Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Yes We Suck

Only one day after her husband released a federal budget which more or less keeps everyone attached to the government teat, Michelle Obama has kicked off a new initiative to encourage breast feeding as a way to combat childhood obesity.

Studies show that children who are breast fed longer have less tendency to become obese, perhaps because boobs are so rarely accompanied by a large order of fries. But fewer and fewer women are nursing their children, and the problem is particularly pronounced in the black community, where up to 40% of infants receive no breast feeding at all.

To counteract this, the first lady is taking her
"Yes We Suck" campaign to the streets...and she's getting plenty of assistance from her alleged husband. Mr. Obama has pushed through legislation to make breast pumps tax deductible (after taking many other common medical items off the list of things which can be purchased using people's Health Savings Account funds), made funding available to counsel mothers on the complicated process of nursing ("Step one - attach the baby"), insisted that companies fund a special area in each workplace (not a bathroom) where mothers can express milk, and is looking into the possibility of naming all three Kardashian sisters as Breastfeeding Czars.

Hope n' Change is perfectly supportive of the well-documented health benefits associated with breast feeding...but we're far less supportive of the government using our tax dollars to stick their noses where they don't belong (if you know what we mean).

Frankly, that turns
all taxpayers into boobs. And at this point, we're pretty much drained dry.

"Got Milk?"


it's simple said...

Government teat suckers=lifetime democrap voters.

Earl said...

Breastfeeding is also supposed to help women lose fat in those stubborn areas of the thighs and rear. Not that I'm suggesting anyone has a problem here.

Angry Hoosier Dad said...

I understand that La Leche League offered to help with Jug-ear's campaign in return for Michelle's support for breast feeding. They even offered to have "WTF" inked on their chests. You know...tit for tat.

Suzy said...

LOL @ Earl!!!!!

I've known kids who were breastfed that were also obese....mostly because of genetics. When they get older, if they get active and the parents watch what they eat, it can be controlled.

I wish Michelle would just, I dunno, go to a library for a change or something, and read a book to a kid. And wear a sweater.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Angry Hoosier Dad- Funny!

Anonymous said...

We all want Obama out of the White House, and there is no Republican nominee who can beat Obama. Except Paul. The only way to beat Obama is to steal his votes, and the only who who will do that is Paul. Obama only won the election because he got the Independent vote- it was anyone other than McCain/Palin. Independents and Democrats alike love Paul.
This is a serious situation. We can't just wait until 2016 when any old Republican is a shoe in. I fear the economy- and the dollar- will not last that long. It's time we stop worrying about the reputation of the Republican party (who will be their puppet) and start worrying about the future of this country.
Please, don't give up on Ron Paul. Reconsider what you think you know about him- the media has not done a fair job. He was completely ignored in the 08 election.

"Ron Paul is one of the outstanding leaders fighting for a stronger national defense. As a former Air Force officer, he knows well the needs of our armed forces, and he always puts them first. We need to keep him fighting for our country."
-Ronald Reagan

Colby Muenster said...

Stilton, You're a genius! you prove it every day; keep up the great work.

Something just hit me after reading today's installment of "I have to laugh to keep from crying."

I can almost smell a "fat people tax" coming, can you? Our deficit worries would be over, and Michelle can get on her soapbox and scream, "I TRIED TO WARN YOU, but now all you fat asses are gonna PAY!"

Moron said...

Angry Hoosier Dad,

What's a "tat"?


Boone the Moron

Earl said...

Tatoo. (He mentioned them having "WTF" inked on their chests.) I agree with Stilton. FUNNY!

Anonymous said...

Wouldn't that be "tat for tit"?

Earl said...


Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Readers- Thank you for keeping me abreast of the semantics involved!

pryorguy said...

Why dont these people mind their OWN DAMN BUSINESS for a change? Theyre gettin like the nosy , busybody relative who thinks they know everything! Well, I didnt vote for him and I damn sure didnt vote for his old lady!

Do I sound fed up?

pryorguy said...

Obama and his wife are a good case for a well-fitting bra....just a coupla loose boobs who keep going all over the place! (just keeping with the theme today!)

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

pryorguy- That's a very uplifting sentiment.