Saturday, August 21, 2010

The Wrong Guy to Cross

According to two recent national polls, most Americans no longer believe that Barack Hussein Obama is a Christian, and as many as 1-in-5 Americans believe the president to be a Muslim.

The Whitehouse immediately fired back to say emphatically that the president is not a Muslim ("Not that there's anything wrong with that"), and pointed out that even though the president doesn't attend church, he "prays every day" (although the Whitehouse didn't mention which way he's facing at the time), and he receives a "Christian devotional" thought-of-the-day every morning on his Blackberry!

Granted, this would be pretty convincing if these were Tweets from Jesus, or if there was any compelling reason to believe that a man who ignored the content of Jeremiah Wright's sermons for 20 years was paying more attention to his Blackberry.

Here at Hope n' Change, we absolutely support the Constitutional right of Americans to believe that Barack Hussein Obama is a Muslim, although we won't comment on the wisdom of their doing so.

But what we will say is that the longer this president is in office, the clearer it becomes that there's a stranger in the Whitehouse.

Barack Hussein Obama before he found Blackberry.

Friday, August 20, 2010

Bad Eggs

There seems to be a lot of confusion regarding two very similar stories in the news, but the analysts at Hope n' Change are here to help.

Approximately 250 Americans have developed vomiting and diarrhea owing to bad eggs which are tainted with salmonella, and the eggs are being taken off the market in a massive recall.

But millions of Americans have developed vomiting and diarrhea owing to the rotten eggs in Washington DC, and they can only be gotten rid of in a massive midterm election effort. Some of these rotten eggs are simply cracked, others are spoiled, and many are still around despite being way past their expiration dates.

Of course, another way to distinguish between eggs and politicians is by applying the so-called "bacon method." If the subject is just sitting next to the bacon, it's probably an egg. If it tries to take the bacon home to its district, it's a politician.


Thursday, August 19, 2010

Conspiracy Theory

Just when it seems nobody can make the controversy any more divisive or offensive, Democratic House Speaker Nancy Pelosi has popped up to demand a taxpayer-funded congressional investigation to discover who might be funding the opposition to the Ground Zero mosque.

That's right: Nancy assumes that nobody could oppose the mosque on principle or because the wounds of 9/11 are still raw. Some mysterious somebody must be paying people to be against the project, presumably to make mosque-loving Democrats look bad.

Meanwhile, the imam behind the Cordoba House project still refuses to divulge the funding sources for the $100 million dollar mega-mosque, leading to speculation that the money may be coming from Saudi Arabian backers of "Wahabi" mosques and schools which are vehemently anti-Western.

The most disturbing part of all this is Nancy Pelosi's apparent belief that no one could or would speak up on behalf of America unless they were being bribed.

But then again, after so many years, it's hard for her not to think like a Democrat.


Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Hitting A Saur Spot

We can excuse dinosaurs for acting like they have walnut-sized brains...but we think it's only fair to expect more from politicians and the mainstream media.

We could link to dozens of news stories today which spotlight the increasingly heated rhetoric between those in favor of the Ground Zero mosque, those who are against it, and those people like Barack Hussein Obama who have no opinion about either the mosque or 9/11.

But what we couldn't find were any stories about how the Cordoba House project is actually helping the healing begin.

Instead, the tensions between Islam and America are predictably being ramped up to new levels. Which, unless they have walnut-sized brains, is clearly the intent of the mosque-builders.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Swimming Mosque

To prove to the American people that the it's now safe to go swimming in the Gulf of Mexico, Barack Hussein Obama put on his Speedo and bravely jumped into Saint Andrew Bay, which technically isn't part of the Gulf of Mexico but, in the words of the Whitehouse photographers, is "close enough for government work."

The president and his family also courageously proved that it's perfectly safe to eat seafood from the Gulf, by going to a restaurant and looking over a menu of shrimp, crab, clams, and oysters before settling on chicken fingers and burgers, no doubt made from the flocks of chickens and herds of cows who are again frolicking in the Gulf of Mexico. Or maybe they were caught in Saint Andrew Bay - it's very hard to tell them apart.

Still, Barack Hussein Obama's actions speak louder than words...especially since with the Ground Zero mosque controversy, the "let me be clear" president has made it abundantly clear that his words mean nothing.

The alleged president swims somewhere sort of near the Gulf of Mexico.

Monday, August 16, 2010

An Unclarification

At Barack Hussein Obama's festive Ramadan dinner in the Whitehouse, he clearly threw his support behind the building of the "Ground Zero mosque," getting applause from his Muslim guests. His exact words:

"Let me be clear. As a citizen, and as President, I believe that Muslims have the same right to practice their religion as everyone else in this country. And that includes the right to build a place of worship and a community center on private property in Lower Manhattan."

For once the president was clear...and it didn't play well with the American public, who consider the construction of such a mosque to be legal, but an insult, a sacrilege, and an act of provocation by those in whose name the 9/11 attacks were committed.

So now the president is attempting to change his vote to a noncommittal "present" on the issue and has taken a few minutes out of his family vacation to issue an unclarification of his previous stand: “I was not commenting and I will not comment on the wisdom of making a decision to put a mosque there.”

So he wants us to believe that he was actually using the occasion of Ramadan to tell a roomful of applauding Muslims that they're being stupid?

Barack Hussein Obama has a long history of trying to appear to be on both sides of every issue. But when it comes to 9/11 and Ground Zero, the sides are very clearly delineated: right or wrong. For us, or against us.

And his refusal to clearly state that he stands with the American people tells us which side he's on.


Some people have said the proposed mosque "isn't even close to Ground Zero."
But the Burlington Coat Factory building had two floors destroyed
by this landing gear from one of the doomed jets that hit the twin towers.


Sunday, August 15, 2010

Flare for the Dramatic

Our highly technological modern society is great in a lot of ways...and really, really bad in one specific way: it's very delicate.

The electronics, computers, and circuit boards that run everything in our lives could be instantly fried by either a naturally occurring solar flare, or the "electro-magnetic pulse" of a single nuclear weapon fired high in our atmosphere.

Electricity would be shut off. Water, pumped from afar, would stop coming out of faucets. There would be no communications. Most recent cars wouldn't run. Access to food and emergency care would be cut off. And in the resulting chaos, there are estimates that as much as 90% of Americans could die.

As if that wasn't scary enough, we're now entering a new period of strong solar activity - with a major coronal ejection only a week ago.

The good news is that scientists have determined we could "harden" our electrical grid for $100 million dollars, and the House unanimously passed a resolution saying "Yes! Let's do it! Quick!"

But in the Senate, they said "where are the votes for us if we fund this?" and, not finding any, they killed it. And maybe us.

Of course, $100 million is a lot of money. But it's only 1/1650th of what congress added to our debt in just one week. And only 1/260th of what the Democrats just decided to give to teachers' unions to buy more votes for November.

By comparison, potentially saving the Earth seems like it could have been a pretty good deal. But since it didn't happen, we can all continue to look toward the sun...and hope for no change.


The good news is that cockroaches will survive.
The bad news is that they tend to vote Democrat.