|Yes, but at "double time" you'll finally get that $15 an hour you've been wanting.|
We suppose it's hard for them to count their blessings when they're more consumed with covetous envy of others. And it's seemingly impossible for them to swallow their pride (or is it hubris?) long enough to say "thank you" to their fellow citizens (including, especially, the "evil rich") who fund not only this nation's many generous social programs and safety nets, but the infrastructure that keeps our standard of living high and the troops who keep us safe.
We enter this Thanksgiving holiday at a time of great world tension and, sadly, legitimate concern about the quality of our political leaders. But that shouldn't stop us from drawing a deep breath, turning off the doomsayers on television for awhile, and making a calm reassessment of the incredible bounty which all Americans enjoy.
And of course, taking time to give thanks.
BONUS: POP GOES THE ISIL
Which would have been a lot more comforting if the State Department's CYA Bureau didn't then scare the hell out of everyone by issuing a worldwide terror warning suggesting that, according to their keen analysis of intelligence data, anything could happen, anywhere, at any time. And they advise special caution "during the holiday season and at holiday festivals or events."
So remember, don't be afraid - but make sure your Thanksgiving turkey really has a pop-up timer and not a detonator.
BONUS 2: CROCKMAKER
Young Ahmed the Clockmaker has decided that rather than settling for 15 minutes of fame, he wants 15 million dollars for alleged "damages" to his reputation.
But just what "damages" has he actually suffered? Following his brief kerfuffle with authorities in Irving, Texas, his story went viral for two major reasons: his publicity-addicted father and CAIR promoted it, and Barack Obama made it into a national news story by tweeting "cool clock, Ahmed" even though the president hadn't yet seen a picture of the device which looked like it should have been disarmed by a sweating, cursing Bruce Willis as the seconds tick down to zero.
Subsequently, Ahmed was "damaged" by receiving truckloads of goodies from tech corporations, offers of scholarships from colleges, guest shots on scads of televisions shows, and an invitation to the White House, as well as being named "Young Muslim of the Year" and getting the opportunity for his family to visit the United Nations and trash talk our country.
The family eventually announced that it was moving to Qatar to enjoy the more civilized and tolerant nature of a Muslim country, but now seems to have second thoughts about living under a system in which you can be beaten to death with rocks for filing baseless nuisance lawsuits like this one.
NOTE: HOPE N' CHANGE IS TAKING FRIDAY OFF. WE WISH YOU AND YOURS A VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING AND WE'LL SEE YOU ON MONDAY!