Friday, March 23, 2012

Friday Free-For-All

READERS - I'm trying something a bit different today. There were several topical stories which suggested cartoons to me, but nothing that quite felt big enough to really command the page and deserve a full commentary. So here's a Friday buffet for you to pick and choose from!

This cartoon was inspired by Obama's ridiculous posturing in which he's suddenly presenting himself as the drillingest, oiliest, most pipeline-lovin' president this old country has ever seen. The quote about enough pipeline to "encircle the Earth" was too tempting for me to pass up.

Meanwhile, Barry just put on his frowny face and ordered his administration to speed up the tiny little bit of the Keystone XL pipeline which will run between Oklahoma and Texas (carrying no oil from Canada, obviously). Unfortunately, the Bamster has
no authority to speed up that section of pipeline and, in fact, probably couldn't prevent it from being built if he wanted to. But he desperately wants to look like he's doing something and the MSM is happily playing along.

Already-worried conservatives got a punch in the gut this week when one of Mitt Romney's top campaign aides assured a CNN reporter that Mitt's growingly conservative stance on the primary trail wouldn't hurt him with moderates in the general election because "you hit a reset button. Everything changes. It's almost like an Etch a Sketch - you can kind of shake it up and restart all over again."

It was easy to interpret the remark as meaning that Romney can put on a good show for the conservative rubes, but once he locks up the nomination you can give him a few shakes and -
voila! - the moderates will get a new picture of a RINO.

Hope n' Change
is hoping that this was just a very, very, very, very poor choice of words. (Gulp!)

And one other thing: anyone who is a "moderate" these days is either not paying attention, is an idiot, or both.

With all the hubbub about gas prices, it struck me that you could easily draw a comparison to healthcare costs. Obama claimed that by giving away free healthcare to 30 million people, it would "bend the cost curve down" thanks to the government making it mandatory for everyone else to pay up or face punishment.

Using that same logic, doesn't it seem like there should be an ObamaCar service station on every corner, bending the cost curve down by giving away gas free to
some people and charging others out the wazoo? It's funny how applying the "logic" behind Obamacare to something as simple as a gas station shows the absurdity of the economic arguments.

Wait, did I say "funny?" I meant tragic.



Steve Burri said...

Stilton, when you die are you going to donate your brain to the Cartoon Science Institute? We may learn much from literally picking your brain and future generations will need the knowledge!

Coon Tasty said...

Well, The One certainly is oily and if rumour be true, he loves a big old "pipe"...

John Robert Mallernee said...

Dr. Jarlsberg:

I copied and posted all three (03) of the comic strips on my web site, "OUR ETERNAL STRUGGLE", giving you full credit (or blame?), while also mentioning your other creation, "JOHNNY OPTIMISM", which of course, is my favorite comic strip.

As I was creating the post for my web site, it occurred to me that your sense of humor bears a striking resemblance to Walt Kelly, who created the famous "POGO" comic strips that I used to read when I was a boy.

Thank you.

John Robert Mallernee
Armed Forces Retirement Home
Gulfport, Mississippi 39507

Pete(Detroit) said...

Someone needs to explain to him the difference b/n 'building a pipeline' and 'laying pipe'...

NEED to get O out of office, also need to bury Mitt in real Conservative Tea party type congress critters to keep him honest...

Obamacar, popularly known as ANY thing w/ an electric drive, (either hybrid OR all battery) not just the Volt. Plugged in an powered by wind / solar / unicorn farts (as coal is being removed from the system). Subsidized (paid for) by all of us already. Of course, all the $$ goes to wealthy 1% types who BUY these silly expensive toys, or "run" these silly expensive companies and give kickbacks to his campaign fund... NONE of which benefits The Poor at all. For "People's Gas" shop Citgo / Valero - wholly owned by (T)Hugo Chavez...

Emmentaler Limburger said...

The Etch-A-Sketch debacle is hilarious to me. I read the Patriot Post (and comment on their pages as Emmentaler Limburger as well...

Emmentaler Limburger said...

GADS I hate this new comment interface.

Anyway, as I was saying, Alexander had put as "upright" several editorial comments pretty much saying "the race is over, Romney's the candidate, no other has a chance, get used to it." You know: the supposed conservative press taking a page from the MSM playbook and trying to drive a conclusion before any is available. So, in the comments, I took Alexander to tassk for continuously featuring this type of crap as "upright" when it is conjecture, and many of the similes they drew in at least one of them could be read to construe that RINOmney is much like Øbama (imagine!). In my comment, I pointed out that there was still a lot of "news time" between now and the selection of the nominee. Within hours, the "Etch-A-Sketch" comment was made.

I hate your Øbamacar cartoon, by the way. Why? I'm absolutely sure someone in the Øbama administration, having read that, is this minute running into the Øval office, yelling "Boss! Boss! De Plane!". Oh! Wrong fantasy. I meant: ""Boss! Boss! I've got a really great idea on gas prices!"...

Colby said...

Wow, Stilton! A triple header!

The first reminded me of the Movie "Grumpy Old Men" when Burgess Meredith proclaimed, "I've laid more pipe in this town than Wabeshaw (sp) Plumbing!" Does dumbass realize the the Earth is 24,000 miles around? Yes, he probably does, but the morons who dote on his every word have not a clue how big the Earth is. The same morons also do not understand that a pipeline from OK to TX is not going to bring in oil from Canada. I'm waiting for hte day when Barry-O brags about building the second half of a bridge to nowhere.

Mitt? Now does anybody, INCLUDING Newt and Rick, really believe that Romney's campaign manager was using the Etch-a-Sketch bit to let us know that Romney would become a complete Socialist after he gets nominated? C'mon Man! The guy just had a Biden moment. Yes, if nominated, Mitt will no doubt steer to the center, but he dare not go left. And are we really supposed to believe Rick or Newt would NOT steer to center?

Obamacar? Stilton! Please stop giving Obama ideas!

REM1875 said...

Thank you x3

Anonymous said...

Even though the Republicans are right than an etch-a-sketch would make a better President than he-who-should-not-be-named, it's an insult to run one.

TheOldMan said...

@Pete Valero is not wholly owned by Venezuala, aka Chavez. It does (did?) buy much of its crude from PDVSA because its refineries spsecialize in handling cheaper, sourer crude.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Steve Burri- Not only am I donating my brain to science, I'm doing my best to pickle it even before it goes into a jar.

@Coon Tasty- Which would explain why Obama wears his "Drill Here, Drill Now" T-shirt with the words in the back.

@John Robert Mallernee- I wouldn't be surprised if Walt Kelly's influence sneaks into my humor, because I've loved Pogo my entire life (and have a shelf of Pogo paperback collections in my library). Not only was Kelly a wonderful and hilarious writer, but artistically Pogo was one of the best drawn comics ever.

@Pete(Detroit)- Regarding Mitt, I have my concerns but I can not go along with Santorum's pronouncement that Obama would be preferable to Romney. No, he wouldn't. And if we don't pry him out of the Whitehouse in 2012, I don't know if there will be any nation left to save by 2016.

@Emmentaler- As a comedic writer, I knew instantly that the "Etch-a-Sketch" comment would catch fire. It's concrete and easy to make jokes about. Frankly, I just think it was a brain fart by Mitt's spokesperson and isn't really anything to worry about. Well, any more than we already were (grin).

But I agree that "it ain't over until it's over." I don't know how anyone who has been watching this primary season can ever think things are wrapped up, because it's been unbelievably volatile to date.

And maybe I shouldn't have mentioned "ObamaCar." It actually makes every bit as much sense as Obamacare, and might be seized on by this administration has another way to "help" us. Gulp.

@Colby- The pipeline from Oklahoma to Texas will bring Canadian long as the oil was transported from Canada to Oklahoma on one of Warren Buffet's trains.

@REM1875- You're welcome welcome welcome.

@Anonymous- I'd agree, but I don't think Mitt is actually an Etch-a-Sketch. As Colby mentioned, he'll probably drift more to the center if elected, but if we have the right people in the House and Senate, it should still be a combination infinitely better than what we've been faced with in recent years.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@TheOldMan- Thanks for the additional information as well as the chance to see the words "cheap sour crude" applied to something other than me for a change.

Colby said...

I, too, am getting the old brain ready for the jar. I just hope they don't label it Abby Normal.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Colby- On the other hand, you might end up with an enormous schwanzstucker and a hot wife calling you "zipper neck."

CenTexTim said...

Three for three - a good day at bat.

I can't believe obama had the unmitigated gall to take credit for the southern extension of the Keystone pipeline. Like you pointed out, he had nothing to do with it and couldn't stop it if he wanted to.

I also can't believe the MSM is letting him get away with it.

Actually, after thinking about it a little more I can believe both those things.

One thing that obama and his media lapdogs conveniently leave out of their pipeline comments is that the application for it was submitted back in 2008. I know the government is slow and inefficient, but c'mon - four years to review it, and they're still complaining they're being rushed? GMAFB.

As for obamacar - please don't give him any ideas. We know he can't differentiate between reality and the world he lives in. That suggests he can't tell the difference between satirical humor and a proposed new policy initiative.

Speaking of Walt Kelly, the tag line for my blog is "We have met the enemy, and he is us." Sound familiar?

John the Econ said...

1) This president's energy stance is absurd, and that people are even debating it is even more absurd. Obama wants Euro-level energy prices. Barack, man-up and admit it and convince us that it's the right thing to do. All you are doing now is convincing us that you're a liar.

And what's the deal? 4 years ago, you were hailed as the greatest communicator. Now you have to rely upon George Clooney to tell us that you're actually a great leader, except that you're just unable to convince anyone of that.

2) Like I've been saying here for a year, the GOP is about to nominate another "squishy". But I like the Etch-a-Sketch metaphor even better. The problem is that you don't have the media Teflon that Clinton & Obama get. Unlike with Obama's energy policy, which virtually every MSM pundit has seemingly forgotten all about, every flop-flop for Romney will be well documented and repeated.

3) Don't laugh. This is inevitable. Let me explain:

Energy prices (along with the cost of everything else) is going to continue to rise. This will be devastating to the "poor". (Inflation taxes the poor & middle class far more brutally than the rich) So eventually, either via the tax code or some other federal program or mechanism, fully expect subsidized energy for favored Democratic-voting constituencies. Over time, these program will be expanded will into the middle class, just as Medicade is.

It's just another way to slowly implement Marxism in America.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@CenTexTim- Actually there's been plenty of time to review the Keystone XL pipeline and it was cleared on more than one occasion. Obama killed it to appeal to the radical environmental Left, period.

And Walt Kelly coined many great phrases. Although "We Have Met The Enemy..." is best known, at times of stress and/or excitement I've been known to proclaim "Hoo-ey! The Jute mill is exploded!" Which certainly confuses the non-Pogo fans around me.

@John the Econ- Obama wants more expensive gasoline, period. He's said so, Chu has said so, and the fact that he's shrugging and saying "hey, look over there!" doesn't change a thing.

Regarding the Etch-a-Sketch, let's take a worst case scenario and say that it's true. But the two controls (horizontal and vertical) will be in the hands on the House and Senate if all goes well. I can live with that.

And regarding ObamaCar, I had mixed feelings the moment it struck me. It did strike me as being entirely possible...but you make a good case that something very like this might actually be inevitable.

Jim Hlavac said...

Our political times are such mush that it is indeed often impossible to pick the best story to use as the lead; I have a blog, I have the same problem. Good job for trying.

And our times are such mush that no one running -- Newt, Rick, Ron or Mitt, or Obama, have an earthly clue to how to change anything, nor do I think they want to. While the rhetoric of both parties often seems at loggerheads, the actions of both parties are despairingly similar. All this "bipartisanship" is nothing but a "one party state."

I have contented for decades that only a principled Libertarian president can get us out of the morass. Gary Johnson is running for that party. The Demopublicans are simply two peas in a rotten pod. And like that old movie about the pod people, (invasion of the body snatchers?, hmm) our current political mush heads just mumble the same mush about "fundamental change" for our nation, and then do absolutely nothing but add more government to the mix.

The four Republicans are all for more government, as is Obama -- the difference is in the sales pitch, the product is the same.

Jim said...

Number three, especially, needs to be shown EVERYWHERE. Love the comics, you do a great job.

txGreg said...

Even jokes regarding this President laying pipe, and mentioning the FLOTUS should not be read near lunchtime <>.

I hope I'm wrong, but I fear the Southern end of the Keystone Pipeline is being put in place for the same reason the entire line is desired. It will not be for relief at the pump for most of us... It will instead be for relief at the wallet for the oil producers, as they get their oil more cheaply transported down to the Gulf Coast for shipping to other, more lucrative markets.

If "we the people" get more than a minimal benefit from it, I'll be pleasantly surprised.

Pete (Detroit) said...

Old Man - Thx for the correction, I had been misinformed!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Jim Hlavac- I often feel the same way. Ron Paul is not my candidate of choice, but the seismic shifts he wants in many areas strike me as being exactly right.

@Jim- Thank you. I'm talking to a friend about a possible way of expanding upon the cartoon to get more people to see it. There's always mischief going on here in the stately HnC Office Towers.

@txGreg- It's entirely possible that things will go as you say, with gas refined here and then sold overseas. Which is, in fact, what Obama says determines the price of gas: the world market.

But at least some of "we the people" would have benefitted from the 200,000 jobs which the pipeline would create. There were finally some real shovel-ready jobs for the taking (which wouldn't cost taxpayers a dime)... and Obama decided he wouldn't touch them with a 10-foot...pipe.

@Pete(Detroit)- Well, you know how it gets when guys get together and start winking, elbow-nudging, and trashtalking about cheap sour crude and light sweet crude. Seriously, we're just animals sometimes.

Emmentaler Limburger said...

@CenTexTim: I also can't believe the MSM is letting him get away with it.

Get away with it?! Shit! THey're COMPLICIT in it!

Anonymous said...

Thanks all for the disgusting mind picture of Obowmore "laying pipe". I now have that firmly engraved on my mental eyeballs, with the First Food Kommissar, standing by to make sure he eats his arugula, for stamina don't ya know.
As in all things ... he approves a pipeline that he has no approval authority for ... and then takes credit for the action of inaction. It's the Democrat response to everything ... I voted for it, before I voted against it!

As for the etch a sketch ... Santorum and Gingrich have no room to talk since neither of them has been consistently conservative. Santorum doesn't spend much time on the campaign trail bragging about his Senatorial loss. Why is that? Is it because anyone who knows him from those days, knows that he scammed the people of Pennsylvania out of education dollars for his kids, while his family was living with him in Virginia? Who did he think he was? Robert Kennedy?
I won't hold you accountable if we end up with the Obamacar program. $10.00/gal gas ... my former co-worker who is still working in Crete, told me this week that they are paying 2Euro a liter for gas now. So, Secretary Chu would just barely be achieving his stated goal of bringing us up to European gas prices if they jacked them to $10.
It must be wonderful to be so rich, that a $40000 car that can run for 40 miles between charges, is considered cost effective cars for the masses.

Suzy said...

HAHAHAHA all these are great today!!!!!

Hey I want ObamaCar.....I think I deserve for the evil rich to fill my gas tank so I can go buy a new iPhone. Yep.

Suzy said...

(I'm still chuckling about the first one!!!!! HA!)

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Emmentaler- Yeah, there's a definite juxtaposition of "cause and effect" going on there.

@elcedar- Yes, the whole "laying pipe" imagery is pretty bad. My only defense is that I didn't start it.

Regarding who is or isn't a consistent Conservative, maybe none of the current candidates is the answer to our prayers - but all are better than the president who is consistently NOT Conservative (or even Constitutional).

Regarding gas prices, the Volt would be an idiotic choice at $40k, but thanks to subsidies each one costs taxpayers more like $200k. You want fuel-efficiency from a tested technology? Give everyone in America a freakin' Moped. It would be worlds cheaper and would actually work. Which is, of course, NOT what the government wants.

@Suzy- Why shouldn't those evil rich jerks pay more for EVERYthing so everyone else can pay less? Why is this a good idea for healthcare and taxes, but not for gas, food, and everything else?

Emmentaler Limburger said...

As a plus, giving everyone a moped will eventually begin reducing the population, obviating the need to pay for abortions! Hand twinkles up! Hand twinkles up!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Emmentaler- Bonus! Plenty of donatable organs for transplantations!

Airotciv said...

*pouts* Aw... I like the comics too. But I'm an idiot that doesn't pay attention (Yep. Moderate! ;) )

I seriously was giggling at the three, though the last one scares me a bit when I think about it because it might happen...

Er, anyway, keep up the amusing work!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Airotciv- Glad you enjoyed the comics. And frankly, people of all political persuasions are welcome here to share opinions as long as it's done respectfully. By some standards, some of my views might be considered moderate or even liberal. Not many, I'll grant - but friendly, intelligent discussion is always appreciated.

Guy Manningham said...

Obamacar is spot on analysis. I would laugh if I weren't crying.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Guy Manningham- Trust me, I spend most of my waking hours not knowing whether to laugh or cry. Glad you liked the cartoon!