Monday, August 8, 2016

Wreckonomics 101

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, hillary, economy, wall street, liar

Far be it from us to put words (or, like Bill Clinton, anything else) in Hillary's mouth, but as nearly as we can tell this is actually the economic plan that the former first lady is pitching to voters in the event she's made Demon-queen of the United States: she will attack the only economic sector which isn't actively collapsing.

Of course, unlike Bernie Sanders, Hillary is utterly insincere in her claims to be Wall Street's worst enemy. She relies on their donations, their political influence, and their willingness to pay millions upon millions of dollars to Chelsea's numbnut husband who recently lost 90% of the value of a hedgefund he was running.

Mind you, she's not completely lying about changing Wall Street least when it comes to poor schnooks like those in the middle class who just want to build their retirement accounts. Hillary is currently planning on making it more difficult and expensive for anyone to invest (citizens will be required to work with government-certified investment counselors who will charge hefty fees), as well as making it harder to buy and sell stocks without hanging onto them for extended periods.

The rationale isn't hard to figure out: Progressives are against anything which might further enable individualism and prudent investing. Basically, the Left gives you only two choices: you can be a ward of the state, or an enemy of the state. And if Hillary is elected, those choices will get real teeth.

But on a lighter note...

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We think Hillary Clinton deserves an Olympic trophy for the most bizarre - and yet most believable - political statement of the last week.

When it was pointed out that she claimed FBI Director Comey had said she was entirely truthful in her statements about her secret private email server (when videotape showed him saying exactly the opposite), the fast-thinking cyborg started wafting wifts of smoke from her ears, vibrating wildly, then gasped that the discrepancy in statements occurred because she had a "short-circuit."

Frankly, we admire her candor in finally coming out of the cyber-closet and admitting that she's an Assembled-American. And despite being inhuman, we'll also point out that if she's elected (albeit electrified) that it will still represent a historic shattering of the flesh ceiling.


James Daily said...

Stilt: That would be tough with the pic of a lesion I saw on her tongue. Hope you saw the pic of Hillary helping two younger men up some steps. I digress. Mainly, we are in a world of hurt if she waddles into the oval office. Right now, I am hoping that her real problem is, as someone pointed out, Polymyositis. Ya never know.

Fred Ciampi said...

Stilt, was there a Freudian Slip in the second paragraph? Or is it supposed to be like that? Oh, the confusion.... Oh, the humanity.... Who's going to take care of our daughters? Besides me, that is. It's early out today.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@James Daily- I saw the lesion pic but haven't seen follow-up on it; I'm now wondering if what looked like a hole was actually a cough lozenge sticking to her tongue. The picture of Hillary needing help up steps was interesting; some have suggested she has spatial orientation problems after her head injury - yet another reason for her to be overwhelmed by falling balloons.

@Fred Ciampi- D'oh! Yes, I've reached a point in my dotage in which I don't even bother with simple typos. No, I prefer to insert an entirely inappropriate word - in this case, replacing "dollars" with "daughters." Mind you, I was talking about Chelsea's husband, so I imagine the word "daughter" was banging around in my head and the shipping department said "what the hell" and sent it to my hands for final delivery.

The error has now been fixed, and I apologize for being even more confusing than usual (grin).

Judi King said...

I wonder if those of us who choose to be enemies of the state will be placed before a firing squad? Her health? We will never be told the truth, at least not until she wins the election.

Geoff King said...

Evidently Hillary's brain isn't the only thing that is short-circuited. The hag even needs assistance walking up stairs:

Rod said...

Decades of lies, deception, money grubbing & generally screwing-up everything with which she has been associated might take their toll, even with this cold bitch.

IT'S NOT PERFECTLY CLEAR, but there may be favorable and perhaps Godly outcome to all this. Hillary defeats the Donald; dies before inauguration or electoral college action (and goes directly to Hell); state electoral college laws cause confusion and the matter goes the House for vote or to the Speaker of the House in Succession. Yes, a long shot, but for now I just wish the media would start highlighting Clinton's difficulties and debating THIS hypothetical anywhere near as much as they are serving as fully transparent attack dogs for Democrats.

John the Econ said...

It takes a total disconnect from history and critical intellect to believe anything that comes from that woman's mouth. So on one hand, she says she's running on the "economic miracle" of the first Clinton Administration, and yet completely repudiates all of the Clinton policies that contributed to the economic boom that took place during the latter half of the '90s. On one hand she lauds the "success" of the Obama era, where the only segment of America that has truly prospered are the rent seekers and Wall Street. So in the wake of that success, she has to propose trillions of dollars of more government to remediate that success. And yet Wall Street is still giving her millions?

In the end, it really doesn't matter. She's just spewing what she think she needs to buy off enough of Bernie's kids and what's left of the middle class that won't pull the lever for Trump. Just as Wall Street owned Obama, she IS Wall Street. After all, why would Wall Street exclusively fund candidates that spend most of their time attacking Wall Street? Because they don't believe a word of it.

The fact is that she can't deliver much of it. She'll have no mandate. She still won't control Congress. She'll plod along doing the sleazy bidding for those funneling money to the fully-owned Democrats and herself through the Clinton Foundation, or whatever mechanism they have in the queue to replace it. She'll try to expand on the Obama attempts to rule by executive fiat, but I don't think she's going to have an easy time with that. In the wake of Trump, the GOP is going to realize that if they ever want to be relevant again, they're going to have to grow some nads and hold the Executive branch accountable in a way they utterly neglected to with Obama.

At least I can hope.

Re lying: Once again, the only surprise is that people are surprised by this. She doesn't care what you or I know or think. She's just got to convince enough low-fo Dem-bots that she's got their back and this is all just part of the "vast right-wing conspiracy". It worked last time. It's all about the Electoral College at this point. Truth is irrelevant in that context.

Freudian slip: Every so often, she does slip up and actually tell the truth:

We Are Going To Raise Taxes On The Middle Class

Accidents happen.

Colby Muenster said...

And she says TRUMP is unfit to be President? I actually think he has a pulse and brain activity. Not so sure about her. Ever see "Weekend at Bernies?" (different Bernie, BTW). I would not be the least surprised to find out she is already dead, and her minions have installed a robotic mouth that they control like a ventriloquist's dummy. All they have to do is sync it up with a soundtrack (which has been mostly successful), and add an evil cackle here and there. As Trump has pointed out, it's been over 8 months since she held an actual press conference. Her public appearances are all under circumstances that can be carefully controlled. Hmmm....

@John the Econ,
Yup... A President Shrillary would just be status quo and more of the same do-nothing policies. I figure the country could actually survive her ineptitude fairly unscathed other than A) the additional umpteen bazillion in national debt, and B) the 3 or 4 uber liberal SCOTUS judges she would sneak through that appear conservative at first glance.

The Republicans brought this situation on themselves. They created Trump AND Obama. We can only pray they have learned something from the situation they find themselves in, but I sincerely doubt it.

John the Econ said...

@Colby Muenster, you are right. Wanna piss off your Democrat friends, just tell them that the only reason Trump is a threat to them is because their assigned candidate is such a transparently inept and corrupt disaster. If they had only run a decent human being, they'd have won in November with a landslide.

On the other hand, if the GOP had been anything more than a mere opposition party during the Bush (43) and Obama eras, they wouldn't have faced a fed-up electorate disgusted enough to nominate an actual Democrat who's a total boor. They could have run a block of wood, and still defeated Hillary.

Again, this is where the "lesser of two evils" has taken us. How low can we go?

Geoff King said...

IMHO, a vote for Trump IS a vote for Clinton. They are two sides of the same coin. As John the Econ so eloquently stated "this is where the lesser of two evils has taken us".
I believe this upcoming election is possibly the most crucial in US history. Either the Corporate Globalist Elite will win for the status quo as usual, or a third party candidate will rise up and change politics forever.
No, I do not expect my candidate-Gary Johnson-to win, but if a large percent of those who feel they must vote for Trump in order to stop Clinton, and those Sander's supporters who feel abandoned by their own party would simply choose Option #3, we no longer will be the only free nation on the planet that is restricted to just two barely different parties to decide between.

American Cowboy said...

After reading Mr King's comment at 8:02 AM above and perusing the referenced article I found it said this, "Clinton. . .is taking Armour Thyroid. . . a natural remedy made from desiccated pig glands."

Would this be considered cannibalism?

Anonymous said...

My favorite video is of Hillary yelling that she is going to raise taxes on the middle class. And of her mindless audience wildly cheering. A Freudian slip or was she for once telling the truth?

TrickyRicky said...

@Geoff King- No, a vote for Hillary is a vote for Hillary. A vote for Trump is a vote for Trump and/or a vote against Hillary. Should Hillary win and Johnson were to get 20% of the vote, we will not have three viable parties. We will have a permanent Socialist party cesspool, with the she-beast having named 3-4 new Supremes. Game, set, match. We are well down the road to serfdom, and I agree that this election is the most important of my lifetime, but it is not the time to cast a "principled" vote, it is the time to cast a survival vote.

Geoff King said...

Actually, there seems to be a high possibility that Clinton may not even make it through the year. Her health appears to be deteriorating rapidly, and she may be forced to drop out of the race. In which case, a vote for Clinton or Trump will be a vote for Trump and the globalists. To me, a third party vote is the only sane answer.

Colby Muenster said...

Y'all feel free to scold me for repeating myself.

Trump's list of potential SCOTUS nominees is a good one, and I have no reason to think he would deviate from it, but he could conceivably still appoint less conservative judges.

Shrillary WILL appoint left wing, moonbat, activist judges like Sortamayor, Non-Reagan Kagan, or Darth Vader Ginsberg.

Johnson will appoint no judges.

Apologies to my Libertarian friends, but Tricky Ricky is right; this is no time for a principled vote. I have 7 grandkids; ages 1 through 16. Every day I look at them and nearly cry thinking about the future they will have if that self serving, murderous, lying, bag is elected president. Nope... not risking it!

@American Cowboy,
No... cannibalism is if you eat your own kind. Now if pharma comes up with desiccated satanic demon glands....

John the Econ said...

Hey, Bernie's kids! See this?

Sanders buys $600K summer home

Reward from the Clinton Foundation for shoving ya'll under the bus at the convention? (Along with the ability to continue to draw breath)

How many of you with your 6-figures of student loan debt and $30,000 jobs think you'll ever be able to afford a picturesque $600k summer retreat on a secluded island? Even if your college was free and you were stuck in a $30,000 job with single-payer health care do you think you'll ever be able to afford this after your 50% take-home pay?

I hear Khan got a similar deal too.


Pete (Detroit) said...

Geoff, last I saw, Gary was polling at 13%+
15+, he gets invited to the debates
If he manages to goad either of them into a fit, all bets are off
Can't say that I agree w/ his foreign policy, and he's his own flavor of crazy, but he's not evil, and he's not Trump...

Dan said...

Who ordained the Peoples' Debate Coordinating Soviet (or whatever it is)? Seems that getting on the ballot in all 57 states might be a good enough qualifier.

Anonymous said...

Basically, the Left gives you only two choices: you can be a ward of the state, or an enemy of the state.

Actually they don't care if you're a ward of the state (somebody has to pay for those programs) as long as you're obedient. Obey us or wage war against us, there are your choices. There's very little in-between. You see that in the assaults in the streets leftist mobs make against their opponents. It's a totalitarian mindset that has actually been very successful for them, particularly in the face of the Republican/Conservative business lobby that masquerades as a political party and movement. Now that white conservative voters are on the verge of being disenfranchised in a one-party state by immigration this obey or die fighting reality will become painfully obvious to even the most dense among them. Then they'll obey.

Wahoo said...

Hillary looks so placid and self-contained (like a frickin Walt Whitman poem) between seizures.