Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Distaffing Up

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, busty ross

Much like other award-winning, widely respected national news organizations, Hope n' Change is gearing up for the election season (and quite possibly the downfall of civilization as we know it) by adding qualified staffers to our elite team of commentators.

To that end, please meet the newest addition to our team. She's conservative, she's patriotic, she's...

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It is critically important to point out, especially to Mrs. Jarlsberg, that Busty wasn't hired just for her looks. Assuming that she is good-looking, which we have no idea about because we're old and married and don't notice such things.

Rather, Miss Ross was hired because of her impressive journalistic background, her insight into women's issues, the fact that she drinks whiskey out of a coffee cup, and her willingness (at no additional cost) to provide armed security for the Hope n' Change office tower. Honestly, she hides guns in the darnedest places!

Busty will also become a spirited debating partner for our liberal correspondent, Lefty Lucy, who has enthusiastically accepted the new arrival as her new Best Friend Forever...

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This is going to be fun.

34 comments:

Joseph ET said...

@Stilton, If Rush Limbaugh can have his gold microphone, you certainly deserve a gold keyboard or mouse. I’m looking forward to the debates between Busty Ross and Lefty Lucy. Mrs. ET agrees that you are the best.

REM1875 said...

Welcome a broad ahh aboard, miss rusty, ahhh trusty, ummm Busty. What was my point? Oh yeah old, married. No effect on me whatsoever.

Rod said...

Oh yeah; now this is really gittin' good. And Mrs. Jarlsberg is a saint.

TrickyRicky said...

I am also old and married. But I am also not yet dead. Mrs. Tricky has no problem when a particularly attractive young woman passes within my limited range of vision. She will even elbow me in the ribs and say "check that out!" just to be sure I don't miss anything.

I'm not sure if you can arrange it with clip art Stilton, but one of the first things that crossed my mind is I see a cat fight in the future.

Geoff King said...

It's good to finally be able to put a forehead to the writer of my favorite blog.

Earl Allison said...

Very nice new character, and while it would be NICE to see Busty and Lefty debate, one cannot debate a person who is incapable of reason, as Lefty is :)

Bearcat said...

I can't wait! Stilt, you just keep bringing it...! As Tricky said-- this cat fight is going to be EPIC. But what will you do with the shredded pieces of Lucy afterward...?
Keep up the good work!!

Anonymous said...

I just want you to know that I enjoy reading your political commentaries. Your work is appreciated.

With my lower intelligence as I get older, the brevity, and getting to the point quickly are appreciated.

CenTexTim said...

Is it just me, or does Busty Ross bear a striking resemblance to Daisy Mae?

ANd if you remember Daisy Mae, you're old...

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Joseph ET- A golden mouse, huh? Now you're putting ideas in my head...

@REM1875- You can still find her mind and politics attractive.

@Rod- Mrs. Jarlsberg is definitely a saint.

@TrickyRicky- I'm not sure if there will be an actual cat fight anytime soon - though I also don't know that it won't happen considering that these are both strong, opinionated women.

The plan is to keep a little distance between the ladies, with each one opining in her own strip - albeit sometimes pairing their strips to get two perspectives on a single issue.

On the other hand, if they prefer to work things out by mud wrestling, I won't stand in their way.

@Geoff King- In my previous pictures, I have nice dark hair. But I've been aging in dog years ever since B. Hussein took office, and my hair has turned white - much the way it happens to characters in horror movies who've seen something terrifying.

@Earl Allison- Actually, it seems like Lefties who are incapable of reason love debating, even though they suck at it. Every time they say "that's racist!" (or sexist, or capitalist) they think they've won.

@Bearcat- Lucy's politics may be weak, but don't write her off in a fight. She's got some spitfire in her.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Anonymous- I don't think getting older lowers our intelligence, it just reduces our willingness to put up with a lot of BS to get to the point.

One of my main goals with HnC is to simplify and clarify issues while entertaining. Glad you like the mix!

@CenTexTim- There are a couple of similarities now that you mention it.

And I'm so old, I remember when Daisy Mae was still Daisy Definitely Won't.

Anonymous said...

Can't help but noticing that both Busty and Lucy are redheads...

Being married to a redhead for 25+ years, all I can say is that will be one hell of a cat fight...

Where does one by advance tickets? :)

Bruce Bleu said...

Wow, do you think Busty could make a flag for me? I know if Lefty Loosey knew how to sew, her flag would have a hammer and sickle on it.
I love Busty's eyes, and having been a "car guy" since my youth, I'll wager that Busty's headlights are quite impressive.
Certainly looks like REM1875 got a bit "tongue-tied" (no entendre intended).
Regarding a "cat-fight"?... I am convinced I know who would spend more time in the litter box and who would be at the scratching post!

John the Econ said...

I'm thinking "pillow fight".

At least I don't have to feel intellectually guilty for loving Busty.

Meanwhile, speaking of current events, the Wall Street Journal had an op-ed from Bret Stephens yesterday that ran down in detail the successes of Obama in the middle east over the last month-and-a-half alone:

Everything Is Awesome, Mideast Edition
It takes a special innocence to imagine that the chaos unfolding in the Middle East can be put right
.

"Ben Rhodes, President Obama’s deputy national security adviser, has been offering a reassuring view of the Iranian nuclear deal in the face of some Arab skepticism. “If you can diplomatically and peacefully resolve the nuclear issue in a way that prevents Iran from obtaining a nuclear weapon,” he told reporters last week, “we believe that will lead to a much more stable region.” Mr. Rhodes also contends that with a deal “there will be no need to see [a] regional arms race.”

So what’s more frightening: That Mr. Rhodes believes what he’s saying? Or that he does not?"

TheOldMan said...

"...these are both strong, opinionated women." Betsy, definitely strong, healthy, and a bunch of other adjectives. Lucy would probably retreat to her safe place and watch puppy videos.

Colby Muenster said...

Wait a minute.... I recognize that forehead. You were that creepy guy on Home Improvement that was always lurking around the fence spying on the Taylors!

Seriously, nice post, and I'm looking forward to the Busty Lucy debates.

rickn8or said...

Thank you for including Lucy and her dissenting viewpoints, if only to counter the notion that all leftist women are ugly, hate-filled harridans.

Oh, and I approve of Busty Ross too. Women with guns are hawt.

Chris said...

Guess you'll have to just run it up the ol' flagpole (*ahem!*) and see if anyone salutes! Ten-HUT!

-------

RE: Hee Haw -- Sah-LOOT!

-------

Wave the flag proudly!

Proof said...

A hearty "Busty, yea!" to your choice of a new character.

Uncle Dirt said...

You have hit it out of the park again, Stilton! And you took the words "mud wrestling" out of my mouth. I can't wait for the political discourse between these two.

PRY said...

Lucy's cute...Busty's HOT...a little eye-candy never hurts!

Reminds me that 20 years ago or so, Britney Spears' biggest fan age-group was guys about our age! I think as we get older, guys, 'it don't hurt to look' takes on a whole new meaning!

DougM said...

Sorry, Stilton.
I know you're trying to cultivate an enlightened political discourse, here;
but all I can think of is these two in a kiddie pool filled with mud or jello.

PRY said...

Oh yeah...meant to throw this interesting (but not surprising) tidbit into the pot...according to AmericanThinker.com...regarding Ferguson, Missouri...

Hired protesters with the Black Lives Matter movement have started a #CutTheCheck hashtag and held a sit-in at the offices for the successor group to the Association of Community Organizations for Reform Now (ACORN) in Missouri after the group allegedly stopped paying them.

$5K a month! But, since there's no pay, no more riots?!

DougM said...

Oh,
and I googled pics of "Busty Ross."
Not the same lady.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Anonymous- It does seem like a volatile mix, doesn't it?

@Bruce Bleu- I'm sure that among Busty's other talents, she could sew you a flag. She is, after all, a descendant of Betsy Ross.

@John the Econ- A pillow fight could be fun, but as I'm allergic to feathers I'm afraid I can't allow such shenanigans in the office. Then again, I suppose I could wear a dust mask...

Per the WSJ article, Bret Stephens is always great - and he nails it again here. The statements by Ben Rhodes are sheer fantasy - and do fill me with sheer terror.

@TheOldMan- I don't really think Lucy is the retreating sort. Especially if someone is really pushing her hot buttons.

(Alright, those of you who are snickering about "hot buttons" can stop now.)

@Colby Muenster- What I'm really worried about are the "forehead recognition" algorithms being used by the NSA.

@rickn8or- There are actually plenty of cute liberals (well, until they open their mouths). But none of the attractive ones seem to rise high in the ranks of media or politics (unlike among conservatives).

@Chris- I can see that we're going to be heading into some serious double entendre territory around here...

@Proof- She'll be glad to hear that.

@Uncle Dirt- I'm looking forward to their political exchanges too. Like it or not, "women's issues" are front and center again and I really wanted spokespersons from both camps to address them.

@PRY- Hey, if I can't make the news any better, I can at least try to make it easier to look at.

@DougM- We may have to put the mud/jello question to a vote...

@PRY- Yeah, the "pay for play" protesters aren't any shock at all. Remember when Nancy Pelosi claimed that the Tea Party wasn't a real grass roots movement, but only bought and paid for "astroturf?" Since then, I've heard of multiple occasions of paid protesters on the Left - but never the Right.

@DougM- There is actually a Busty Ross who is a stripper, and there are several other ladies with the same name out there.

But given time, our little lady will claim her rightful Google dominance. (Oh great, now I've got you thinking about mud, jello, and "dominance.") (grin)

Geoff King said...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=Wgx4ZYMD4tQ
Sorry about that.

John the Econ said...

So ISIS took Ramadi, and is one big step closer to complete control of Iraq. But what did Obama spend his day warning us about? Climate Change as the "indisputable" security threat. That's right folks. The guy who flies a personal 747 to play golf says that denying climate change erodes national security, and it would be "dereliction of duty" not to surrender our freedom, economy, and sovereignty to the warm-mongers. I guess it's only a matter of time now before he deploys the Army to seize my SUV.

I'll take my personal response to "climate change" at least as seriously as Obama, Clinton, Gore, and Leo do. I figure that as long as my carbon footprint is less than half of theirs, I'm morally superior. Isn't that how it works now?

FlyBoy said...

Reagarding Busty Ross: As my Dad used to say: "Just because you're on a diet doesn't mean you can't look at the menu!"

Rod said...

@John the Econ: About that looniness with Pwez Fudd and global warming being THE big national security crisis: No matter what game he playing, OR he's nutty as a fruitcake... it's clear he doesn't think any of the other things going to Hell on his watch are any big deal.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Geoff King- I've got to admit that I admire the talent, gusto, and patriotism of the young woman in your video.

@John the Econ- I about soiled myself when I heard Obama doing the Coast Guard commencement address and saying that global warming is our biggest national security challenge, and is the reason that Boko Harum is kidnapping, raping, and selling children into sexual slavery.

And he delivered this message with far more passion (albeit still not believable) than anything he's said about Al Qaeda, Isis, or any other genuine threat to our nation.

The man simply hates America and Americans. And this latest "global warming causes terror" BS is a way to pin the world's woes on Americans who use fossil fuels.

What a despicable piece of lying excrement he is.

@FlyBoy- Your Dad was clearly a wise man.

@Rod- He doesn't think those other things are a "big deal" because they advance his agenda to end our nation's status as a superpower. I'm not being metaphorical or exercising hyperbole when I say he freaking hates this nation and everyone in it. But to give the devil his due, he is taking us down - and faster than I would have ever believed possible.

Skoonj said...

Excellent use of the term Vagino-American!

Bruce Bleu said...

Geoff King,
The lady in your video reminds me of a certain entertainment genre... "BurlIvesesque".

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

What a great addition Busty Ross is. I'm getting so tired of looking that worn out hag Hillary. You know that woman has never taken a good picture.

Stan da Man said...

In the Jello / Mud debate, I'm firmly in flavor of Jello - the leftovers could be auctioned off, for charity...
And the various fans would get their just desserts...