Saturday, March 27, 2010

With Friends Like These...

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Over the past year and a half, Barack Obama has made it clear that he will happily tolerate Russia building missile installations, Iran building atomic reactors, and North Korea building nuclear weapons. But in his first real show of presidential resolve and outrage, the president has declared that he will not tolerate Israel building apartments in Jerusalem.

On Tuesday, Obama met behind closed doors with Israeli Prime Minister Binyamin Netanyahu. No photos were taken of the world leaders together because of the acrimony, and Obama eventually walked out of the meeting to eat dinner alone...leaving word that he could be contacted when the insulted Israeli Prime Minister was ready to cave on building housing within Israel's own borders. Instead, the Israeli delegation left the Whitehouse because of concerns that their private discussions were being covertly listened to.

According to one Israeli newspaper,
“The Prime Minister leaves America disgraced, isolated and altogether weaker than when he came.”

The troubling breach of relations between the U.S. and Israel is unprecedented and, to many, absolutely inexplicable. After all, Israel is the only pro-America democracy in the Middle East and...

Oh wait. We just figured out the problem.

Friday, March 26, 2010

No, I Thought YOU Read It

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House Speaker Nancy Pelosi famously said "we have to pass the bill so you can find out what's in it."

Unfortunately, it turns out the Democrats had to pass the bill so they could find out what's in it too.

Oh, they knew about the well-documented kickbacks and bribes they'd be receiving, all of which made it into law. But they didn't know that their 2000-page bill fails to give promised coverage to kids with pre-existing illnesses. They didn't know that their bill lacks the $10 billion in funding the IRS will need to monitor every American for "health insurance compliance."

And they didn't know that the healthcare bill will help fund medications like Viagra for convicted sex offenders. Of course, they know now...and have specifically voted in favor of keeping the "performance enhancing drugs" flowing.

To paraphrase the great political philosopher and screen comedian Oliver Hardy: "This is another fine print mess you've gotten us into!"

Thursday, March 25, 2010

It Gets Better and Better

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Democrats claimed that their Healthcare legislation would help create jobs and, for once,
it turned out they were right. Because the IRS now needs 10 billion dollars (which, oops, the Democrats forgot to factor into their bill) to hire 16,500 new "health insurance enforcement agents."

Yes, the same federal agency that writes
incomprehensible tax forms, conducts life-disrupting audits, and has the power to impose and collect fines will be checking every American, every month, to be sure you own the "right kind" of health insurance. Or else.

That's one small step for giant leap for the IRS.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Laugh Insurance

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Nobody enjoys getting bad news...and the passage of Obamacare is about as bad as it gets, politically speaking. But nothing will make the liberals more nervous (and for good reason) than to see Conservatives feeling upbeat, happy, smiling and motivated.

And there are things to be happy about. For instance, a CNN poll just found that the majority of Americans disapprove of Barack Obama's performance as president. And a CBS poll found that only 11% of Americans view Nancy Pelosi favorably, making her less popular than most STDs.

So put a smile on your face and, if necessary, fake it till you feel it. Hope n' Change will be here to help you laugh...doing our happy monkey dance and throwing feces at the liberals.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Meant To Be Broken

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Yes, the record for "worst attack on America," once held by Osama Bin Laden and Al Qaeda has now been passed to Obama's Been Leadin' and All Democrats.

Trillions in damages? Check.
Loss of freedoms? Check.
Fear about the future? Check.
Death for innocents? Check

Disruption of all aspects of business and personal life? Check and check again.

So Osama, you might as well get used to the idea that you're now just another has-been who'll go into the record books with an asterisk next to your name...

(*Blown to smithereens by a hellfire missile when a Republican takes office in 2012)

The winner and new champion.

Monday, March 22, 2010

One Bill To Rule Them All

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One of the great things about fiction like
"Lord of the Rings" is that you can be fairly sure that pure, unadulterated evil probably won't win in the end. And hopefully, the evil which Barack Obama, Nancy Pelosi, Harry Reid, and a majority of Democrats perpetrated on this country won't win in the end either. But for now they've won a battle. A huge one.

I was a child on a school playground when I heard the P.A. announcement that John F. Kennedy had been shot dead. I was a young man making a radio commercial in a recording studio when a news bulletin announced that the space shuttle had blown to pieces, killing all on board. And I was fully grown, and feeling my age, when a phonecall interrupted my morning coffee to tell me that America was under siege and that the twin towers had fallen in New York.

And now, I'll always remember that I was sitting on the edge of a chair on Sunday March 21st, white-knuckled and watching CSPAN, the night America was betrayed by the Democrats.

The night the
real battle began.

Let's roll.

Sunday, March 21, 2010

How the Deemocrats Became Extinct

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Today's the day that House Democrats will attempt to "deem" a disastrous Healthcare bill passed, under the assumption that "fixes" can be made after it's signed into law.

But many political analysts believe the "fixes" won't make it through the Senate (which already rejected the House's ideas when they wrote their own bill, adding kickbacks, bribes, and abortion language). And it's possible that the House Democrats will throw out "deem and pass" altogether, and do a direct vote to support the publically-hated Senate bill.

Either way, it is the Senate bill which will be the law of the land.

All in all, it suggests that House Democrats really do have walnut-sized brains. And that they should start watching the skies for something huge heading their way...