Wednesday, February 9, 2011

It's A Bird! It's A Plane! It's 2000 Pages!



Jonathan Gruber, the alleged MIT economics genius who developed the financial strategy behind Obamacare ("we'll bend the cost curve down by driving prices up") is concerned that people don't really understand how great it is because they aren't willing to read a boring and convoluted 2400 page bill. And that's just the politicians who voted for it.

Which is why Mr. Gruber has just signed a deal to turn the whole thing into a "graphic novel,"
which is the official term for any comic book which is longer than "Lord of the Rings" and requires an OSHA permit to lift without a kidney belt.

Presumably, the comic book (which carries the catchy title “Health Care Reform: What It Is, Why It’s Necessary, How it Works”) will be filled with exciting scenes in which Evil Doctor Pediatrician is ripping tonsils out of perfectly healthy children, and Greedy General Practioner is sawing the feet off diabetic patients rather than advising them to buy Michelle Obama's cookbook.

And we can't wait to see how Mr. Gruber will explain, in Wham! Pow! Crash! fashion, why hundreds of business and unions are demanding and receiving presidential waivers to get out of paying Obamacare's costs. And do those waivers make Alleged Presidentman a good guy or a bad guy in this comic book scenario? And will we finally find out if his birth certificate was destroyed when Krypton exploded?

We can't imagine that many people will actually want to buy this graphic novel... but we can rather easily imagine (as the publisher surely does), that the government will probably purchase these things by the truckload and pass them out on every doorstep like phonebooks.

Only larger.

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Blatant Plug: Hope n' Change wishes to thank Johnny Optimism for his guest appearance in today's comic. Johnny has his own comic which is updated on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday each week.

But if you don't want to go there and pay him a short visit, that's fine. He's been hurt before, and your unfeeling rejection won't kill him. Probably.
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16 comments:

robert said...

I'm confused, is the comic book for us, or people in congress?

Pete(Detroit) said...

What part of letting the fed control 1/7th of the total economy strikes anyone as a good idea? What part of giving up control of your life / health strikes anyone as a good idea?
Oh, wait, these are the 'it can't be MY fault, it must be someone ELSE'S responsibility' nanny state loving a$$-hats that expect someone else to take care / charge of them cradle to grave.
Maybe we can find a nice island, off the shore of N.Korea perhaps, and set them all up there? give 'em food 'n stuff, and just keep them the eff out of our way? And out of our LIVES?
Yeesh.
Parasites, and people who think they know better than I do how to spend my paycheck. P*ss me OFF!

John the Econ said...

I always assumed that Obamacare was the product of political strategists plotting to destroy what is left of the free market for health care along with politicians throwing special-interest goodies into a giant cauldron. I never realized that ObamaCare had an "economic genius" behind it. That its supposed author now wishes to express his vision in the form of a comic book now explains why.

Clearly, the academic standards at even MIT have fallen since I was in school...

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

It's fitting that this regime should want to use a comic book to explain Obamacare. I don't know if it will have the same drama and excitement as 300, but like that "graphic novel" all the good guys end up dead in the end. On a lighter note, Obamacare will now be taught as a credited subject in college...clown college.

Earl said...

I don't know whether to laugh or cry at the audacity of using a graphic novel to explain this stinking p.o.s. It's the details that make Obamacare so odious. Johnny's stool sample has to be more pleasant by comparison.

pryorguy said...

I'm thinking maybe a video game would work better, with a lotta hip-hop in the background!

There would be a choice of weapons to shoot down seniors, and bonus points ( waivers like the unions get ) !

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

BTW, Stilton, I was not aware of Johnny Optimism. It is now bookmarked.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Angry Hoosier Dad- Not aware of Johnny Optimism?! Maybe I need to make my postage-stamp sized ad for him a little bigger in that left hand column...

Bobo said...

How much is Mr. Goober...I mean Gruber, being paid by the taxpayers to doodle his way to financial independence?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Bobo- As far as I can tell, taxpayer money isn't involved in creating the book. The real payday will come when the government (or political groups) start buying the book to distribute in an effort to gin up votes in 2012.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

Stilton:
My fault. I never look at the left side of anything.

Colby Muenster said...

Ooooo. This little communist is dumb like a fox!

I maintain that today's generation do not read tradtional books like my generation did (I'm a semi-geezer). I think they are way more prone to read something that looks cool and is full of graphics like this "so called novel." And as an added bonus, maybe BO will have even younger audiences reading his socialist crap. Hitler knew that future success lie in the youth of Germany, and this nearly worked for him. BO also knows where his bread is buttered, so to speak. Wouldn't BO just LOVE to drop the voting age to about 15?

Anonymous said...

I hope they print this "graphic novel" on two ply. If it shows up on my doorstep I plan on using it for a more appropriate use......

JustaJeepGuy said...

If only everyone knew that a "novel" is FICTION, then the idea of Obamacare-as-graphic-novel would be worth the waste of time of its "author". If only they wouldn't waste tax dollars with their ideas...

Pete(Detroit) said...

Hell, Jeep - I'd be glad if they realized that the entire Interwebs is fiction - in fact, that's the name of the subatomic particles that make up the IP info packets - fict-ons....

boots said...

All the phone books that are delivered to my house go straight into the trash can....