of Rights. Please write a thesis on how to best undermine it."

So sorry about your travails with O'Killya-care, Stilton. We all knew it would be this way when it was getting shoved down our throats. If only the people who shoved it there could have it shoved somewhere else on their anatomy!

PRY said...'s only the sixth day of the new year! Hang on if you can! Perhaps O-care and all these exec orders can be eliminated in a year from now, optimistically speaking!

Pam said...

My school district has been pushing us to "go paperless" and convert to Direct Deposit for years. Now, we're told Vets and SS recipients using "direct deposit" are demonstrating they are too mentally incompetent to get to a bank or do their own finances if they use DD, and can't have a gun.

So Which is it? Are you eco friendly -- or crazy? The Soc. Security Admin was even RUNNING ADS, asking the public to start using Direct Deposit last year!!

It's infuriating.

And, of COURSE we're depressed -- we're Taxpayers!! Oops, Guess we shouldn't say that out loud - no guns for us!!

JustaJeepGuy said...

I've said it before, I'll say it again: Barack Hussein and the Demo_Rats don't want to take guns away from criminals or even terrorists. The criminals (like in, say, Chicago) aren't going to revolt against the government. Only the freedom-loving, Constitution-respecting American citizens might take up arms against this oppressive government, and THAT'S who Barack Hussein's rules are aimed at. He couldn't care less about the terrorists because he believes in their cause--that America is evil and needs to be put down. If Barack Hussein and the Demo_Rats gave a damn about crime, they'd do something about crime. As you can see, the only thing they want to eliminate is the armed citizen who can resist the government's jack-booted thugs--and George H. W. Bush was full of cr@p when he bailed on the NRA because of that statement. Those thugs need to know that I'm usually still awake at the time of night when they will start kicking in doors to grab guns....

Anonymous said...

Did you notice the Liar-in-Chief is wiping his tears away with his fingers making a peace sign? What a great photo-op!

Geoff King said...

In his 33 minute speech, Øblather mentioned himself 76 times.
No narcissism there.

Bruce Bleu said...

Having traveled to England NUMEROUS times, it is OBVIOUS that lamont (our queen) is sending a message to their Queen with that "V" he is flashing to her. That's the same as "mister digit" over here!

Rod said...

I've started NOW in getting out the conservative vote from all of us; and exposing all this bullshit. If all conservatives will actively do that as well or better than the liberal cheats & foreigners, I can't friggin' wait for the conservative landslide in November. The upcoming details on how Hillary avoids facing charges should be pretty good info-ammo as well. We have about 11 months.

MAX Redline said...

Frankly, I'd have hung up on your caller after informing him that unless it comes to me in writing, it doesn't count. Hell, if you want to dispute a credit card transaction, you need to send it in writing. I'm never going to trust somebody on a phone line who pretends to be from the government; VOIP makes spoofing too easy these days.

Put it in writing and mail it on out, or troll on.

Just Me said...

Cry Baby, no one on this planet wipes his eyes like this jughead.
I think he had some sort of tear inducing crap on his fingers to make him cry.

Boligat said...


O has gone paperless for years. He direct deposits on our living room right where you are sure to step in it.


That isn't a peace sign, it's a Roman soldier ordering five beers. But in O's case, since there is nothing soldierly about him, it has to be an insult. Bruce is right, but the insult it to US, his "subjects".

Boligat said...

Stilty, is there any way to go back and edit our own posts?

Sarah Rolph said...

Jalapeno juice, eh? I was guessing glycerin.

We had to get new health insurance for my husband recently. Situation nowhere near as dire as yours, Stilt, so I won't complain, but it has been chilling dealing with people who seem to have been captured by the Borg.

Here's a more cheerful story. I went to a Carly Fiorina campaign event this week and it was quite nice. Lots of smart, engaged people. Plenty of oldsters, but lots of young people too, which in itself seemed positive. And people were really nice to each other, getting out of each other's way so others could chat with Carly, who was amazingly patient and gracious with us one-on-one. But here's what I want to highlight: during the question period, a lady in the crowd introduced herself as a registered Democrat -- "welcome!" said Carly -- and asked about Obamacare: Carly says she wants it gone, what would she replace it with? The answer was good -- she explained regulatory capture, without using that term, but mentioning a few regulatory details about the insurance industry to clearly make the point. They she called that "crony capitalism" and said that the solution is the free market. And everyone understood! Even the Democrat -- she was near me, so I asked her if she liked that answer, and she said she did.

Renewed my faith in humanity a little bit. People treating one another respectfully, sharing ideas, helping one another understand... May we all find, and bring, more of that.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Boligat- Sorry, but there really isn't a way to edit previous comments. I can't even do it on my OWN comments.

@Sarah Rolph- Thanks for sharing the story of the Fiorina event. I think there could be a LOT more agreement among people if we could all just talk more quietly and respectfully.

Anonymous said...

The photo of Obama wiping 'tears' from his check is disgusting. Isn't the two finger 'V' also a sign for ISIS? Seems to me somewhere this was disclosed in another photo of him. What a crock1

Judi King said...

@ Bruce Bleu: Yes, the V sign does mean what you say in GB, which makes me wonder just what Churchill was trying to convey during WWIII.

Wahoo said...

Who knows where those two fingers have been? Just the thought brings tears to my eyes, too.

Popular Front said...

Hi folks and a Happy New Year to all!

Just a little background on the 'V' sign for you that you may not know. After the Battle of Crecy (France 1346) where the English longbowmen slaughtered the French mounted nobility from a distance, any English bowmen subsequently captured by the French would have the first two fingers of their right hand (the draw hand) hacked off to ensure they could not shoot again. This French helpless fury only increased after the English archers did it to them again at Poitiers (1356) and Agincourt (1415).
The two fingered 'V' sign was a taunt from the English ranks to their French opponents to show that they still have their fingers and could and would shoot with deadly accuracy. Very much a 'chuck you, farley' for the times that has carried through to this day. Very English, although Aussies use it too.

Judi King said...

@ Popular Front: Thanks for the history lesson. Very interesting and informative.