In yet the latest surprising revelation about America's first half-black Irish Native-American Indo-Hawaiian Islamo-Christian president, Barack Obama has announced that he is also Jewish.
At the annual White House Hanukkah reception, the schlemiel-in-chief was greeting guests with a festive "Torah, Torah, Torah!" when he was approached by a reveler who quoted a friend as saying, "I didn't know the president was Jewish!"
After a short, gagging pause to wash down a mouthful of Matzoh with a nice not-too-expensive Mogen David wine, Obama replied "I am, in my soul."
The president then addressed the party attendees, carefully avoiding stereotypes by praising lox and latkes ("Not as good as your mom’s," he whined with a Borscht-belt accent, "but they're good") before saying, "I can’t think of a better way to mark this holiday, with its message that freedom is possible, than with the historic changes that I announced today in our Cuba policy."
Because what says Hanukkah more than embracing an oppressive regime, right? Not that Hope n' Change isn't anxious to see how the Castro brothers look sporting the new yarmulkes Mr. Obama gifted them with.
The nation's first Jewish president then concluded his holiday remarks by asking everyone to raise their glasses to join him for a traditional Yiddish toast.
"Molotov!" he said, then made a wish and blew out the candles on the Menorah.
...And to all a good night.