Friday, June 27, 2014

Irony Deficiency


Readers- I'm actually not kidding; I was getting ready to create today's post (and considering making the topic the computer crashes at the IRS and now the EPA) when my own computer went kaflooey and gifted me with the "white screen of death" - which would actually be a pretty good new name for the Washington Redskins.

Unlike Lois Lerner, I have everything backed up and I have incentive to fix my computer. And actually I'm making progress already, but it's going to be a long process and pretty effectively nukes my limited time window to create a real cartoon and commentary today.

And dang it, there was plenty to talk about. Not just suspicious hard drive crashes, but the SCOTUS telling the POTUS that his use of recess appointment power is a POS. In economic news, the GDP is suddenly shriveling like a salted slug. And of course there's talk about the House of Representatives filing a lawsuit against Barack Obama for blatant usurpation of their Constitutional powers and, in general, being a huge douche nozzle.

But can I feast on all this red meat? NooOOoooo - I've got to spend hours verifying disk permissions and doing PRAM reboots and SMU resets and fighting kernel panics and re-routing power to my flux capacitor. All of which would be darn hard even if I was cold sober, which I certainly don't plan to be.

UPDATE...

Many hours (and much of a box of sleazy chardonnay) later, the computer seems to be running again - though I'm suspicious that it may be trying to lure me into a false sense of security. For now, I'll keep my guard up.

But just to test things out, I put together the hard-hitting topical graphic below. See? It wasn't a complete waste of time for you to visit today!

obama, obama jokes, political, cartoon, humor, clinton, hillary, lewinsky, finger, dead broke, stilton jarlsberg, hope n' change, hope and change, conservative

35 comments:

Chuck Baker said...

Computer crashes are never fun ... glad you are getting over yours. You have a backup (which is good) but unlike the IRS or EPA, you are NOT required to have one by law. I would say the whole situation smells fishy, but I like fish! Head should roll, but none will ... or at least the ones that should will not. Crimes have been committed and the powers that should hold the criminals accountable are in cahoots with them instead.

TrickyRicky said...

Bill, Bill, Bill stop pointing that damn finger at me you lying disbarred bastard. Nonetheless, you must admit that she has plenty of assets. Even the best of Omar the Tentmaker pantsuits can't hide toxic assets like that.

Grumpy Curmudgeon said...

To quote an IRS Commissioner, "Ain't Technology a B****!"; and now thanks to Bubba, I've got coffee all over my computer.

Wahoo said...

I bet Slick Willy didn't even have the couth to wash his hands before pointing his stinky finger in our faces on national TV.

Colby Muenster said...

Stilton,
Yes, so many juicy bits of blog fodder lately, and your alleged "non-post" looks suspiciously like a post to me, so no apologies necessary.

Of course we all know that O'Liar and his gang of miscreants will never actually PAY for raping the USA and her citizenry, but it is sure fun watching them finally squirm and scramble on a daily basis. Even Okra Winfrey and some of the MSM are starting to say, "Hey! Wait a minute..."

Stilt said, "I'm suspicious that it may be trying to lure me into a false sense of security." I know the feeling. Does your computer have a big, red eye that says "HAL" over it?

Stan da Man said...

Thanks, TrickyRicky, I was going to go there, or at least in an allusion, butt thanks to you, I don't have to...
Still have to use a heavy dose of the brain bleach, and we'll raise a toast to Omar's assistants who have to actually measure, track, and cover those assets...

Geoff King said...

I do not own a computer and consider them obsolete. I instead have an upper-end "genius" phone. I can connect a full size keyboard, printer, HDTV, credit card reader, and practically any device via it's WiFi, Bluetooth, or USB interfaces. With only 32G of internal memory, data storage is lacking, but with the plethora of cloud services available that becomes a non-issue. I believe I have the capability of usng my device to run a large corporation or banking firm - possibly without even requiring a bailout. Also, unlike a PC, I can surf the web while sitting on a mountain ridge in the forest, plus it contains a GPS navigation system, and even an infrared programmable remote control which allows me to have a certain bartender convinced that her workplace is haunted because the tv randomly turns on and off and changes channels apparently all by itself. Oh, and it also makes phone calls.
On the claim by the EPA that their hard drive has also crashed, can you blame them? They need to try that workable excuse before the SHTF - and in their case, it has already hit the hallway.
http://www.shtfplan.com/headline-news/shock-epa-employees-asked-to-stop-defecating-in-office-hallways_06262014

CenTexTim said...

By recovering your lost files you have just proved yourself unfit for government work.

As for a limp Boehner threatening to sue obama, don't hold your breath. So far all he's done is stimulate cash flow to the DCCC.

"Speaker John Boehner’s announcement that House Republicans would sue President Barack Obama for misusing executive authority turned into a big payday for congressional Democrats."

txGreg said...

The second cartoon for today provides great clarification for Hillary's previous comments. When she claimed they were "Dead Broke," she was obviously referring to their (ongoing) complete moral bankruptcy. Now I get it...

Bruce Bleu said...

Stilton,
Under lamont insane obama's stellar "leadership", (what's that... a big boat full of fishing line?), he stands at the helm of a 2.9% DROP in growth for the U.S. economy with a REAL unemployment rate of around 11% and we are expected to kiss his bony ass and do obeisance to him, while George W. Satan had 4.7% GROWTH with 4.5% unemployment and we were in a TERRIBLE recession! Are the bulk of Americans that damned STUPID, or do I live in a perpetual NIGHTMARE with the BEAST living in MY White House?!!!
Chuck Baker,
"Head should roll...", I see you got in a Clinton comment there.
Colby,
I wonder if "The Chocolate Fluff" had some "under the counter" pharmaceuticals would she be referred to as "Fried Okra Winfrey"?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Chuck Baker- I don't for a second buy the claims that hard drive crashes destroyed relevant emails - and that afterwards, tape backups were "routinely" recycled. Moreover, I read today that when Lerner requested tech help for her allegedly crashed drive, she said only that she wanted to recover some personal files - she never mentioned retrieving emails in any of her correspondence with the techies. Bogus, bogus, bogus.

@TrickyRicky- Perhaps in honor of Barry's desire to "spread the wealth," Hillary's assets have been spreading out for years.

@Grumpy Curmudgeon- Hey, I wonder if Lerner crashed her computer when reading Hope n' Change and doing a spit take with her coffee?

@Wahoo- I'm pretty sure he lets the finger air dry so he can enjoy it later.

@Colby- Like you, I'm enjoying seeing Barry being squeezed a bit, but I don't hold out any hope that he'll really have to pay for his many crimes.

@John the Econ- It really seems like neither ignorance nor incompetence quite accounts for these missing emails; rather, people had to get pro-active to destroy (er, "recycle") backups and suddenly cancel third party archiving services.

I think it's time to threaten the techies with some serious slammer time to see if they'll talk.

@Stan da Man- For some reason (talk of brain bleach?) you just made me think of Hillary twerking. I threw up in my mouth a little.

@Geoff King- I don't own a smart phone. In fact, I have more of a "short bus" phone, and it's still too confusing for me to use.

I can, however, at least appreciate smart phones and all that can be done with them. Glad to hear that it sounds like you use yours for productivity rather than distraction.

And regarding the EPA employee(s) pooping in the hall, I wonder if it might be tech support people imported from India? I'm really not being racist saying that - India has a huge problem with people refusing to use toilets and defecating everywhere. Which is why they created this catchy Mister Poo campaign to make toilets seem fun. (Before you decide to skip the linked video, ask yourself if you've ever seen party-loving turds flocking to a mirrored disco ball?)

@CenTexTim- Oh, I'm totally unfit for government work. When it comes to bureaucracy, I'm one of those "does not play well with others" types.

And I'm not surprised that the Dems are using the threatened lawsuit as a fundraising tool. They are such whores.

@txGreg- You're right, Hillary should have claimed moral bankruptcy. No one would have questioned it.

@Bruce Bleu- It's funny (in that entirely not funny way) that the MSM doesn't seem to care a whit about the 2.9% (annual) drop in the GDP. "Aw shucks," they're saying, "that's just a hiccup because of a cold winter. You know, climate change!"

Actually, they're half-right... thanks to Obamacare, the business climate has changed and the economy is feeling the chill.

Jim Hlavac said...

The idea that there's one and only one set of these emails is so fraudulent as to be beyond belief ... the idea that emails are like pieces of paper that once burned are lost for ever is blatantly false. And doesn't the gov't have a "cloud" somewhere where these things are stored? Are they're systems that primitive? I've had hard-drives fail -- they have hard drive readers at any computer repair store - wondrous things - plug in the hard drive -- everything is right were it was ...

The idea that Boehner is going to "sue" the president is ludicrous -- surely the Congress can subpoena the president to come testify, yes? Isn't their job to oversee what the executive branch is doing? Of what need are all these committees and investigative offices if we have to hire outside lawyers and go to a judge to find answers?

You know, when and if we find the Black Box for the Malaysian jet, it'll be amazing what the NTSB can get off its harddrive -- maybe send the NTSB over to the IRS - -surely there's been a train wreck ...

And I just hate it when people wag their fingers in my face ...

π said...

Flux capacitor?!?!?!?!?!

Um, how do you know it was not the IRS/NSA matrix? I suspect foul play, sir.

Maybe Joe Biden is not as stupid as he acts? A Biden hack?

Mr. Parker is telling that last one was stupid.

Judi King said...

Yes, the bulk of the American people ARE that stupid. If they even bother to catch some news, they obviously never bother to check facts. P.S. a neighbor of mine doesn't even know who Lois Lerner is. WTF

Geoff King said...

@ Stilton- Your dancing poo video is decidedly more tasteful than the singing poo...I mean, singing members of congress video I supplied two days ago.

John the Econ said...

@Jim Hlavac, of course there are more than 1 set of files containing the "missing" e-mail. The mere fact that the IRS, EPA, and no doubt eventually every other corrupt government agency even floats this absurd meme is because they know the vast majority of their core audience is either ignorant, or wishes to remain ignorant. Competent IT people are not that rare in the US to ask or correct this absurd notion.

But for those who are not aware, e-mail in most business & government settings doesn't exclusively reside on a desktop or laptop PC, but is aggregated, stored, and archived on servers. And in fact, these servers are almost always equipped with multiple, redundant hard drives, where the data is duplicated and spread across 2 or more drives. If a single drive does in fact fail, the data still is accessible on a 2nd, 3rd, or more redundant drives. This arrangement is so efficient in fact, that when a drive does fail, the users are not even aware of it. The systems administrator replaces the failed drive, and the data is restored as before, sometimes even without system disruption on more robust systems.

And contrary to the meme that the Democrats are likely to float regarding the "lack of funding" for such systems, we live in an age where hard drives with terabytes of storage are only a couple hundred dollars. I find it impossible to believe that massive government bureaucracies such as the IRS and EPA lack the IT infrastructure that even most of the mom & pop businesses I've consulted for over the years have.

I wasn't joking when I said that if the problem is in fact "funding", then it's only because they're currently spending too much on pornography or employees who don't actually do anything, much less show up.

The game plan that Obama and these agencies are using is clear: Float the "hard drive ate our homework" story which will happily be absorbed by the low-information voters, and then blame any residual outrage on the Tea Party and Fox news.

The only question is that how many not-as-low info Democrats are going to continue to swallow that.

Anonymous said...

Hard Times demand Hard Liquor, but a box of Chardonnay will do in a pinch.

deadmau5.1 said...

Ms. King -

Now that takes the cake but it really shouldn't surprise me. This kind of ignorance is what the Dems are counting on to get away with their criminality. And it clearly is criminality - destroying evidence. There simply is no way for these emails to "disappear" from such a crash.

And speaking of stupid ....

And Mr. Hlavac -

No, while the Congress can subpoena the executive branch, the latter will just claim separation or powers or executive privilege and ignore the subpoena. The Congress does have the ultimate power but what it is precisely (other than withholding funding) I am not sure. But impeachment is always an option, I suppose. That is though, only an indictment. Obama is clearly pushing the envelope - but until the electorate starts complaining - nothing.

Jim Hlavac said...

Thanks, everyone, for all the links, um, "tech support," interesting little sidelines, clarifications, elucidations and such, and the other items that I come to enjoy and rely on here ...




St. John the Reconn said...

From the left-leaning MarketWatch.

The key quote:
'Meanwhile, it’s not just Boehner who’s upset with the president, if a new book is to be believed. Hillary Clinton called Obama “incompetent and feckless” and charged he had “no hand on the tiller half the time” during a reunion in May 2013 with college friends, according to the book “Blood Feud” by Edward Klein. Klein wrote: “When her friends asked Hillary to tell them what she thought – really thought – about the president she had served for four draining years, she lit into Obama with a passion that surprised them all.”'

So, ya think that will be his defense during impeachment proceedings?

Judi King said...

Only if it will further her goal of first woman president.

John the Econ said...

@Anonymous, I doubt that they even bothered to try to destroy any "evidence". There is no need to. (Even if their IT infrastructure was just marginally competent, doing so completely would be practically impossible) Management simply had a meeting, decided that this was to be their story, and they're going to stick to it. And as long as everyone at the IRS is aboard, for which it seems that they are, what's going to happen? Eric Holder isn't going to act. Congress can't or won't do anything without "evidence" that they can't get without the IRS's cooperation. The only way that Congress could put the screws to the IRS and make them behave would be to cut off funding. And they're certainly not going to do that.

So it's done. They'll get away with it. And the IRS emboldened for doing so. Obama will go on repeating that this is a Tea Party/Fox news conspiracy and the media will play on with that. Oh, the IRS will lay off the non-profits for awhile, but don't worry. They'll be back to their old tricks, and with some new ones by 2016...

Anonymous said...

John the Econ,

"Destruction of Evidence", "interfering with an investigation", "withholding evidence", "lying to investigators", blah, blah, blah. Whatever. 6 of one, half a dozen of the other.

It's all corrupt. Call it what you will. That is simply rearranging the deck chairs, as it were.

For progressives, the end ALWAYS justifies the means. Hence Obama's power grabs. These people are evil - and they will take over the government, rescind the Constitution, if they think they can get away with it.

For the good of all ....

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Jim Hlavac- After having seen Healthcare.gov, I pretty much can believe that the IRS computer system is a complete failure. But not enough to explain the multiple crashes and complete failure to recover files.

Regarding Boehner's lawsuit, I'm all for it - though don't expect it to accomplish much. Still, it might reign in Obama's abuse of executive power. Here's hoping, anyway.

@π - My computer didn't crash in the interesting kind of way that an NSA virus or hack would cause. No, my (admittedly old) computer just decided it was thinking too hard and then went totally blank. Which, in truth, I think it learned from me.

@Judi King- Lois Lerner? Benghazi? VA hospitals? To liberals, these are all Trivial Pursuit answers.

@Geoff King- The dancing poo video (from India) was not only entertaining, but it convinced me to start using a commode.

The singing, swaying politicians, on the other hand, caused me to lose my lunch in that same commode.

@John the Econ- Sadly, there are plenty of people who consider all things computerish to be some form of dark and impenetrable magic - and they're only too happy to believe that a crashed hard drive can not only wipe out emails (wherever they reside) but probably also contribute to global warming and meteor showers.

But then, the symbiotic relationship between the Obama administration and freaking idiots isn't exactly breaking news. I've been covering it right here for nearly six years...

@Anonymous- Usually, I'm a Black Velvet Canadian Whiskey man in times of crisis. But I went with Corbett Canyon chardonnay (I named both brands, hoping to get a free case) because I was only distressed and inconvenienced rather than insanely tooth-clenchingly rage filled. It's more of an art than a science...

@deadmau5.1- Oh sure, $104 million sounds like a lot of money, but have you priced boxes of macaroni and cheese lately?

Per the Boehner situation, you're quite right - Congress can't do much other than cut funds, which
Barry would enjoy using as a truncheon heading into this year's elections. Similarly, an impeachment would really go nowhere. Dang it.

And interesting to read that the IRS has spent $4.4 billion on their rotten tech services. Gimme a break - they could have given every employee a $20 thumbdrive and automatically backed everything up.

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Jim Hlavac- There have been a lot of good links, discussions, digressions, and opinions here today. And this after I basically bailed out of doing a real cartoon and only posted about my computer failure.

In complete seriousness, I'm delighted and humbled by all of the good folks who come to this site.

@Rosie Palms-Durbin- Obama going it alone on immigration?! I'm shocked! SHOCKED!

No wait - it's exactly what I'd expect. And it makes me mad enough to piss blood (dang it, now I do need some Black Velvet whiskey...)

@Anonymous- Before I say anything else, let me genuflect in the direction of Charles Krauthammer. I love that guy.

Regarding the technical stuff, which you clearly know way more than I do, the whole story from the IRS just doesn't wash. C'mon - the IRS techies said that a hard drive had "bad sectors" (ooOOooh!) and so nothing could be recovered? Geez - $4 billion spent on technology and they couldn't buy a copy of Norton Disk Doctor?

And as you point out, even if the techies were nitwits it doesn't explain why the IRS didn't try harder to obey the freakin' law and send the drive to a data recovery service. Or - and I'm going way out on a limb here - retrieving the files from the backup tape copies before recycling said tape.

Nothing about this passes the sniff test.

@St. John the Reconn- I'd have loved to have been a fly on the wall for Hillary's dissection of Obama. I believe to the soles of my shoes that Obama is both incompetent and disinterested.

@Judi King- When I even think of Hillary as president, I genuinely feel sick inside.

@John the Econ- Your summary is, sadly and as usual, dead on. The IRS is simply going to continue to say "eff you" to Congress, and not a damn thing will come of it. My one glimmer of hope is that some heat might be applied to lower level functionaries who would reveal useful information. But I'm not holding my breath.

@Honcho- Outstanding!

PamEcon said...

They will use the alleged "crashes" to insist once again that their IT & other gov agencies are "underfunded." Who isn't totally fed up with hearing that? The teacher unions pull the same stunt -- always complaining they're "underfunded," they "lack sufficient resources," and yaddablah. All of these hyped-up complaints and threats presupposes the taxpayers with their own IT woes are somehow "overfunded," and sitting on these big piles of cash ready to hand over to these freakin rent-seekers. Who Isn't 'underfunded,' you money-laundering grifters! If you can't produce within budget, let's privatize your operation, open it up to competitive bids, and you go find employment at a foot-massage parlor someplace...

Dodger Blues said...

@PamEcon

Spot on. The size and bloating of the federal government is mind-boggling. Hey, IRS needs more money, sh1tcan the Dept of Commerce, or Education, or whatever. One can easily get this money elsewhere. But your point is more valid - bureaucracies, BY DEFINITION, are always underfunded. It is in the genetic code of a bureaucracy to expand its budget, its turf. That's what they do.

And its in the DNA of Democrats to buy votes. Do the Chi-Town Hustle....

Comrade said...

From the morons at Slate:

http://www.slate.com/articles/technology/future_tense/2014/06/isis_water_scarcity_is_climate_change_destabilizing_iraq.single.html

Anonymous said...

Um .... spell checker struck again. "Shot" was supposed to "sh1t". Hmmm .... scary.

Geoff King said...

So, just why did the DHS order 40,000 pair of men's extra large underwear? Are the hordes of children streaming across our Southern Border perhaps obese and not the starving waifs the MSM would like us to believe; or are a good percentage of them in the barely not a legal adult catagory and need the extra clothing to help conceal their gang and cartel tats?
http://mobile.wnd.com/2014/06/why-do-border-children-need-mens-underwear/?cat_orig=us

Honcho said...

Honcho here.

Hey Geoff - 'suppose I could use some of those. You got a contact number? Drank a little too much Patrón and soiled my only pair, if you know what I mean. Damn cattle keep sneakin' up on me. The life of a cowpoke (NOT A SEXUAL ORIENTATION).

Mushos gracias, amigo.

Wahoo said...

Oh gawd, Nancy Pilosi's been snorting fairy dust again...

Anonymous said...

Wahoo -

Pelosi is simply welcoming all the new Democratic voters to the US. I suspect she is putting them thru orientation to explain all of the free handouts they will get in return for voting the Democratic party line.

She is also brushing up on her Spanish. ¡Ándale!¡Vamos! ¿Tiene usted algún papel higiénico? ¡Por favor, siempre votar por los demócratas o voy a hacer pis en usted!

Omar al Tikriti said...

I keep asking how much for this woman but no one answers. She is doing bad in your country of Texas. So OK, she will do good here. Like most of her ilk (yes, big word in a small package - just like her), she is good at vivisection. We need that here in Tikrit. And, yes, she is no virgin but there are too many smelly men here - I NEED her. How much, please?

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

@Omar al Tikriti- In our country, the going rate for a two bit whore is, unsurprisingly, two bits (slang for 25¢). This will be an entirely acceptable price for Hillary, and if you find the 25¢ burdensome, the citizenry of the U.S. will happily set up a longterm payment plan for you.

One word of warning: the price does not including shipping and handling so you'll have to arrange that on your own.