The Big Thinker

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Tonight, the president will make a speech from West Point in which he reveals his (not very) top secret new strategy for Afghanistan: sending 30,000 additional troops while sulking about it, and promising Al Qaeda and the Taliban that we'll pull all of our troops out again as soon as humanly possible.

The president is hoping that committing troops will be seen as actual commitment...but unfortunately, he isn't fooling anyone except his former far-left supporters like Michael Moore, who are accusing Obama of becoming a bloodsucking, imperialist warmonger who will break the hearts of young, idealistic voters and discourage them from ever returning to the polls. One can only hope...

TV Or Not TV

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ABC is pairing Oprah and Obama to remind Americans what is really important and meaningful about Christmas: politics and celebrity.

Hopefully the Queen of daytime TV will ask Obama why he and Michelle have made it a tradition not to give their daughters presents at Christmas, and what impact it could have on our economy if others decide to give up shopping in December. In fact, we'd like to suggest that Oprah get the president's reaction to the following scene from "Miracle on 34th Street," when an advisor lectures a politically ambitious judge on the fallout of killing Christmas sales...

"All right, you go back and tell them that there's no Santa Claus. It's all over the papers. The kids read it and they don't hang up their stockings. Now what happens to all the toys that are supposed to be in those stockings? Nobody buys them. The toy manufacturers are going to like that; so they have to lay off a lot of their employees, union employees. Now you got the CIO and the AF of L against you and they're going to adore you for it and they're going to say it with votes.

Oh, and the department stores are going to love you too and the Christmas card makers and the candy companies. Ho ho. Barack, you're going to be an awful popular fella. And what about the Salvation Army? Why, they got a Santa Claus on every corner, and they're taking a fortune.

But you go ahead Barack, you do it your way. You go on back in there and tell them that you rule there is no Santy Claus. Go on. But if you do, remember this: you can count on getting just two votes, your own and that district attorney's out there".

Brain Freeze

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The so-called "Climategate" scandal has revealed that top climate scientists have altered, hidden, and invented data to falsely promote the theory of manmade global warming. Yet the president is going to Copenhagen (on his way to pick up his Nobel Peace Prize) to announce a U.S. pledge to cut CO2 emissions by 17%...a target impossible to reach without crippling American industry.

Assuming the president isn't an idiot, and isn't surrounded by idiots, then one can only presume that his actual goal is the crippling of the American economy. If this sends a chill down your spine, you'd better get used to it - "global warming" won't give you any relief...

BONUS: Just in time for the holiday season, the Democrats clarify their position on emissions!