Monday, October 4, 2010

Meet Depressed

A recently released study shows that nearly 10% of Americans are suffering the symptoms of depression...with the rate significantly higher among those who, ironically, aren't getting hired.

Scientists say that the real numbers are probably even worse, because the study didn't collect data from prisoners or the homeless...although both groups can presumably be measured while
being driven to the polls by Democrats in November.

In making their assessment, researchers looked for hopelessness, disinterest, lethargy, and feelings of failure...which are coincidentally the same qualities that Barack Obama recently accused Democratic voters of having.

But while Hope has fallen on hard times under the Democrats, Change is coming in just a few weeks. And we're confident that when it comes to improving the nation's mood, progress will beat prozac.


Anonymous said...

Ten percent are depressed. FORTY percent are desperate. about half don't have a clue. Guess which party?

pryorguy said...

I think I know that walmart greeter guy!

Pete(Detroit) said...

Yay! Thanks for bringing back the chicken footed geek - that dude freaks me out EVERY time!
Love it!

The walmart greeter dude is fun, too!

Stilton Jarlsberg said...

Readers- It's nice to know that Chickenboy is appreciated here. The past couple of years have been tough for him. Once he was a star with his own banners and tent, attracting crowds on the midway, making big money, and wining and dining beautiful sideshow groupies.

But now...well...he's just glad to have a job. Any job. Although "glad" isn't quite the word we're looking for. Oh yeah, the word is "miserable."

Pete(Detroit) said...

Yah, the only thing worse than having a job that sucks is *NOT* having a job that sucks....