Thursday, October 28, 2010

Running On Fumes



When Barack Obama "hits the road" to go campaigning, he increasingly does so with a battered, rusting, fuel-inefficient "car" metaphor that should have been scrapped during the "Cash for Clunkers" program.

We've all heard him say that Republicans "drove the car into a ditch," and that "R is for reverse" and "D is for drive" (ignoring the fact that reverse is, in actuality, the appropriate gear for getting out of a ditch).

But because the president can't get any votes talking about Obamacare, the failed stimulus, or his inaction in the face of disastrous unemployment, he's decided to go into more detail about his imaginary car - telling a Rhode Island audience that it "needs some body work, needs a tuneup. But it's pointing in the right direction. The engine is turning and it's ready to go!"

The audience, in the state with the 4th highest unemployment in the nation, was understandably baffled by the fact that rather than good news, they're getting Mr. Goodwrench.

And they know that what Americans really need is leadership...not just a lube job.
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14 comments:

moronpolitics said...

WRONG ! It the LOOSE NUT behind the wheel ! They keep telling us this guy a great orator. I suspect that all the cracks about the teleprompters got to him and now he is speaking to us directly. Problem: He has no workable ideas. He has only a theoretical background to pull from. I did NOT attend an Ivy League school, but I DID start working for money at 14. Before that I did a lot of work/chores around the house. You learn from solving problems at one job things that apply to others. One of my earliest jobs was washing dishes. Anyone who was on one of my teams very long heard me say sooner or later that "you have to start getting some dishes to the other side of the sink." (excessive planning can be counter productive -- it's amazing how many young kids decide to reinvent dishwashing. Most common is the "discovery" that it's easier to wash all the cups at once, then the 7 inch plates etc. Unfortunately you run out of china while you wait for ALL the cups to come into the back. Then, the restaurant closes -- or you kill the dishwasher. I also did every job in s resturant, 6 or 8 Hotel jobs, warehouse, construction, sales, technical sales, phone, teaching, door to door, truck driving, musical instrument repair, piano player,nurseryman and on and on and on..... Mr.Obama has very few such careers. He taught college, wrote checks and became President. Next....Who knows? Messiah, right? Let's sing!!!!

If I had a Hammer.... I'd hammer in the morning.... I'd hammer in the evening.... Right in his hands.....

anombrerose said...

I love it. These are people that don't even know that a car needs an engine or it isn't going anywhere at all! And they would remove the gas tanks from all vehicles, first thing.

I'd like to stick them every single one in a biosphere created according to their rules and seal them inside it.

- Rose

anombrerose said...

Now that I read my post after it was "published"... wonders... did I watch enough Twilight Zone as a child?


:)

Anonymous said...

Considering what else he, Nancy and Harry have been doing and plan to do to us, a lube job would be... helpful.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

Tuneup??! That non-ASE-Certified, non-professional-at-any-damned-thing moron isn't trying to give our economic engine a tuneup. He's trying to convert a 427 Hemi into a one-cylinder lawn mower engine with a hammer and a coarse file...and he's succeeding! Gott im Himmel, somebody stop the crazy bast*rd.

Emmentaler Limburger said...

Them dem0crats may not know cars, but they seem pretty good at fixing voting machines from what I'm hearing...

alan markus said...

Actually, about 45 years ago America (think of Johnson's Great Society program as the start) bought a ghetto cruiser. After 40+ years of efforts to "pimp" it up, it's proven to be one hell of a clapped-out clunker that should have been cashed out a long time ago. In 2008, Obama promised great hope that a lot more "pimping" of this clunker would reliably transport us to the future.

November 2nd we start looking for a new car.

Since Obama loves the car analogies so much, I hope someone with photoshop talents (that's a hint, Stilton) comes up with a car that symbolizes the Obama Presidency. I would suggest a 58 Edsel - bend that circular Obama symbol so that it overlays that infamous "sucking" oval grille.

John the Econ said...

One thing is for sure: The "Hope and Change" rhetoric they deployed in '08 is conspicuous in its absence this time around.

Pete(Detroit) said...

Yes, we've given up on 'hope' and are FORCING "Change"...

Tom (Rochester) said...

Love your commentary; it's the perfect complement to your cartoons. Your wit is approaching "iowa-hawkesque" proportions (very high praise...).

drjim said...

We already got a lube job. It was back in 2008!
On second thought, maybe it wouldn't have hurt so much if they'd used a little lube!

Colby_Muenster said...

Stilton, your are dead on when you say we need Reverse to get out of a ditch, but is it too late for that? What gear do we use as we are flying over the edge of the cliff? I sure hope the back wheels are still on the ground in January (assuming, of course we are driving an old rear wheel drive clunker. If we are driving a Prius, oh hell!).

I'll sing too.... If I had a hammer.... there would be no Liberals...

pryorguy said...

GOT IT RIGHT ON THE DIPSTICK!!!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

pryorguy- some punchlines just write themselves.