Admittedly, Hope n' Change Cartoons is just indulging in a little playful Friday fantasy here after a long and wearying week of Barack Obama claiming that everything that's gone wrong in the past 3 and a half years is Bush's fault.
Which made us wonder, "what else might Barry be expected to take responsibility for that was actually Bush's doing?"
But of course, there's no evidence whatsoever that Obama isn't the real father of the girls in the Whitehouse. After all, only a real father would put the needs of his daughters ahead of his political ambitions and not try to raise money with them. No, wait - Barry's doing that. Bad example.
And certainly Hope n' Change puts no credence in any of the Chicago-based rumors that Barry's repeated visits to Gay bath house "Man's Country" indicate anything other than a politician's desire to connect with his base. So to speak. And Larry Sinclair? Never heard of him.
Nor do we read anything into Michelle Obama's recent "too much information" admission on television that she and Barry are out of the baby business. Which would not only explain their perceived lack of intimacy, but also why Obama spends so much "boy time" on the golf course, and Michelle spends so much... umm...quality time with her rototiller.
But far be it from Hope n' Change to suggest that Barack Obama's fatherhood is as much of a secret-filled lying fiction as the rest of his mysterious past. It's as simple as listening to the obvious pride in his voice when he speaks to crowds, dabs an invisible tear from his eye, and expresses the deep and abiding love he has for...his two sons.
Oops! Hey, anyone could make a little mistake like that, right? Granted, the world's greatest orator has recently made that mistake five times, but it probably doesn't mean anything.
Probably...
In any event, Hope n' Change wants to wish all of its readers and friends a very happy and meaningful Father's Day this Sunday. Take time to thank your old man or, if he's no longer in this world, remember some cherished memories and say thanks for those.
And while you're at it, be glad that your memories aren't of a father who was an alcoholic, child-molesting, child-abandoning, wife-beating communist and serial bigamist who lost both legs (and eventually his life) in drunk-driving accidents. Because with that kind of a father figure, you'd grow up to be an absolutely terrible parent yourself.
Which reminds us: Happy Father's Day, Barack Hussein Obama...
Junior.
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17 comments:
I'm reminded of an old riddle, updated: What do you get when you cross a pig with Moochelle? NOTHING. some things a pig just won't do...
There's no way that Dubya would stoop so low!
Well, Stilton, my dad had the alcoholic, wife-beating, child-abandoning part down to a T, but my failings as a parent or a person are not his fault. I truly believe that once you leave your parents' house, your life is yours to salvage or screw up as you see fit. Sometimes I still wonder why our father walked out on us, then I remember what I and my six brothers were like as kids and say, "why did he stick around that long?".
Seriously, I have no doubt that Barry is the father to those girls. Now the question about the mechanics of sperm meeting egg...that may be a whole other story.
AHD - Like a 3-point jumper, from 20 ft? "He shoots, HE SCORES!"
Or maybe like that old McD commercial - "Off the mirror, around the bedpost, nothing but ...." (yeah, it is a family comic, mostly, after all)
Given what a decent, classy lady Laura Bush seems to be, any time spent w/ the Mooch would surely be 'a walk on the wild side'...
Stilton! You owe me a new keyboard, now. The first spew of coffee was the "roto-tiller, "then came the photoshop at the end! Well done!
And this made me think of the ego differences between President Bush and self proclaimed Grand Poobah of The 99%. I have no doubt George and even Laura would laugh at today's post, but it would only make President Urkel and Chewbacca angry.
Happy Fathers' Day to all the fathers on the list. To all those muthas in Washington? Pheh...
Speaking of blaming Bush, I recently heard some obama drone trot out what apparently will be their new mantra going forward: "It took eight years to break it. It'll take eight years to fix it."
And speaking of obama's hypothetical sons, he's already claimed one (sort of) in Trayvon Martin, a pot-smoking petty criminal. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree.
@Emmentaler Limburger: +1
@Anonymous- Plus, pigs aren't Halal, so it might be Forbidden in the most holy of holy texts.
@JustaJeepGuy- Yeah, I just wanted to have a little fun with the "Blame Bush" meme, but it pained me to even suggest that George W might consort with these lowlifes.
@Angry Hoosier Dad- I realize that having a horrible father is not an inescapable sentence of being one yourself (and my sincere apologies if it seemed otherwise). Moreover, Barry wouldn't have been shaped by his father's failings because he never really knew the man (although he could - and does - have anger and detachment issues which I think can be tied to his father's race and abandonment).
Regarding the matter of conception between the Obamas, I don't want to speculate. All I'm saying is I'd never eat a meal with them if the preparation involved use of their turkey baster.
@Stan da Man- As angry as she frequently is, a "special moment" with Michelle would more likely be a walk on her riled side.
@Colby- I would hope George would see the humor in today's post. Obviously I'm not making any actual accusations today - it's Friday, and I wanted to have some fun AND vent. All week, Barry has been on a renewed "Blame Bush" kick, as well as delivering pure fictions like his oft-repeated story that he just ambled into a restaurant and got stuck with the bill for the steak dinner the nasty Republicans ate. Or that he's the slowest spending sonofagun since Eisenhower. Or that the price of college will go up unless taxes on the rich are raised (say what?!).
Basically, there are only two notes in Obama's campaign symphony: "Blame Bush" and "Lie Like a Rug" and I'm freaking sick of it. So today's cartoon is just my metaphorical way of kicking him in the nuts.
@Emmentaler- By the way, is it racist to have a Father's Day but not a "Baby Daddy Day?"
@CenTexTim- That mantra doesn't quite work since after the first four years, many things are getting worse. So if it took 12 years to break it, will it take another 12 to fix?
And regarding hypothetical sons, Obama has a lot of them based on his low threshold that anyone can qualify if they "look like him." Seems to me that Trayvon Obama recently got a new brother who gets high on bath salts and eats peoples' faces.
Stil- as to the post, all I can say is GWB has too much class for that and Michelle doesn't have enough good sense to find a decent man to father her childern.
As to the "Blame it all on Bush" meme, those of us who think with our brains know better and there's no hope for the rest. All the Zombie-Americans will go Obama.
On a slightly different subject, I was speaking to an 8th grader recently and was horrified to find that she had never been taught what captitalism, democracy, or communisum were or their effects on the people thusly governed. No wonder we have so many Obama zombies in our population. Education, from Kindergarden to post-grad, has failed this country miserably, turning out drones that cannot think for themselves and do nothing but parrot the liberal BS. of their teachers
They are most surly his children until they get pregnant or commit a crime, at which point they then become the fault of Bush. I believe that Islamofascists refer to this as the 'rhythm method', which is actually the 'eyeball-bucket method' in western cultures. This consists of performing the act of procreation whilst standing upon two overturned buckets. When the woman sees her man's eyes cross, she kicks his bucket. Not exactly sure-fire, though this may explain some of the more reprehensible behaviors we see coming out of this administration and the middle east.
Mike Porter - as I understand it, the 'rythm method' involves plotting the woman's cycle and avoiding her fertile times. Done properly and carefully, it's about 60% effective. Which is why you call people who practice it, "Parents" (the 'pull out' method, due to "pre-climatic seepage" is useless. and neither (obviously) protects against STDs...)
In Re 'Bush's fault' - someone needs to remind this turd herder that at this point in his 1st term, W had suffered not only the dot.com bust (Thanks, Bill!) AND the crippling hit of 9/11, but his economic policies (primarily the hated tax cuts) revenue was UP 20% over 2000...
so yeah, let's talk about the 'failed policies' of the past, let's start w/ Aunt Nancy taking power in '07 and starting the out of controll spending spree. It didn't take "8 years" - only *2*
Farg tarded ass jacket!
>GRRRR!<
@Stilton: Yes. But, since they don't really want to be identified as the fathers, I expect no push-back from the likes of the NAACP, Black Pussycats, etc...
Funny you should mention the Republican steak dinner bit. From The Patriot Post this morning: On another campaign stop for barbecue, the president and his four guests left without paying the $55.58 bill. The White House did settle the tab before the end of the day, but the episode reminded us of a particular attack Obama made on Republicans. Rebutting their criticism of his deficit spending, he said it's "like somebody goes to the restaurant, orders a big steak dinner, martini, all that stuff and then just as you're sitting down, they leave and accuse you of running up the tab." Just as with his budgets, he ordered something he didn't pay for. Kind of like what all of the Øbama Administration agencies have been up to - that order a big dinner and stick the public with the bill bit...
Per the source of his sons, er, I mean, daughters: let me just muddy the waters a bit further by quoting a masterfully redacted portion of a PDF of one of The Øne's teleprompter scripts. "Let me be perfectly clear. I may be a gender-confused, narcissistic wannabe despot - a tyrant, by all practical definitions - but I have never - not once in my life - engaged in beastiality. So there it is. Moochelle cannot possibly be the mother.
@graylady- As I said before, I'm not slamming George W in the least in this cartoon. I didn't agree with all of his policies, but I thought (and think) that he's a classy guy - and someday I hope I get the opportunity to tell him so.
Regarding your story about the 8th grader who was never instructed about capitalism, democracy, or communism, I don't know whether to scream or cry. This poor child is socially, ideologically illiterate - by design. And seriously, what sort of political philosophy promotes ignorance as a way of sustaining their agenda?!
@Mike Porter- It's also likely that the girls are really Barack Obama's because why else would he refer to their births as a punishment?
@Pete(Detroit)- WHAT?! I thought the "Rhythm Method" meant you do it while playing a Barry White album? Well this explains a lot...
Regarding all that Obama "inherited" from Bush - you make excellent points about the hard circumstancs Bush was up against. But let's not underestimate the additional economic damage caused by Democrat control of the House and Senate during a significant amount of his term.
@Emmentaler- Great timing for Obama to stiff a restaurant after his make-believe metaphor went viral.
And I'm relieved to see that Barry never engaged in beastiality. I never believed that the rumors of what he did with monkeys and chickens were true.
Stilton,
It's a good thing your intention is merely to metaphorically kick him in the nuts because I doubt your foot has good enough aim to accomplish the real thing. Remember, one is the size of a mustard seed, and the other is just a little bitty thing.
Pete(Detroit),
9/11? The farg tarded ass jacket views 9/11 as a double whammy good thing. not only did we get what we richly deserved from the poor, downtrodden Muslims, it had the added bonus of putting hundreds of evil corporations out of business.
I heard some "educated beyond their intelligence" libtard on the radio the other day saying Obama was not to blame for anything because congress is always working against him. WTF!? Excuse me, Mr. libtard, The Blamer in Chief had TWO FULL YEARS of a majority in the House and a supermajority in the Senate. They could (and DID) pass any freaking crap legislation they wanted. Have these two years been magically erased somehow? This is another point that Romney needs to hammer on, DAILY and often.
Stilton,
Barry White is fine; just don't put on "Flight of the Bumblebee."... unless your health insurance covers chiropractors.
Day-um, Colby, these LOLs in the office are like ta gets me fahrd!
I kinda got accustomed to the "blame Bush" dailogue quite a while back...what really strikes me as incredulous is the outright FABRICATIONS that O is thowing out there in a desperate attempt to con some unsuspecting voter!
And, how about the news today...allowing young illegals to stay in this country 'temporarily'...yeh we know how temporarily...just till after the election so they can vote for him! How stinkin low can a person go... totally UNPRESIDENTIAL! Loved the reporter who interrupted him at his announcement of this momentous thing! Seems he is as fed up as the rest of us!
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