Wednesday, February 11, 2015

Duck And Coverage

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, msnbc, harris-perry, holder, duck, deliverance
The day Holder found out what "Lean Forward" actually means.
Things took a decidedly weird turn this week when alleged news network MSNBC's Melissa "Super Absorbency" Harris-Perry interviewed Attorney General Eric "Real Purty Mouth" Holder and asked him to quack like a duck.

The bizarre request was predicated by Ms. Harris-Perry's revelation that she and her imaginary fans have nicknamed Holder "The Duck." Which made sense to Hope n' Change since we assumed it was her way of crediting the outgoing Attorney General with helping the Obama Administration "duck" Benghazi, Fast & Furious, Illegal Immigration, the IRS scandals and more.

But noOOooo. The reason he's called "The Duck" is because, in Holder's words, "for an African-American guy, the thing was to be cool, you know? You gotta be cool." So he always tries to present a calm demeanor on the surface, but "those little duck feet are just moving as fast as they can underneath!"

Frankly, this is an image which we'd really rather not have in our heads, because we now also visualize Holder gobbling soaking wet bread crusts and cluelessly squirting diarrhea as he waddles aimlessly around the Department of Justice. Although in fairness, we were imaging those things long before we heard of this whole "duck" business.

In the interest of trying to find something - anything - nice to say about this idiocy, we'll concede that Ms. Harris-Perry is every bit as good a journalist as Mr. Holder has been an Attorney General.

We just wish that both of them would hurry up and get the flock out of here.

obama, obama jokes, political, humor, cartoon, conservative, hope n' change, hope and change, stilton jarlsberg, brian williams, lie, french quarter, holder

BREAKING UPDATE: Brian Williams has officially been suspended from NBC without pay for six months. In the interim, another liar will take his place on the NBC Might Be News.

BONUS: Check out Lefty Lucy's understated reaction to the news about Jon Stewart leaving the Daily Show.


George in Houtx said...

with regards to Brian Williams and his "French Quarter" story ..... I would like to think that I am not the only person who knows why the "French Quarter" was built where it is. at one time, that was THE downtown New Orleans. it was built there because people had noticed over the years (and thru many hurricanes) that area did not flood. granted, over the years, more sediment has been deposited and the water level must rise in order to push past the longer delta area. still, the word I got from cousins living in the area was that the "Quarter" did NOT flood. barely got water over the curbs!

Geoff King said...

I wonder which of the twelve MSNBC viewers brought this embarrassing moment to our attention? I suppose Holder does resemble a duck in that he consistantly gives "the bird" to the Constitution and the American people. His FASTand FURIOUS little duck feet do tend to dance around the law quite well, and the taxpayers always get stuck with the "bill". Perhaps the good folks over at Duck Dynasty could invite him out for a little target practice some time.

REM1875 said...

Choke, gasp, snort, whoo wee, damned coffee hurts when comes out your nose. Doc you are one twisted mother- I like that. We'll off to change out of coffee soaked clothes and dry out things on my desk. I owe you.

REM1875 said...

For our younger viewers there was a movie called 'Deliverance'and that guy in doc's cartoon is james carville back when he had hair.

Grafton Cheddar said...

Don't you think Melitha Harrith Pewwy would make for a good newsreader? She can absorb all the facts, and no one would dare pull the plug on her...

TrickyRicky said...

There is a word that I think of when Holder is mentioned. I does rhyme with duck......

FlyBoy said...

As tho anybody watches MSNBC. Gilligan's Island reruns get more viewers than the propaganda arm of the Dem. party.....

Judi King said...

Funny stuff! Isn't it great how the left daily provides humorous fodder?

Paladin said...

I thought of him as the duck because whenever I heard him talk I always heard, "Quack quack quack quack justice quack quack quack accountable quack quack quack quack quack quack quack."

CenTexTim said...

Speaking of media personalities, a liberal friend of mine (yes, I have a few) posted this on FB after hearing about Jon Stewart leaving The Daily Show:

"How the heck am I going to get the news of the world NOW? Kidding...sort of."


Shelly said...

OMG, Stilt. You hit a home run on this one. I literally laughed out loud both for your post and the comments too.

John the Econ said...

I am (momentarily) speechless.

You are interviewing one of the most powerful people in the world, and that is what you want to talk about?

What ever happened to adult supervision in this country?

But then again, is this any more absurd than having the (formerly) most powerful person in the world interviewed by some quackpot only otherwise known for making YouTube videos of herself in a bathtub filled with breakfast cereal? Can you imagine Winston Churchill or Ronald Reagan acquiescing to such irrelevance and silliness?

On the other hand, perhaps this is good strategy at this point for members of the Obama administration. With our international credibility all but gone, Islamic fanaticals running amok everywhere and a still mediocre economy here at home, I'm sure the last thing Holder and Obama want or need at this dismal point are real interviews with real journalists asking questions about real issues. So instead, they'll happily chat with the goofuses at BMSNBC and web freaks, where they can be assured that no serious questions will be asked or answers demanded, and the entire focus will be on the circus freaks instead of the issues of the day.

Speaking of things that this administration would love not to have to talk about:

Obama is taking heat again this week for saying that the attack at the Jewish deli in Paris was merely "random" and had nothing to do with Jews and again referring to the Islamic assault on western civilization as a mere "law enforcement issue".

So once again, a demonstration that to this administration, shouting "allahu akbar!" and killing a room full of Jews isn't an Islamic attack, or even a "hate crime". It's just something "random" that happened in Paris one day, just like Fort Hood was just another episode of "workplace violence" in Texas.

And now we learn this:

Intel Community Believes Kayla Mueller Given As Bride To ISIS Fighter

Another multiculturalism success story. So not only do Kayla's family now grieve over their forever lost daughter, they now have to deal with the knowledge that before she died she was tortured and raped by these animals as a "bride".

And where are the feminist alphabets? Any other topic, and CNN would be wall-to-wall on it. They got so animated about the largely phony campus rape culture story. But here's a real literally honest-to-god rape culture, and they're silent. That's very telling.

Colby Muenster said...

As the old saying goes... If it walks like a racist piece of condensed owl shit, and talks like a racist piece of condensed owl shit, then it must be a racist piece of condensed owl shit.

And who the hell is Melissa Harris Perry? Any relation to that oddly dressed woman that was lip syncing to random noise at the Super Bowl?

I THOUGHT that guy looked familiar. And don't forget Carville's greatest role, "my precious."

Yes, it rhymes and is usually followed by the words "him and the horse he rode in on." We can only dream about what this POS deserves, and that's 20 to life. Maybe some day he'll be walking down the street minding his own bidness, and some "gentle giant" will decide he needs Eric the Unjust's shoes to round out his pants on the ground wardrobe.

Brian Williams suspended for 6 months? If the Nothing but Barack Channel thinks it will take that long for it's audience to forgive and forget, they really DON'T know their audience, do they? Two weeks tops... Or just release a story about a bunch of barbaric murderers (Christians), or maybe a good Republican sex scandal. Doesn't have to be true; you can retract on a holiday at 3 AM.

@John the Econ,
Yes, but (as Whoopee Goldberg said), was it "rape" rape. Huge double standard concerning the definition of rape in the libtard world.

DougM said...

Perhaps she meant "Duke, Bill," not "Duck of Death."

John the Econ said...

Since Kayla was given as a "bride" to some ISIS thug, is Kayla’s death just another case of "domestic violence" instead of "terrorism" in the eyes of the Obama Administration?

Pamecon said...

I will throw this out for anybody who cares to comment.
I've been thinking about it for a while Re Obama's WH crew:

As a college professor I am not inclined to look for blatant discrimination and prejudice against Whites.

But when you see what happened to the GM Bondholders, to our Veterans and the VA hospitals atrocity, to middle class taxpayers who lost that college-savings account, and to various people systematically getting shafted by Obamacare (not to mention the illegal immigrant open borders "invit," by the WH), I start to wonder:

What is the percentage?

In other words do Obama and VJ have a 'cut score' - a percentage of White U.S. citizens they're looking to hit by changing these many various programs, as a form of "pay back"?

I know this sounds paranoid, but - you have to start wondering. Is there a pattern, here?

What minimum percentage of "typical" Whites need to be adversely impacted, for it to "qualify" for an active WH policy move?

Never mind that millions (of Caucasians) died in various wars including the Civil War, to liberate people, or that over 20 Trillion in tax dollars have been poured into Great Society programs to assisted those from historically disadvantaged backgrounds who experienced horrible rights violations.

They (the WH academics) don't care about any of those existing paybacks, the lives lost, or generous public sector compensations. They're insane Marxists. They don't even care that many Whites help liberate Slaves at great cost, or that some minorities owned slaves,and were complicit in the slave trade. They are collectivists, not individualists - don't care about individual actions or choices.

There must be some "percentage" number, they look for. That % means it's a "Go" for that policy's fundamental transformation.

What is it -- 50% of those to be harmed are from white European backgrounds? 65%? 90%?

I bet most of the retired people who owned GM stocks were pro'ly Caucasian, I dunno.

"What is the percentage?" That will be my new Tag line over at Free Republic....

Anonymous said...

In re: Brian Williams' suspension w/o pay for 6 months: I doubt he's gonna miss 6 months' worth of his $13,000,000 annual salary. My heart cries for him.

John the Econ said...

@Pamecon, if it is indeed the Obama Administration's goal to punish whites, then all they've done is to cut off their noses to spite their faces. Probably no group has been punished more by the policies of this administration than the black community.

What everyone needs, especially non-white America is a vibrant economy, which you are never going to get with this crew. I'm always praying that they will figure this out sooner than later.

John the Econ said...

Again, off-topic but this is just too rich to pass up:

Street Artist Combo Brutally Attacked for Pacifist Tag Post

Many times here I've expressed my contempt for those insipid "Coexist!" bumper stickers I see all over town, especially around the university. No doubt the owners believe their making some deep, bold statement about "peace" in the world. But just how bold is it really to make such a statement in the safest, most tolerant country in the world? Try driving around with that bumper sticker in China, anywhere in the Middle East (outside of Israel) or even in certain neighborhoods in Britain or France and see what happens to you. Only then will I be impressed.

Well, the street artist "Combo" did, and paid for it.

"But in Paris, this particular iteration of the popular inscription—here, created by the street artist Combo, who also pasted a life-size photo of himself next to it—didn't go down well with everybody. Le Monde reports that four young people asked the artist to remove it last weekend, and beat him up severely when he refused to do so.

Combo ended up with a dislocated shoulder and many bruises.

Combo declined to discuss the identity of his assailants. “It would only add fuel to the fire," he told the French newspaper."

In other words, if the attackers were straight white males, he wouldn't hesitate reporting it. Once again, no Islam to see here.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@George in Houtx- I'll admit that I hadn't known that fact about the topology of the French Quarter - but anyone who covered hurricane Katrina while in Louisiana sure should have.

@Geoff King- Somehow, I just know that if a conservative called Holder "The Duck," it would be considered racist.

@REM1875- Dang. That is Carville!

@Grafton Cheddar- What's more, she started her journalistic career as a stringer.

@TrickyRicky- About every third word out of my mouth these days rhymes with "duck"...

@FlyBoy- It's good that MSNBC has almost no viewership, but it then begs the question about why Holder would waste his precious time there instead of visiting a news outlet where he'd actually get seen. Like, oh, Fox News.

@Judi King- If we could just find a way to turn idiocy into electricity, the Left would be an unending source of clean energy.

@Paladin- Yeah, that sounds pretty familiar.

@CenTexTim- The Lefties are in real mourning for the impending departure of Stewart. I've been recommending that they switch to "Red Eye" with Greg Gutfeld, but I don't think they'll do it. (By the way, if you're not watching/recording "Red Eye" nightly, you should be. It's one of our favorite shows in the Jarlsberg household!)

@Shelly- Glad you enjoyed it. And frankly, I'm enjoying the fantasy of Holder, Obama, and Biden going camping in Deliverance country...

@John the Econ- Obama's comment about the "random folks" killed in the kosher deli was mind-blowing. He simply could not be a bigger apologist for radical Islamic terror.

Regarding Kayla Mueller, you're right that the "war on women" crowd should be marching in the streets over her enslavement, rape, and eventual death (very likely at the hands of ISIS).

@Colby Muenster- You're right that the folks who watched Brian Williams will "forgive and forget" in a lot less than 6 months. But perhaps NBC knew that there was worse news to come, and so kicked him out to call a halt to further investigation. In any event, they're going to come out millions of dollars ahead on the deal by suspending him without pay.

@DougM- You've just reminded me to watch "Unforgiven" again.

@John the Econ- Excellent (if tragic) point.

@Pamecon- While I believe that Barry has an active animosity towards whites, I think his policies are designed more to punish the "haves" and in favor of the "have nots." Even if the "haves" who are affected don't have much (he's perfectly happy to bring down the middle class; in fact, it's essential to his longer term socialistic goals).

@Anonymous- Brian Williams won't be going hungry anytime soon, but $6.5 million has got to hurt. Especially since it's unlikely that he'll ever be seeing that $13 million a year again after his suspension and "reality-hab."

@John the Econ- Right you are, but Obama and company most certainly don't want a vibrant economy because it would free people from government servitude.

Regarding the street artist in Paris, it sort of sounds like he goes out of his way to provoke people. But as the saying goes, Ars Gratia Artis (translation: Artists Are Grating).

The Erstwhile Emmentaler Limburger said...

Love the Brian Williams cartoon, Stilt

The Erstwhile Emmentaler Limburger said...

(I would have expected a Duck Dynasty hunt cartoon. Maybe later...)