Friday, April 30, 2010

Mahalo for Nothing


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The state of Hawaii has now passed legislation allowing them to ignore all requests to see Barack Hussein Obama's
actual birth certificate. Which seems like a funny kind of law to pass in a state that should be dealing with economic woes, crushing unemployment, and doctor shortages - but hey, their priorities are their own business.

News services continue to gloss over the fact that Obama's widely published
"Certification of Live Birth" is not a birth certificate, and that the only proof of the original document's existence is a sworn statement by a single individual in Hawaii that she once peeked into the lockbox and saw the real thing.

And if
that's not enough proof that Obama is qualified for the most powerful job in the world, well, you can just get your damn pineapple somewhere else!

Meanwhile, the president continues to whip up hatred against Arizona for requiring proof of US citizenship. Although if any liberal protestors visit Hawaii's
USS Arizona Memorial carrying signs with swastikas, they'd better be prepared for a long swim back to shore. The veterans who guide the solemn tour are getting older...but unlike the president, they're still willing to fight for this country.


16 comments:

Joe said...

I'm afraid I don't get your punchline about the president boycotting the memorial. In your report, you don't say anywhere that he actually IS boycotting it.

I understand he's really unhappy with Arizona right now but it's a stretch to tie that to the memorial in Hawaii.

Maybe he'll do to Hawaii what he did to Fox which is: hold meetings and invite every other state but them and make snide comments to the other states about their intelligence and sense of patriotism...

Joe said...

LOL

He'll tell the USA that Arizona isn't really a state. Then he'll make Puerto Rico a state and demote Arizona to a 'territory' so the Flag will still have 57 stars on it...

Pete(Detroit) said...

I've been to the Memorial
Beautiful, elegant, and moving

Tempting to make a snarky comment about Obama, his taste, or his wife, but I think I'll leave it alone.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Joe- No, the president isn't actually boycotting the Arizona memorial. And in fact, we'll concede that it's a bit of a comedic stretch to try to tie Hawaii, Arizona, birth certificates, and citizenship papers into one neat little 3-panel package. But what's the point of comedy without a little risk-taking?

On a more serious note, and echoing Pete(Detroit), the Arizona Memorial is incredibly moving and sobering. If you've ever wondered what "hallowed ground" is, this is it. And the anger that some of us feel about this administration's dereliction of duty is in direct proportion to the reverence we feel for those who gave their lives in our defense.

Suzy said...

I'm so moving to Arizona....

drozz said...

"Although if any liberal protestors visit Hawaii's USS Arizona Memorial carrying signs with swastikas, they'd better be prepared for a long swim back to shore."

i'm not sure where this comes from...please enlighten me?

otherwise, i really love coming to this site. keep up the good work.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

drozz- Again, this may be a comedic "reach too far" (or, in football terms, a fumble). But because explaining a joke always makes it better (not! - but I'm obligated to try), protestors are now attacking and boycotting anything which they believe to be associated with Arizona, including "Arizona Iced Tea," which is a product of New York. So it's easy to imagine some liberal lunkheads in Hawaii (trust me, there's no lack of them out there) who might think they could grab some publicity by taking their anti-Arizona protests out to the Arizona Memorial; a floating structure above the sunken battleship of the same name.

But it would be a "long swim back" because the memorial is always filled with veterans, old and young, as well as citizens who have been keenly reminded of the cost of our freedoms, and who wouldn't appreciate political desecration of the monument.

There - are you laughing yet? I didn't think so (sigh). But I'm glad you love the site, and I'll redouble my efforts to put in punchlines that don't require dry dissertations (grin)!

Anonymous said...

When applying for a U.S. passport several decades ago, I learned that my "Certificate of Birth" was not an acceptable substitute for an official birth certificate. Obama could put this whole matter to rest by releasing a copy of the birth certificate his mother used to get HIM a U.S. passport to leave Hawaii and travel to Indonesia. Sorry Obama, I think you're hiding something. I just don't know what it is.

drozz said...

@SJ

one would think a boycott of arizona iced t would be just inane.

but yet here we are.

Anonymous said...

First time visitor, good stuff. I'd help toss overboard anyone including a tea partier displaying the swastika on the USS Arizona.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Anonymous- as a "first time visitor," let me give you an official welcome. Hope you'll come back often! And yes, anyone who would show disrespect for the memorial should go into the drink.

Joe said...

Aww, no one commented on my joke about 57 states...

anombrerose said...

I love it. I really love it. Absolutely brilliant stuff. I hope he hasn't tuned out the needling about his BC. I hope he has not been ABLE to tune it out. hehehehehe

- Rose

anombrerose said...

Well, Joe, Is Puerto Rico our new 51st State, yet? With ALL Democrat PROGRESSIVE "elected" "Officials"?

Pete(Detroit) said...

Also - in.re. the 'long swim home' - you reach the "Arizona" memorial via boat - there *is* no land access. And the boat ride starts from across the harbor, NOT from the place the "Arizona" was docked.
Last I knew, it was STILL leaking fuel, at about 1/2 gal / day - as it has for nearly 60 years. Them ships had BIG tanks...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Pete(Detroit)- You're right, the "long swim home" was in reference to the fact that the Arizona Memorial is out in Pearl Harbor...and if you miss the boat ride back (through misbehaving) it means you're in for a swim.

And when I visited the Memorial several years ago, fuel was indeed still leaking. Very sobering.

Joe- I'm sure many people enjoyed your "57 states" joke. I know I did!