This will, in fact, quite likely be our final televised presidential debate too, as we can't currently imagine the process of selecting candidates or voting in presidential races to have any real meaning in the future.
Still, we'll be watching tonight because we've always enjoyed theater (particularly of the Grand Guignol variety) and we think there's a real opportunity for fireworks tonight. And not just metaphorical fireworks; Trump may actually light a cherry bomb hoping to trigger a seizure in Hillary.
Or maybe he'll just start listing all of Hillary's new scandals that have come out since the last debate: having the State Department pressure the FBI to help conceal her crimes, using her high office to grant political favors to the "Friends of Bill" who donated to the Clinton Foundation, sensitive documents from Hillary's private server turning up on the "dark web," and the explosive undercover footage from James O'Keefe and Project Veritas which proves that the DNC and Hillary Campaign really are "rigging the election" as Trump has alleged.
And there's more, of course. With the Clintons, there's always more - and there always will be. They are the Earth's most perfect source of unending, renewable corruption.
We'd say more, but we want to save a little strength for tonight's ordeal. And by "a little strength," we mean what's left in our bottle of Scotch.