Friday, February 12, 2010

Fat of the Land


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To fight an epidemic of childhood obesity, Barack Obama has just created a federally-funded obesity taskforce and has given first lady Michelle Obama the job of spearheading publicity efforts. To kick things off, she declared that obesity is "a threat to national security," though she presumably feels that Ronald McDonald should be tried in a civilian court rather than being shipped to Guantanamo Bay.

Michelle will help kids by encouraging them to exercise (
"Touch your toes like you're bowing to Japanese royalty!"), eat more fruits and vegetables ("A day without arugula is like a day without sunshine!"), and presumably by giving them fashion tips...

BONUS: From the Hope n' Change Gift Shoppe, a tribute to the first lady and the Beatles!



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10 comments:

Pete(Detroit) said...

As noted elsewhere, can't we just laugh at them? Sure, it's cruel, and damaging to their little psyches, but maybe they'll be motivated to eat better, live better and earn some genuine esteem. Obesity will be outlawed in adults as soon as O-care passes, so that won't be an issue..

Pete(Detroit) said...

Forgot to mention - laughter is free, and does not need a new federal office to follow it...
Oh, wait, THERE'S the problem..

Suzy said...

I haven't seen anyone categorize the obesity but I'd venture to guess there is a VERY high percentage in inner cities for two reasons....one, its hard to get out of the house and exercise in a rowhome neighborhood...and two, people on food stamps have a high percentage of being overweight. I don't mean it to be offensive...but its funny that the O Admins hates "rich" people but its the "rich people" who can afford to work out at the gym and shop at Trader Joes...and so now they want everyone doing it. haha.

Its not candy bars in school or Ronald McDonald...its mostly video games and tv really, and computers. A cheeseburger never phased those working on farms and ranches in the "old days".

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Pete- Your "scarlet letter" approach is certainly cost-efficient, though we'd prefer an iniative to have people laugh at liberals before they turned their attentions to the overweight.

Suzy- You're right that there's a huge (and seemingly oxymoronic) correlation between being poor and being obese in this country. The sad fact is that a lot of bad, high-fat high-calorie food is extremely cheap...and so families with food stamps eat poorly but plentifully.

But the resulting problems and expenses associated with obesity (diabetes and heart disease) take a huge financial and human toll.

In general, Hope n' Change supports an iniative to try to reduce the epidemic of obesity in this country (although we're not weighing in on Obama's plan until we hear a lot more details).

Pete(Detroit) said...

Unfortunatly, typicaly, there is NOTHING funny about Liberals. Sad, pathetic, SCARY, yes. "Funny" not so much. See also Al Franken, Jennifer Granholm (our Gov)

But, yes, point taken
Also, laughing AT them (as opposed to with them) does tend to make the heads explode...

Suzy said...

The things that would reduce obesity are things the liberals would never agree to. Some ideas being:

Limiting of food stamps to fresh fruits, meats, rice, potatoes, and veggies and wholegrain breads and cereals. Any "Junk" food like cookies, crackers, soda, or candy must be purchased with cash.

More recess at schools instead of being afraid that someone is going to stub his toe on the playground and sue.

Speaking of suing...caps on frivolous lawsuits and making it more difficult to sue when someone is not really at fault (i.e. kid falling off the monkey bars).

Less babysitting by schools and government and forcing more responsibility for nutrition and health care on parents. They don't do it because they aren't made to do it.

Health care revamp by capping lawsuits and making more care available to families by low cash payments instead of government subsidies....and many other ideas too numerous to mention.

Finally...somehow closing loopholes so that people on welfare REALLY REALLY need it...not people collecting six different checks from the government and sitting on their butts getting fat while there are truly the middle working class who really need temporary help...not a way of life.

I could go on for an hour...really to stop obesity you have to go back in history and find out when obesity began..in a large scale manner that is...and start reversing the cause.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Suzy- I think we need to send you to Washington ASAP to explain this stuff to our elected officials!

I was astounded not long ago to be looking at pictures of the civil rights protests of the 60's (which I'm old enough to remember), and realizing that there were almost no fat people.

So we don't have to look too far back in history to see where the problems began...which is, as you point out, also where we can start looking for solutions.

Colby Muenster said...

Yikes. Get ready for the Fat and Trade bill. I wonder how much a calorie will cost?

Anonymous said...

Those thin civil rights protesters were likely smoking a couple packs of cigarettes a day ...

Philip said...

Dem Sen. Rockefeller On Obama: "He's Beginning To Be Not Believable To Me"