Saturday, November 28, 2009

GateCrasherGate


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Only months after Al Qaeda proved it could sneak suicide bombers past security using rectal bombs, the Whitehouse let two unauthorized assholes mingle with world leaders at Obama's first state dinner.

Presumably because of his safe, all-American name, Tareq Salahi and his wife were able to walk in without invitations and be photographed with Rahm Emanuel, Joe Biden, and Barack Obama. Security was apparently lax because 9/11 is "so eight years ago," and there hasn't been another successful terrorist attack on U.S. soil for...well...almost 3 weeks.

In any event, to prevent future imposters from getting into the Whitehouse,
Hope n' Change suggests that birth certificates be checked at the door...


UPDATE: there are now reports that the party-crashers have a relationship with Obama going back 5 years, and that Tareq Salahi has served as a Palestinian lobbyist. So perhaps they just got waved in when they said "we're friends of Obama...and enemies of Israel."



Two people who shouldn't be in the Whitehouse...and some party crashers.

Friday, November 27, 2009

An Economy Never Forgets


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With almost 1 in 5 Americans either out of work or underemployed, you'd think that encouraging job growth would be somewhere on the president's radar. But no, he's busy pushing anti-job healthcare measures, anti-job deficit spending, anti-job taxes on small businesses, and posing for GQ Magazine.

Experts say that it could easily be 2012 before the job market sees significant recovery. Which, just coincidentally, is when Obama should be filing for unemployment!

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Giving Thanks


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According to the latest Rasmussen poll, support for the Democrats' healthcare plan has fallen to an all-time low, with only 38% in favor. Only 14% of those polled believe that "healthcare reform" will actually reduce medical costs...and those 14% aren't exactly the sharpest carving knives at the holiday table, if you know what we mean.

Obamacare is especially unpopular with senior citizens, who will be losing their Medicare Advantage plans, taking the brunt of $500 billion in cuts to Medicare and (page 1,637, paragraph C, subsection 2), "be cast adrift on ice floes, their wails and lamentations lost to the crashing waves."

But it hasn't happened yet...and hopefully next year at this time, we'll be giving thanks that it never will. Until then, HAPPY THANKSGIVING from Hope n' Change Cartoons!

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Falling Job Numbers


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Unemployment numbers rose again in October, with more and more people giving up hope of finding jobs (though hopefully they'll keep away from tall buildings and ledges).

To respond to the urgent jobs crisis, Barack Obama took an Asian photo-op tour and reminisced about eating ice cream, invited Khalid Sheikh Mohammed for an all-expenses-paid trip to New York, and demonstrated his support for the common worker by inviting Hollywood's biggest elites to a Whitehouse party.

Obama also plans to hold a "Jobs Summit" in the coming months (hey, no rush...) during which the person who draws the short straw will have to tell the president that there aren't any new jobs. Except for the people who scrape those messy city sidewalks...

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Giving Us The Bird


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Thanksgiving is a time of traditions, and in this very special year of Hope n' Change, what could be more traditional than yet another idiotic and offensive decision from the Whitehouse?

Although Eric Holder insists that "Thanksgiving ham is not an option," many liberals suggest that the government's case against the Turkey has been irreparably damaged by keeping him "caged like an animal," and subjecting him to slurs like "dark meat" and "butterball." According to one unnamed source, said to be very close to the president, "New York's turkeys have come home to roost."

In other court news, the five 9/11 co-conspirators who are heading to New York to stand trial have announced that they will plead "not guilty," in order to publicly present their political positions, attack American foreign policy, decry the "torture" they've suffered, and attempt to justify past (and therefore future) 9/11-style terrorist attacks on the United States for an audience of over one billion Muslims.

Which means that this Thursday, we will not be giving thanks for Eric Holder and Barack Hussein Obama.

Monday, November 23, 2009

Party Politics


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With the holidays approaching, what better time could the president have chosen to announce that he's
slashing the size of the annual Whitehouse recognition of Hanukkah?

Although he recently hosted an extravagant Whitehouse Ramadan banquet, the most debt-loving president in the history of the universe has balked at the expenses involved in serving kosher dishes to Jews. What a schlemiel...

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Rimshot Reid


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Perennial sourpuss Harry Reid finally managed to crack a truly hilarious joke when he declared that his Senate Healthcare Bill is "fully paid for."

Perhaps what he meant to say is that the Democratic votes he needs to ram his plan through have been "fully paid for," including a now-infamous payment of $300 million taxpayer dollars to Senator Mary Landrieu (D-La).

In any event, the Senate gave Harry Reid the 60 votes he needed (all Democrats) to advance his healthcare bill to the next step - so for now, the joke is on us.