Wednesday, May 1, 2013

What a Load

obama, obama jokes, terror, tsarnaev, boston, welfare, lawyer, stilton jarlsberg, hope n' change, hope and change, political humor, political jokes

Okay, okay - Hope n' Change isn't getting any awards for subtlety today. But when we read that taxpayers gifted the Tsarnaev family with $100,000 in free benefits and, in return, got a monstrous act of terrorism - we were appalled.

And now, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev's team of taxpayer-funded defense lawyers has added attorney Judy Clarke, who previously helped the Unabomber, the Olympic bomber,  and Tucson mass-shooter Jared Loughner all escape the death penalty.

All of which makes Hope n' Change feel that ordinary, non-terrorist, non-government beneficiary type citizens aren't really getting the very best value for our tax dollars.

We were going to say "bang for the buck" - but sadly, that's exactly what we got by funding the thieving, drug-using Tsarnaev family instead of shipping their jihad-loving asses out of the country when we had the chance.

And say, what about the unsurprising news that Barack Obama has (according to nonpartisan and carefully weighted studies) spent twice as much time vacationing and golfing as he has working on the economy?

Surely that little tidbit is worth the filling of an adult diaper or two - or would be if anyone outside of the conservative blogosphere even heard about it.

We'd say more, but all of this talk about things that are highly absorbent has reminded us of one more which needs immediate attention. Our liver.


TrickyRicky said...

I am sure to be preaching to the choir here. This empty suit community agitator has no interest in fixing the economy whatsoever. He never has. Witness the past five years. He wants to fundamentally transform the United States and has progressed depressingly far down that road. As for the most impeachable, treasonous actions of his administration such as Fast and Furious, Benghazi, ad nauseum....who cares? Not the lame stream media or the festering public. What does it really matter now to paraphrase Shillary. All we can hope for is that the progs don't take the house in 2014. That would truly usher in the endgame.

John Greco said...

John Q. Public….Are you a Muslim? And, did you try to blow up a major city in the US? But, failed? And, now you are in the hospital with all those medical bills…Don’t worry! Barry Obama is here to help you. Yes, that lovable president of that great country (that you tried to destroy) is going to assist you with your needs. How? Why by giving you FREE money!!!
Yes, you heard me right…By dialing this number -- 1(800)-BLOW-THINGS- UP – Barry can help you. Bills?…Gone! Student Loans?…Gone! Traveling Expenses to a country that does not like the U.S.?... Gone! Yes, you, too, can live the American Dream. So, act now! And, as an added bonus, if you come out of the closet, you get your darling, little face on the cover of Time Magazine, and press coverage from CNN, ABC, CBS, NBC, MSNBC, etc.
So, Act Now! 1(800)-BLOW-THINGS- UP.
(Paid by the ACLU, the Democratic Party, the Brotherhood of Muslims, etc.)

John the Econ said...

Only $100K? Your average pregnant immigrant crossing the desert from Mexico is costing us far more than that.

But what I don't understand is about how we are granting "asylum" to people supposedly because it's just too dangerous for them to remain in their native lands, and then after settling here they turn right around and start taking extended vacations back at those same supposedly "dangerous" homelands, and while they're living on welfare, no less! WTF?!?!?!

I haven't had an "extended" vacation since before the Neo-Keynesian meltdown. Can I apply for asylum in the south of France, live off their welfare system, and then return home when I get tired of it? Not even the weenie European socialists are so freekin whack!

And yet we law abiding, hard working Americans get to pay for this insanity, and then pay again for the collateral damage. And then the President tells us that the Federal budget simply cannot be cut, and that we're not paying enough.

Here's a simple law that should be introduced in Congress immediately: Anyone granted asylum in the US because their life is just too endangered in their homeland who then leaves the US to return home for vacation gets a decidedly one-way trip. When they say "goodbye", it should really mean goodbye.

txGreg said...

If anyone else is having trouble with the link in Stilt's commentary, try this one instead. (If it's just me, then never mind...)

The article is brief, and well worth your time. Unless you work for MSNBC, in which case "move along, nothing to see here!"

CenTexTim said...

Speaking of our (collective) liver, why is it that whenever I read the latest HnC I suddenly have an overwhelming desire for 'coffee'?

To paraphrase W.C. Fields, obama drives me to drink. That's the one thing I'm grateful to him for.

Well, that and the fact that obamacare will pay for my liver transplant...

John the Econ said...

Thanks @txGreg, the link was not working for anyone else either.

And please cut Obama some slack. It takes far more time to master golf than it does to "fundamentally transform" America to a 2nd-world socialist banana republic. As for economics, he learned all he needed to know as a "community organizer" and a patron of his Chicago pals. The lesson was simple: Get power, and then people will make you rich for no obvious reason. (Like Michelle's bogus $300k/yr job) And it really doesn't take all that much time to command minions to seize wealth from creators and redistribute to cronies and voters. Quite frankly, I'm surprised that he spent anywhere near 400 hours in "economic meetings". I assure you, unless you're an econ geek, they're boring as hell.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@TrickyRicky- You're entirely right that the amount of time Barry spends working on the economy isn't the problem- rather, it's that the economy is doing exactly what he wants as more people give up hope an go on the dole.

@John Greco- Well done! I would love to see this turned into an actual video spot. If I had some spare time, I'd be tempted to do it myself...

@John the Econ- What you say (especially your final conclusion) seems obvious on the face of it - so why don't the politicians get it?!

And I wince at your comment "only $100k" because such an amount really is seen as shrug-worthy in our entitlement wonderland. Like John Greco said, there's free, FREE, FREE money for the taking for everyone!

Meanwhile, what actually gets cut when spending is reduced infinitesimally? Whitehouse tours, Air Traffic control, Meals on Wheels for housebound seniors, and other deliberate attacks on the American people.

And getting back to the topic of people who blow up Americans, yesterday Barry said that they were "self-radicalized" (wow, he wrapped up THAT investigation quickly - especially considering he stopped the flow of information from the surviving suspect) and that the answer is greater outreach from the rest of us to make communities which are prone to self-radicalization feel more welcome and accepted. Gosh, maybe we should give them hugs when delivering their effing government checks.

@txGreg- Well, goshdarn it to blankety-heck and back again! My link was screwed up, but has now been repaired. Thanks for putting up a substitute link until my coffee (real coffee, in this instance) kicked in.

@CenTexTim- The bad news is that when you and I go in to get our liver transplants under Obamacare, they'll probably give us each other's.

@John the Econ- The estimates for Obama's time spent in "economic meetings" were extremely generous. If he had lunch with some captain of industry, that was considered an "economic meeting." In fact, it seems like most of the economic meetings he's credited with were probably nothing of the sort. And didn't he go an entire year or so without meeting with his "jobs council" before just saying to Hell with it and giving them the boot?

His goal is to make our nation into a second world socialist banana republic. Although he may not be able to stop the plunge at second world - one HHS official recently expressed concern that Obamacare may be a third world experience for Americans.

Emmentaler Limburger said...

Free! FREE! FREE! money for the taking - except for by those who actually earned it. Somebody has got to provide the money, after all...

I think the time Ă˜bama and his minions have spent on the economy - not the overt, advertised time quoted in the article, but the endless time planning its collapse - are precisely the problem. It is a masterful application of terminus to the Piven-Cloward strategy. The entrenchment has been going on for years. It's power demonstrated in the irrational re-election of this buffoon and his Santa bag. Now, watch in amazement as the system collapses! Be astounded by the riotous action as the Gimme Well dries up! Thrill to the ultimate fall of the Great Experiment!

I should have waited for the movie. Having read the book has ruined the ending for me...

CenTexTim said...

@Stilt - "the answer is greater outreach ... to make communities which are prone to self-radicalization feel more welcome and accepted"

Since the libs feel that veterans, Tea Party members, and anyone who believes in the Constitution and limited government are extremists, does that mean they'll reach out in order to make us feel more welcome and accepted?

And that was a great line about swapping livers. 'Coffee' all over the keyboard...

Colby said...

Dr. Jarlsberg, you have helped me resolve an extremely problematic dilema today. With all the rampant lunacy flowing so freely from DC, I didn't know whether to shit or go blind, but it's clear now what I must do. How much are Depends, anyway?

@John Greco,
Brilliant! Like our host, I want to see this ad on my TV. Preferrably during a Chris Matthews or Ed Schultz commercial break. PS - I used to work with someone named John Greco years ago, but if you are him, you hid your talent for Conservative humor well in those days.

Jim Hlavac said...

1) that the president doesn't spend time on the economy is probably best -- he has no idea what he's doing, and at most can muck it up. He may well be doing us an unwitting service by showing that the president shouldn't be involved in the economy at all, nor much of the government.

2) the coddling of Muslim terrorists has got to stop. And it seems as if 100% of the bombings in the past 20 years are by Muslims.

3) I'm sorry I have to mention this, but every time I hear some Republican or "conservative" again say that I'm a "radical" and "militant" "homosexual" I think of people like the Boston Bombers to put things in perspective. We never blew up anything.

4) liberals won't recognize the truth about Muslims until some liberal meeting is blown or shot up. And maybe even not then. Once you hate yourself and your culture it's hard to return to normalcy.

txGreg said...

@Jim Hlavac, (#4) they won't even recognize the truth then. In their world, it will be self-evident that the Muslims will have been so deeply wounded by the hatred of those evil conservatives that they just blindly lashed out in their grief. It's not their fault, it's ours.

American Cowboy said...

My local paper reported on Barry's finding that the Boston bombers were "self-radicalized" as a direct result of the internet.

While it was only one sentence at the end of the article I have a bad premonition about where that will be going in the not so distant future. Without exception it appears that EVERY statement like that, if true, from the mouth of the celebrity-in-chief precedes another attack on our freedoms as American citizens.

Karl Uppiano said...

Kaboom! Your tax dollars at work. Certainly not your father's highway project though.

Suzy said...

Thank you. I thought I was the only one who thought it seemed a bit unfair that the dudes who did the worst crimes get the benefit of the best free lawyers....while Zimmerman has to pay for his own lawyer, for example....

Anonymous said...

"We were going to say "bang for the buck" - but sadly, that's exactly what we got by funding the thieving, drug-using Tsarnaev family instead of shipping their jihad-loving asses out of the country when we had the chance."

But..but..they voted Democrat, how could we turn them away? *eye roll*

The notion that we must take everyone in only became in vogue when Democrats figured it could be used to their advantage. We don't need immigration reform, we need enforce existing laws and reform the way we ship people the hell out of here...expeditiously, US born kids or not.

It's No Gouda said...

Yeah, Anonymous, if all those "immigrants" pledged to vote Republican you can bet there'd be a whole different attitube toward them by the lefties.
There would be calls for a 30ft high fence backed up by minefields and troops with order to "shoot to kill".

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Emmentaler- I'm with you; I believe the vast majority of Obama's time working on the economy has been with the goal of destroying it in its present form (ie, capitalism).

@CenTexTim- Barry was quite clever in his whole "self-radicalization" pronouncement: it simultaneously suggested that there is no need to investigate further into the Tsarnaev's associates, while also laying the groundwork for more invasive surveillance of individuals (Tea Party, conservatives, Constitutionalists, etc). I do not, however, expect outreach from Barry to make us feel more included in the American Quilt.

@Colby- The price of Depends varies widely depending on whether you buy them new or used.

@Jim Hlavac- I agree with all of your points, but will say (re: point 4) that even if a bunch of liberals are blown to hell and gone by radical Islamics, the Left will still blame the Right for the "intolerance" which created the atmosphere of hate.

@txGreg- I wrote my response above before reading yours. We're certainly in agreement!

@American Cowboy- Your radar is working properly: this is going to be used as another excuse to monitor Internet accounts of the politically unfavored (hint: that's us, not radical Islam).

@Karl Uppiano- Whatever happened to the days when our taxes went to the WPA to create national parks instead of going to terrorists to create national tragedies?

@Suzy- The Obama Administration is making sure the surviving murderer is given 5-star, velvet glove treatment to signal to the world what swell sports we are about terrorism - the theory being that this will make terrorists less likely to strike us. Of course, that's instead, we're using tax dollars to encourage future attacks and safeguard the "rights" of the terrorists.

@Anonymous- I couldn't agree more. We need to seal the borders NOW, and deport those who are here illegally. Does that sound heartless? Tough. Unless laws have consequences, then lawlessness will be the rule of the land. (Which, surprise, is currently the case).

@It's No Gouda- Liberals would never give such "shoot to kill" orders, but they probably would legalize "extended post-natal abortions" for conservative immigrants of all ages.

It's No Gouda said...

Stilton; I'm sure "extended post-natal abortions" were what Bill Ayres had in mind when they estimated they would have to kill 25-30 million Americans to establish their "utopia".

PRY said...

I am so stinkin appalled, but not surprised, at the 'leadeship' in
DC's actions that I really am virtually speechless. This administration, and Congress, is unbelievable!

Chuck said...

The spammers got through (i.e.: took the time to prove they could read, but did not prove their humanity). Who do they think will actually click on their links ... especially when the obviously can't even speak English?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Chuck- I've now nuked the two spam posts which sounded like they were written by the Tsarnaevs' cousins in the old country. Sheesh.

JustaJeepGuy said...

Is it wrong to wish you could nuke some of the Tsarnaev's cousins in any country?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

JustaJeepGuy- Speaking strictly in the hypothetical sense: no, not at all.

John Greco said...

Hi boys, girls, transgender, gays, lesbians, undocumented aliens, and monitories who practice a different faith! Do you know what time it is? Yes, it’s time for our favorite television program, “Barry’s World!”

In today’s episode, we see little Barry taking on the most important role of his career. And, do you know what it is? R-E-S-P-O-N-S-I-B-I-L-I-T-Y. That’s a big word and a big job for our little Barry, don’t you think so?

Oh, no…It looks like our little Barry got himself way over his head by making crank calls with the AP, taking on the mean, old bullies from the Tea Party group by using the IRS, and that little scaffold with Ben Ghazi.

Silly Barry…

What would he do next...?