Monday, February 18, 2013

Par for the Coarse

obama, obama jokes, vacation, tiger woods, OJ, stilton jarlsberg, hope and change, hope n' change, conservative, golf, coffee couple

Now that Barack Obama has a "clean desk" (having taken care of unemployment, sexual and racial inequality, the healthcare system, nuclear threats from North Korea and Iran, staggering debt, and Ambassador Stevens' death at the hands of YouTube fanatics) he's enjoying a little well-earned time off during his "President's Day" vacation.

Specifically, Barry flew to Florida for golf lessons with a $1000-an-hour pro, and to shoot a few rounds of golf with serial wife-cheater Tiger Woods - perhaps giving the two a chance to compare which is the bigger liar.

In the interest of Black History Month, Hope n' Change thinks it is a sadly missed opportunity that OJ Simpson and Michael Vick weren't there to fill in the president's foursome, if only because the jokes would write themselves for days (OJ: "I'll look for the real killer!" BARRY: "I'll look for real deficit reduction!" TIGER: "Damn - that woman over there is a real dog." VICK: "I wonder if she can fight?")

Sadly, Michelle Obama wasn't able to join the president in Florida owing to the fact that she was taking her daughters (allegedly his, too) on their annual ski vacation in Colorado. Of course, we don't want to place undue significance on the fact that Mr. and Mrs. Obama prefer to vacation hundreds of miles apart from each other, and instead believe that it was simply a case of figuring out what would be the most expensive for taxpayers.

In any event, Hope n' Change Cartoons wishes all of our readers a very happy President's Day, and hopes you'll take some time to reflect on what this day is really about. Drinking.

presidents day, obama, obama jokes, washington, lincoln, stilton jarlsberg, oval office, hope n' change, hope and change
We're pretty sure this really happens every year.


DirtClub said...

What, he's not shooting any Skeets?

A Nonny Mouse said...

Lolol, excellent, as always, Kaesemeister, had a really good laugh at the twist! Thanks! My imaginary alter ego (the only one of us medically at liberty to imbibe) has been drinking since he discovered they'd stopped honoring a Mr Lincoln's and a Mr Washington's birthdays as individually worthy of national note. I'd like to see the generic "presidents day" ashcanned and a return to honoring, not to mention learning about, some great men without lumping the presidential mistakes into the celebration. In fact, I'd be much happier if in the future we added "Incarceration Day" to celebrate the calm and uneventful arrests of over 500 elected criminals, plus all of a select group of executives and their appointees, several thousand lobbyists, corporate gangsters and global banksters. Wish our sheriffs could find out from Iceland how to make it 'stick' at the big finance level. "Happy Incarceration Day" wold be heard far and wide and, who knows, it could be a day to wear festive orange jumpsuits, imprinted with the likeness of your favorite convict with his/her image and rap sheet embroidered by computer on the back. With the caption,"Lest we forget again."

Jim Hlavac said...

That's funny, he never needed a national holiday to go golfing before. Neither he nor his wife seemed to have needed some official day off to be on vacation.

Of course, I love how he and she hang out only with the richest folks. No doubt, while in Florida he'll make another complaint about global warming -- for nothing says disliking global warming than flying huge jets to tropical charms.

I wonder, in all that heat, if he'll have a glass of water and destroy his political career if the press sees him do it.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@DirtClub- I predict Barry will be doing a lot more skeet shooting so he'll be able to protect us from incoming meteors.

@A Nonny Mouse- My suggestion that people stay liquored up during Obama's second term are tongue in cheek. Not that it's bad advice.

"Incarceration Day" is ripe with potential and I'd love to see it enacted. There are already some big, solid-looking structures in Washington DC which could house the wicked - all we need to do is add iron bars and guard towers.

@Jim Hlavac- Reading about the Obamas' $900 Valentine dinner, the separate vacations, and shmoozing with the rich and famous does make me shake my head about the accusations that Mitt Romney was "out of touch" with the little people.

You make a good point about the first family's huge and growing "carbon footprint" while the rest of us can't even be trusted to choose our own lightbulbs.

TC said...

You have to really admire Barry's will power to not vacation in Colorado where marijuana is now legal. Perhaps he intends to join his family there later after he gets life tips from Tiger?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@TC- I think Barry avoids skiing vacations because he doesn't want to risk the possibility that the world will see him fall on his ass while on the bunny slope. Although to be perfectly fair, perhaps it's simply that he loves playing golf more than he likes doing things with his daughters. Or, as he occasionally refers to them on the campaign trail, "my sons."

Ricko from Georgia said...

Reflection, that time in one's life when little things like FACT tend to rise up and bite one's butt...

John the Econ said...

Personally, I prefer it when he's golfing. Every minute on the golf course is one less minute implementing ways to destroy the America I loved.

@Jim Hlavac, you are on fire today. Kudos.

And might I mention the AWOL NFM, which never missed an opportunity to criticize GOP Presidents who usually took their relatively inexpensive vacations at their own modest homes.

Reagan's ranch house would literally be considered inadequate quarters for the Obama's dog.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Ricko from Georgia- I'm pretty sure "fact" is the only four-letter word the Left doesn't like.

@John the Econ- I don't really mind Barry golfing, for the very reason you mention.

I will say that I'm impressed that Barry doesn't even try to pretend to practice austerity in his personal life. But I guess he's only willing to affect false postures when they don't actually interfere with his luxuries.

John the Econ said...

@Stilton, if there's one lessons that has been thoroughly put to bed over the last several years, it's that "austerity" is very rarely practiced by those who have unfettered access to other people's money.

Colby said...

Well, I took your advice, Stilton, and I'm currently sucking down my second Guinness in honor of our first black, Irish presidente. Actually, I lie. I'm sucking down my second Guinness trying to take my mind off the ass wipe, but obviously, it isn't working.

I will restate my desire for our country to fund 52 weeks per year, unlimited vacations for ass wipe and his Wookie because it would save us SO MUCH MONEY, even if they blew a cool million bucks a day.

AND.... why the heck do meteors fall in remote regions of Russia instead of DC? Just think of how much life would suck if we didn't have our beloved gubmint looking out for us and making laws to help us out? Why, it boggles the mind to imagine it!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@John the Econ- It's an interesting phenomenon, isn't it? Is Barry really doing his "fair share" for the rabble when he has a $900 dinner instead of a couple of Big Macs? The sonofagun loves spending other peoples' money while attacking them for having earned it in the first place.

Imagine what our country could be like if Obama believed in "austerity" instead of "audacity"...

@Colby- I appreciate your directness, sir. Currently, I'm sipping an unprepossessing table wine (cheap and tart, rather like a common streetwalker) to take my mind off the asswipe. And it isn't really working yet, but there's still wine in the box.

I would love to see Barry go on vacation for the next four years. It could all be lobster, golf, and orgies as far as I'm concerned - as long as he'd stop screwing up our country.

Regarding meteors, I'm rather glad that the most recent one didn't come down on Washington. Numbnuts would have thought it was an attack and order nuclear missiles launched. Probably targeting Israel.

JustaJeepGuy said...

It's that darn global warming that is making those meteors fall! Doesn't everyone know that? And it's that dirty U.S. government making them fall on that formerly near-heaven-on-earth, Russia!

I've been expecting to read news that Barack Hussein played golf with Tiger Woods for years now. Is this really the first time it's happened?

Irene Peduto said...

Stilton - loved the foursome quotes. I remember that Bush took a beating from the "press" for eight years over his vacationing at his home in TX. These elites who now "occupy" the WH do not have to conform to any sort of austerity measures. They are more like celebrities - this isn't going to go away anytime soon. The adoration of the "low-information voter" (as Rush says) are totally supportive of anything he does. That's because they truly believe what he says. So many years ago my mother taught me to believe what people do rather than what they say. What's happened to America?
@John the Econ - O's unfettered access to other peoples' money is so apparent to anyone who isn't blinded by his celebrity. I remember when women were fainting in his early campaigning (thanks to Oprah). He has been given permission by "the people" to spend, spend, spend.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@JustaJeepGuy- Not only do dirty coal-fired electrical plants attract meteors, but the smoke plumes from those meteors cause even more global warming! And I'm pretty sure that incandescent lightbulbs cause solar flares, too.

I believe this is the first time Barry has golfed with Tiger Woods. Also, actual news reports that I'm not making up say that on the return from Florida, Reggie Love got off Air Force One - so it's possible that he and Barry also got a chance to play a couple of holes. So to speak.

@Irene Peduto- It seems like when Bush was on "vacation," he was usually doing things like chopping firewood, wearing ratty clothes, and working up an honest sweat.

And at this point, there is no difference between politicians and celebrities - especially in Obama's case. Others have called him the "Kardashian President" and I think that's extremely accurate. He's all (and only) aura.

Sarah Rolph said...

ROFLMAO about the press complaining bitterly about not being allowed near Obama and Tiger (laughing because they chose such a trivial thing to complain about, when there are so many actual outrages they should be citing):

But this story about the press complaining about the White House constantly stonewalling them is very nice to see. This meaty must-read is actually a distillation of the original story:

Sarah Rolph said...

Links don't seem to have come through as links, sorry--is there something I can do to preseve their functionality when I paste them in? I guess you can paste them into your browser...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Sarah Rolph- Even when the press DO get access to Barry, they're afraid to ask any questions of importance. So I guess they don't actually mind being puppets, they just don't like having the Whitehouse show that they're puppets.

Regarding sharing links, it's a bit of a pain to actually make them clickable here on Blogger. You have to wrap the URL in a bunch of HTML code which I personally can't remember (I use a program called BlogAssist to help me with it).

If you have a more supple mind, you can use the code on this page and learn how to do it without any additional software.